Tag: cowboys

Cover photo taken from NY Post.

1 – Ravens (13-4)

“Super Bowl or Bust” is a lazy analysis, but it really feels that way for this Baltimore team. While their near future will be fruitful, this feels like the team that’s best-equipped to do what the 2019 team couldn’t.

They’re going to have to prove themselves in a big way, and Lamar Jackson is finally going to have to get the playoff monkey off his back.

2 – 49ers (12-5)

The Niners feel like the best team in the league — or at least the favorites to win it all — and Vegas agrees. This team checks every box except for the one loss to Baltimore.

Will they have the chance to avenge it? We’ll find out in due time.

3 – Lions (12-5)

Considered swapping Detroit and Dallas, but I’m still being petty after the Week 17 shenanigans.

That being said, I’m not sure how to feel about the Lions now that we’re in the postseason. I think they drew a nightmare matchup with the Rams, and I think Sam LaPorta’s apparent knee injury could loom a lot larger than it seems. But we’ll get into that this weekend.

4 – Cowboys (12-5)

Alright, you’re in. And you’re the 2 seed. You won’t have to go on the road until the last Sunday of January, if you can get that far. You have no excuse not to.

5 – Browns (11-6)

As has been stated for weeks, the Browns are the AFC Wild Card team most suited for a run in this postseason. But it certainly won’t be easy. Let’s see just how far this Joe Flacco run — and this elite defense – can carry this team.

6 – Bills (11-6)

They did what they had to do. Now they have to keep it going in January — a month that has plagued them time and time again. Is this finally the year?

7 – Chiefs (11-6)

Getting serious 2018 Patriots vibes from the Chiefs at this point. That Patriots team won the Super Bowl thanks to its elite defense and all-time quarterback doing all the right things in the playoffs.

I’m not saying Kansas City is winning it all… I’m just getting similar vibes.

8 – Rams (10-7) 2

Of all six wild card teams, the Rams are my favorite to go on a run. It doesn’t help that they’ll likely have to go to San Francisco if they win on Sunday night, but nobody wants to see this team right now.

They finished the year 7-1, the defense is cooking, and the offense has a plethora of weapons with both the rookies and the vets. I can’t wait to see what Sean McVay cooks for the postseason.

9 – Texans (10-7) 3

We did it. CJ and DeMeco did it. And man, what a story it is. Even if the Texans lose on Saturday, they should be extremely proud and even more excited for what the future holds with perhaps the best young QB/HC duo in the league.

10 – Dolphins (11-6) 2

They are what we thought they were. And that’s about all that needs to be said. A season which once had Super Bowl aspirations will now end with a whisper in Kansas City.

What a waste.

11 – Eagles (11-6) 2

Every second of this second-half collapse has been absolutely delightful to watch. The only thing better will be if the Eagles lose in Tampa on Monday night.

At this rate, I don’t see anything to make me believe that won’t be the case.

12 – Packers (9-8) 4

The Packers have been a roller coaster this year, but now that the regular season is over and this team is in the playoffs, I’m officially going to take my victory lap.

Jordan Love is clearly a franchise guy, the rookies balled out, and the defense has seemingly found itself again in the final two games. If they beat Dallas, I assure you I will be insufferable.

13 – Buccaneers (9-8) 1

Perhaps no team in the NFL proved me wrong more than the Bucs. I tip my cap and apologize to Baker and the boys. Here’s to hoping they have one more victory in them.

14 – Steelers (10-7) 6

I don’t know how we got here, but I hate it. Mason Rudolph in the playoffs… good lord.

15 – Colts (9-8)

I feel for the Colts, who had a playoff berth right in their grasp and let it slip away. But, the future is undeniably bright. If they were able to do all of this with Gardner Minshew at quarterback, can you imagine what they’ll look like if/when Anthony Richardson develops into a cyborg?

