Tag: Week 6

Cover photo taken from AP Photo.

1 – Buccaneers (5-1) 1

No matter how many players get added to the injury report, Baker Mayfield continues to do Baker Mayfield things. He’s the MVP of the league right now, and it might not be close.

Oh, and this has been the tough part of their schedule, too. We’re looking at the clear-cut frontrunner for the 1-seed in the NFC.

2 – Colts (5-1)

I’ll be honest, I didn’t really want to keep the Colts this high, but I just don’t know what to do with them. But, they keep winning, and that offense keeps looking good doing it.

Let’s just keep things under control during pregame warmups moving forward, yeah?

3 – Lions (4-2) 2

It was strange seeing the Lions — usually the bullies, not the bullied — get handled the way they did in Kansas City.

But, for one, the Chiefs are pretty dang good and catching their stride. And secondly, we’re a pre-snap penalty and an uncharacteristic Amon-Ra St. Brown drop away from a potentially different story here. This team is still elite, and they’re going to be fine.

4 – Rams (4-2) 3

I feel like I learned nothing about the Rams on Sunday.

The defense is fine, sure, but they played one of the league’s most anemic offenses. The offense sputtered, but that’s to be expected when their most impactful position player leaves with an injury. I hope Puka Nacua is okay and heals fast, because this team needs him badly.

I think the trip to London to take on the Jags will reveal infinitely more than whatever the hell transpired in Baltimore.

5 – Seahawks (4-2) 4

A little high for Seattle? Maybe. But considering how wonky the landscape of the league is right now, I don’t mind putting them this high. Not when they’re clicking like they have been.

I hate playing the ifs-ands-buts-or-maybes game, but we’re two last-second scores away from the Seahawks being 6-0 with one of the league’s most balanced squads spearheaded by the OPOY frontrunner. Jaxon Smith-Njigba has been the best receiver in football, Sam Darnold is still wildly efficient and this defense had a nice bounce-back performance. They should parlay that into some more solid performances against a stingy part of their schedule.

6 – Bills (4-2) 2

I’m officially concerned.

Josh Allen does not look like himself right now. The team continues to ignore James Cook. The lack of true receiving threats is becoming obvious. And the defense is… just bad, I guess?

Is that what the Bills are when they’re playing competent football teams? I think that remains to be seen. They’ve earned the benefit of the doubt. But they better hope they get this thing back on track after the bye. I think that’s coming at a pretty good time for them.

7 – Packers (3-1-1) 2

Green Bay is another team that I feel like I learned nothing about this week. They’re just so… “meh” right now.

I suppose my two biggest takeaways are that Josh Jacobs has been awesome and this defense still feels off. I expect one of those to continue, but if the latter doesn’t change as the schedule ramps up, the Packers will inevitably drop some games.

8 – Chiefs (3-3) 5

The living embodiment of the “masculine urge to say ‘we’re so back’ after saying ‘it’s over'” meme.

But, the Chiefs do feel back. Patrick Mahomes is the odds-on favorite to win the MVP right now, and it’s easy to see why. Rashee Rice returns from his suspension this week. The defense played inspired after the disaster to end the Jaguars game.

Everything just feels like it’s clicking in Kansas City. The league should be terrified.

9 – Patriots (4-2) 5

Regardless of the level of competition, the Patriots deserve our respect. They’re playing pretty damn well on both sides of the ball, and Drake Maye has been one of the five or six best quarterbacks in football in 2025.

And, honestly, that’s going to continue to be the case