16 – Saints (9-8) 3

The Saints did enough down the stretch to make me eat a bit of crow, but alas, it still was not enough to make the dance. Another mediocre season with no results puts them further into limbo.

What comes next? I have no idea. But with Dennis Allen still at head coach, it can’t be anything good.

17 – Jaguars (9-8) 6

I haven’t given it out in recent weeks, but the Jaguars deserve to be the final Team of Shame of the season. From 8-3 and the 1 seed to 9-8 and crashing out of the playoffs when you just needed a win to be division champs.

In the words of Master Yoda: “How embarrassing.”

18 – Seahawks (9-8) 5

With Seattle missing out on the playoffs and Pete Carroll retiring as head coach, I have no idea where this team is going to go. They’re talented enough to be competitive, but clearly not good enough to be anything special.

Is it time to finally kick off the rebuild? Might just be.

19 – Bengals (9-8) 1

There’s not much I can say about the Bengals. It’s a shame this season went the way it did, but they’ll be fine. They just have to limit the damage this offseason and find an adequate replacement for Tee Higgins.

20 – Raiders (8-9) 2

Do the right thing, Raiders. Hire Antonio Pierce as the full time head coach. You simply cannot make the same mistake twice.

21 – Broncos (8-9) 4

I tuned the Broncos out after the Russell Wilson fiasco went down. I think that was for the best.

22 – Bears (7-10) 1

Well, it looks like we have our answer. Even though the Bears are retaining Matt Eberflus (for some reason), it doesn’t appear that they’ll do the same with Justin Fields. I do believe he’ll be successful elsewhere, but it’s like I said last week: it makes a lot more sense to go in a different direction in the draft.

23 – Titans (6-11) 2

Thanks for giving us the funniest collapse of Week 18, y’all.

24 – Falcons (7-10) 1

After three years of head-scratching mediocrity, Arthur Smith is finally out. And thank goodness for that.

I’ll be very interested to see who the Falcons bring in to replace him, and far more interested to see if they’re actually capable of using the abundance of talent on this roster.

25 – Vikings (7-10) 1

Minnesota enters this offseason with one major priority: retain Justin Jefferson. I don’t see a world where they keep Kirk Cousins, so all the attention — and money — should turn to Jettas. If I were him, I don’t know if I’d stay. But the Vikings have no choice.

26 – Giants (6-11) 1

See: Tennessee.

27 – Cardinals (4-13) 1

The Cardinals ended the season the same way they carried themselves for its entirety: being competitive enough to be entertaining, but not quite enough to win football games.

28 – Jets (7-10) 1

Our long national nightmare is over. The Jets won’t play football again this season.

29 – Chargers (5-12) 3

There’s a lot of work to do this offseason if you’re the Chargers. Step one is probably to fire Brandon Staley. They’ve got to get going on that front.

30 – Patriots (4-13)

Bill Belichick leaving has been in the cards for a while. I personally don’t think he’ll be coaching again, but stranger things have happened.

Regardless, with a top 3 pick and a head coaching vacancy, the Pats are in full rebuild mode now.

31 – Commanders (4-13)

Ron Rivera is finally gone. The No. 2 pick is ours, along with the most cap space in the league. Perhaps the most attractive head coaching and general managing vacancies lie in our city.

It feels good to have hope. It feels better to have results. Let’s make it happen.

32 – Panthers (2-15)

Thank goodness that’s over. See you again at the bottom of the Power Rankings next year, Carolina!

---

Cover photo taken from NBC Sports.

1 – Ravens (13-3)

Another week, another Super Bowl contender mowed down. This team is a machine, and Lamar Jackson deserves this victory lap with his second MVP.

The only question remaining: can they do it in the playoffs?

2 – 49ers (12-4)

The 49ers are probably going to be my pick to win it all, but they better hope this Christian McCaffrey injury is something that can go away in two weeks worth of rest. Because if it’s anything remotely serious, then it is fully over.

3 – Lions (11-5) 1

The year is 2124. There is a crack in the global warming shield surrounding Earth. Astronauts are going up to explore other planets that may be habitable for human life. Your local Chipotle is still out of everything, and the McDonalds ice cream machine is still broken.

And the Lions are still being cheated out of victories by NFL officiating crews.

4 – Cowboys (11-5) 4

A win is a win, and it’s hard to say a team didn’t “deserve” to win any NFL game. But man, this team is oh so lucky.

And it’s not just because of the officiating debacle at the end — Dallas should never have even been in that position, but they chose to throw the ball three times on their last possession to bleed 11 seconds off the clock with less than two minutes to play.

Mike McCarthy is clearly warming up for another clock management disasterclass in the playoffs.

5 – Browns (11-5) 2

Here’s to hoping Joe Flacco can keep this up for the playoffs.

It might seem like a long shot, but we’ve made it this far!

6 – Bills (10-6) 1

The Bills might be the most entertaining watch in the NFL right now. Not because they do anything exceptionally well, but because you truly never know what the hell you’re going to get from them.

It’s astonishing how much of a rollercoaster ride this team is. We’ll see what happens on Sunday night.

7 – Chiefs (10-6) 2

How far can this championship-level defense carry this everlasting work-in-progress offense? We’ll find out soon enough.

Maybe the week off for the starters will help the Chiefs kick it into high gear in the Wild Card. They better hope that’s the case, because whoever they draw as the 6-seed will provide a heck of a challenge.

8 – Dolphins (11-5) 5

Turns out the Dolphins are also a paper straw! Who would’ve thought?! Definitely not yours truly who warned you about this — *checks watch* — nearly three months ago!

9 – Eagles (11-5) 3

I am loving every second of this absolute collapse. This team’s talent is not able to overcome its flaws, and that will be their downfall in the coming weeks.

Cherish these moments, folks.

10 – Rams (9-7)

God I wish this team was going to Dallas for the Wild Card. I think they have everything it takes to make a run, but I don’t know if they can beat Detroit. I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

11 – Jaguars (9-7) 2

Winning games with a backup quarterback is a skill, even when those games come against the worst team in the NFL. And it makes things much simpler for the Jags: win and you’re in.

With Trevor Lawrence likely returning to the lineup, that feels like a near-certainty.

12 – Texans (9-7) 2

Turns out having C.J. Stroud healthy makes quite the difference! Shocking, I know.

While hosting a playoff game is probably out of the realm of likelihood, I still think the chips are going to fall Houston’s way to get to the playoffs and head to the house of the AFC East winner in the first round. More on that later, though.

13 – Seahawks (8-8) 2

Remember all of those positive feelings I had about the Seahawks throughout the course of this season?

Yeah, go ahead and toss all of those out. I don’t even want to see this team in the playoffs anymore.

14 – Buccaneers (8-8) 2

See: Seattle. The difference is that the playoffs are practically a guarantee with Carolina on tap.

15 – Colts (9-7) 3

Unlike the two teams above them, the Colts are a team I would love to see in the playoffs. The only problem is I want to see Houston a lot more.

Sorry, Indy. Next year, with Anthony Richardson back, you will have my undying support!

16 – Packers (8-8) 3

The roller coaster continues in Green Bay. Just when I was ready to bury them, the Packers look primed to win and get into the playoffs for a likely date in Dallas with the Cowboys.

And boy, would I love to see that with the way Jordan Love is playing right now.

17 – Broncos (8-8) 2

You guys aren’t worth my time.

18 – Bengals (8-8) 2

It’s truly a shame how this has all played out for the Bengals. It was a real possibility that things would have turned around with Joe Burrow healthy.

Now, they enter an offseason with a ton of questions and plenty of decisions to be made. We’ll see how successful or unsuccessful it winds up being.

19 – Saints (8-8) 2

They’re going to mess around and win this division aren’t they? Or at least make the playoffs? Either way, I lose.

But, I have conceded already. I can’t win with the Saints.

20 – Steelers (9-7) 4

Just when you think they’re dead and buried, Mason Rudolph of all people brings them back to life. I truly can never believe what I’m seeing from the Steelers.

We’ll see if this is enough to get Pittsburgh in the playoffs. For the sake of my eyes, I hope it’s not.

21 – Bears (7-9) 1

There’s been plenty of dialogue around Justin Fields and the No. 1 pick now that the Bears are on the clock courtesy of the ineptitude of the Carolina Panthers.

While I think Justin has done enough to retain a job, I’m not sure it’s in Chicago, no matter how much the players and fans love him. I also think this second-half “offensive boom” is being blown completely out of proportion; they’ve played an awful schedule and the stats don’t back up anything but a mediocre to below-average offensive output. It just feels like it makes more sense to move on and select a top QB with the first pick in the draft with a higher floor, a lower ceiling and a much smaller cap hit, despite the fact that you can get a king’s ransom for the No. 1 pick.

It’s no one’s fault. It’s just business.

22 – Raiders (8-8) 1

Losses like those sting a bit, but at least Davante Adams popped off for certain people’s fantasy championships. We take those.

23 – Falcons (7-9) 6

It’s almost over. Mercifully.

24 – Vikings (7-9) 4

See: Cincinnati.

25 – Titans (5-11)

That was as ugly as it gets. The Titans are in for some big changes in the coming months. They might be a contender for the 2025 No. 1 pick if we’re being honest.

We’ll cross that bridge when we get there, but the rebuild feels fully on in Nashville.

26 – Chargers (5-11)

See: Atlanta.

27 – Giants (5-11)

The most important takeaway from the last two games is that Tyrod Taylor is still a hooper. That’s literally all that matters for me.

28 – Cardinals (4-12) 2

See: New England and New York Jets last week.

For beating both Dallas and Philadelphia this year, and winning just enough games to put us in position for the No. 2 pick, the Cardinals are in extremely good graces with me.

If only they could’ve beaten us in Week 1 as well.

29 – Jets (6-10) 1

See: Atlanta/Los Angeles Chargers.

30 – Patriots (4-12) 1

You guys have one more win in you, don’t y’all? You always beat the Jets. I just need you to do it one more time, and I will never say a bad thing about the franchise ever again.

31 – Commanders (4-12)

One loss away from landing a franchise-changing quarterback. Combine that with the right hires at head coach and GM, and maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to be optimistic with this franchise for once.

Please, for the love of all that is holy, don’t mess this up.

32 – Panthers (2-14)

Don’t throw any drinks on me, please!

---

Cover photo taken from KGET.

1 – Ravens (12-3) 1

In one fell swoop, the Ravens became AFC and Super Bowl favorites, Lamar Jackson became the MVP and they became the most feared team in the league.

That’s a pretty good Christmas, if you ask me.

2 – 49ers (11-4) 1

It’s not surprising that Brock Purdy melted in a big moment. It is surprising that he melted down that badly. It’s perhaps even more shocking that the defense played as poorly as it did.

But perhaps San Francisco needed this reality check while they’re fully healthy. And the good news is, they’ll still have home field advantage in the playoffs.

3 – Dolphins (11-4) 5

It took the Dolphins til Christmas Eve to beat a team with a winning record, but what a win it was. It helps instill just the slightest bit of confidence that this team is going to do something in the playoffs.

But first, they have to win the division. And I still don’t know how much I believe in their ability to do so.

4 – Lions (11-4)

All-around sound. Nothing more to say about the Lions that I haven’t been saying for weeks. Give them their flowers.

And man, what a feeling it must be to win the division for the first time in 30 years.

5 – Bills (9-6) 2

Not the most convincing of victories on Saturday, but a win is a win.

They just have to do it two more times.

6 – Eagles (11-4)

They’re starting to become unimpressive. The flaws are making themselves more and more apparent. The playcalling seems to be getting worse and worse, and the secondary is a glaring weak spot.

Fine by me!

7 – Browns (10-5) 2

Everyone says the Bills are the team that no one in the AFC wants to see in the playoffs, but I honestly think that title belongs to the Browns. This defense is elite and — against all odds — Joe Flacco is playing out of his mind. They just keep winning and winning and winning.

I assure you, this team is going to win a playoff game. I just don’t know where it’s going to be.

8 – Cowboys (10-5) 3

Should’ve seen that coming!

This team is a fugazi. Nothing but a paper straw.

9 – Chiefs (9-6) 6

I’m finally cutting ties with the hope that the Chiefs are going to figure it out. There are two weeks left in the regular season. This is who they are: an above-average team being held back by a complete lack of competence from its offense.

They aren’t going to host the AFC Championship Game. Hell, they might not even get there. I will never doubt Patrick Mahomes in the playoffs, but what more can he do at this point?

10 – Rams (8-7)

As I’ve been saying, the Rams are the Browns/Bills of the NFC.

You do not want to see them in January.

11 – Seahawks (8-7)

The Seahawks might just be the most inconsistent team in the league. I just never know what I’m going to get. The playoffs are almost a certainty, but once they’re there? I don’t see anything happening.

12 – Buccaneers (8-7) 5

Props to Baker Mayfield for making me eat crow time and time again. He is playing better than most quarterbacks right now, and this team is thriving off of it. Whoever winds up with the 5-seed in the NFC is not going to have an easy time in Tampa.

13 – Jaguars (8-7)

Just throw in the towel. It’s over.

14 – Texans (8-7)

If C.J. Stroud comes back this week, the division is right there for the taking. Just gotta reach out and grab it.

15 – Broncos (7-8) 3

Be embarrassed. Between the on- and off-the-field antics, this team has regressed into what they were two months ago: a bad joke.

16 – Bengals (8-7) 1

The Jake Browning Linsanity run was fun while it lasted.

17 – Falcons (7-8) 4

Please don’t wind up winning this division. None of us want to see you play more games.

18 – Colts (8-7) 2

The Gardner Minshew Linsanity run was fun while it lasted.

19 – Packers (7-8) 1

Oh look, Jordan Love remembered how to play football. The defense, on the other hand, still hasn’t. That’s what happens when you employ Joe Barry.

20 – Vikings (7-8) 2

The Vikings have thrown in the towel, and I do not blame them at all. It’s a true shame how this season ended up playing out.

21 – Saints (7-8) 2

It’s okay, Saints fans. It’s almost over.

22 – Bears (6-9) 1

I truly think Justin Fields has done enough to keep his job for another year. While the Bears have options, I think it makes too much sense to keep Justin for another year and continue this rebuild around him.

23 – Raiders (7-8) 1

Antonio Pierce, man. What a guy. How are the Raiders better at appointing interim-head coaches than finding actual ones?

24 – Steelers (8-7) 4

So, you won a game. Don’t think this brings you back into my good graces. I still want nothing to do with you.

25 – Titans (5-10) 3

Thanks for the memories this season, Will Levis. We’ll be seeing you in September.

26 – Chargers (5-10) 1

See: New Orleans.

27 – Giants (5-10) 1

The Tommy Devito Linsanity run was fun while it lasted.

28 – Jets (6-9) 1

Thank you so so so much. Your willingness to win will forever live in the hearts of Washington fans. Our imminent franchise-changing QB is forever in your debt.

29 – Patriots (4-11) 2

See: New York Jets.

30 – Cardinals (3-12) 1

Can you do me a favor and win a game or two down the stretch? Cheers.

31 – Commanders (4-11) 1

While it has never been more over than it currently is, we might finally have a generational talent at QB fall into our lap. Just two more losses to go. Bring it home, baby.

32 – Panthers (2-13)

Good for Bryce Young to put a few great games on tape. The kid has a bright future. The team just needs to do the right thing and rebuild successfully. But, with David Tapper at the helm, that feels like an impossibility.

---

Cover photo taken from Syracuse.com.

1 – 49ers (11-3)

“Buzzsaw” is starting to look like an understatement. Brock Purdy isn’t about to win MVP, is he?

2 – Ravens (11-3) 1

Never thought I’d be looking forward to Christmas because the Baltimore Ravens are playing, but here we are. Monday night’s contest in the Bay is my most-anticipated regular season tilt in… God knows how long.

3 – Chiefs (9-5) 2

I mean… that’s fine, I guess. Still need to see some real improvement against some real competition.

4 – Lions (10-4) 2

Consider me re-convinced. That was amazing.

5 – Cowboys (10-4) 3

Felt like a return to Earth was inevitable, but man… it wasn’t supposed to look like that.

6 – Eagles (10-4) 2

I’m loving absolutely every single second of this.

7 – Bills (8-6) 2

It’s true that nobody wants to see the Bills right now. It’s not true that nobody wants to see the Bills in the playoffs, considering they are incapable of winning at that time. Let’s stop that narrative, please.

8 – Dolphins (10-4) 1

Didn’t really want to bump Miami down this week, but there was literally nothing else I could have done.

9 – Browns (9-5) 1

Didn’t really want to up Cleveland down this week, but there was literally nothing else I could have done. Sigh.

10 – Rams (7-7) 3

The Rams are the Bills of the NFC, but the media will never give them that. I, however, will. Largely because my preseason take about this team will haunt me forever.

11 – Seahawks (7-7) 6

That was as much-needed of a win as they come in this league. What once looked like a team crashing out of the playoffs suddenly has a sharp upward trajectory. Should be a fascinating final few weeks.

12 – Broncos (7-7) 4

Literally the exact opposite of the Seahawks. We’re back to the September weirdness in Denver.

13 – Jaguars (8-6) 2

Just so… meh.

14 – Texans (8-6) 2

Moving the Texans down this week felt criminal, but I still don’t know what to expect out of them while C.J. Stroud continues to miss time, especially now that they have to face Cleveland.

15 – Bengals (8-6)

The legend of Jake Browning is truly something to behold. Cincinnati really had no business winning that game on Saturday, but here we are. And a playoff spot is theirs to lose.

16 – Colts (8-6)

I’ve been singing this team’s praises for a while now, and for good reason. They’re just so solid and extremely deserving of a playoff spot. I hope they get it.

17 – Buccaneers (7-7) 3

I’ll be damned, this team is actually going to win the division, and it might actually be because Baker Mayfield is an above average quarterback. These are truly the end times.

18 – Vikings (7-7) 1

I was wrong. It doesn’t really matter who lines up under center for the Vikings. They’re going to be competitive no matter what. They literally don’t know what it’s like to be uncompetitive.

19 – Saints (7-7) 3

Real strong possibility this team loses out, and I wouldn’t mind that at all.

20 – Packers (6-8) 6

I victory lapped far too soon. Consider this a lesson learned. Also, it’s nice to know that Joe Barry will likely never have another NFL job.

21 – Falcons (6-8)

Should I have moved the Falcons down this week? Probably. But I’ve been lower on them than most for the entirety of the season, and no team below them deserves to jump them. So they stay put.

22 – Titans (5-9) 1

Where is Derrick Henry? Has anyone seen him? Isn’t he supposed to be a key to this team’s success? No? I guess not.

23 – Bears (5-9) 1

We’re approaching the “Bears drafting a QB at No. 1 is a mistake” territory. No, seriously.

24 – Raiders (6-8) 4

Hahahahaha that was incredible. Thank you for that.

25 – Chargers (5-9) 7

Brandon Staley fired three games too late… maybe a couple of seasons too late.

26 – Giants (5-9) 1

Did you guys know Tommy Devito is Italian?

27 – Jets (4-10) 1

I have zero interest in watching this team play a single second of football for the remainder of the season. Which is fantastic, because they host us this weekend.

28 – Steelers (7-7) 1

While I might still be acting too harsh towards the Steelers, I’d like to think that no team quarterbacked by Mason Rudolph deserves a spot anywhere but the bottom five.

29 – Cardinals (3-11)

The Cardinals’ jig is up. Being kind of competitive isn’t competitive enough.

30 – Commanders (4-10)

What a roller coaster it has been. From “wow Sam Howell is kind of good” to “Sam Howell is the future” to Sam Howell being benched and likely losing the keys to the franchise is the epitome of this team’s quarterback situation in my lifetime. One day, the pain will end. Today is not that day.

31 – Patriots (3-11)

Congratulations, you were just competitive enough to remain at 31 this week. Barely.

32 – Panthers (2-12)

Carolina winning on Sunday felt inevitable. Good for the team, and all four fans who stuck around in the deluge to watch it.

---

Cover photo taken from Lone Star Live.

1 – 49ers (10-3)

Buzzsaw.

2 – Cowboys (10-3) 1

Playing perhaps the best football of any team in the league right now. Would be fascinated to see how a game against San Francisco would look today.

3 – Ravens (10-3) 1

They’re finding ways to win. That’s scary.

4 – Eagles (10-3) 2

LOL.

5 – Chiefs (8-5)

Had no idea what to do with them. Such a strange second half of this season.

6 – Lions (9-4)

See: above.

7 – Dolphins (9-4)

See: above again.

8 – Broncos (7-6) 4

I don’t think anyone in the league wants to see this team right now.

9 – Bills (7-6) 4

See: above.

10 – Browns (8-5) 4

Joe Flacco leading the Browns to the playoffs in 2023. Who would’ve thought?

11 – Jaguars (8-5) 2

I think they’ll be fine. Division should be free to take.

12 – Texans (7-6) 4

Injuries suck.

13 – Rams (6-7) 3

I don’t care that they lost or that they’re below .500. This is a damn good team.

14 – Packers (6-7) 4

So much for me being vindicated.

15 – Bengals (7-6) 5

The legend of Jake Browning. This is a playoff team with him playing like this.

16 – Colts (7-6) 5

In a battle of backups, Gardner Minshew got one-upped.

17 – Seahawks (6-7) 2

Okay, now it’s fully falling apart.

18 – Chargers (5-8) 1

How is Brandon Staley still employed?

19 – Vikings (7-6) 1

From perhaps the ugliest win ever to demoting Josh Dobbs to a third-string QB and putting your season in the hands of Nick Mullens… yeah, it’s over.

20 – Buccaneers (6-7) 4

Thank you for making this division even more hilarious.

21 – Falcons (6-7) 1

You had one job.

22 – Saints (6-7) 1

Please don’t win this division.

23 – Titans (5-8) 2

Good for Will Levis and the Titans. They needed that.

24 – Bears (5-8) 2

Justin Fields might’ve secured his job for next season. Whether that’s in Chicago or elsewhere is yet to be determined.

25 – Giants (5-8) 2

Is Tommy Devito… the answer?

26 – Jets (5-8) 4

That must’ve felt like an exorcism.

27 – Steelers (7-6) 8

Even I realize that this is harsh, but golly. What the hell is going on?

28 – Raiders (5-8) 7

Never again.

29 – Cardinals (3-10) 1

One month away from Marvin Harrison Jr.

30 – Commanders (4-9) 1

Bye weeks are the best.

31 – Patriots (3-10) 1

Where on Earth did that come from?

32 – Panthers (1-12) 1

simpsons_stop_hes_already_dead.jpg

---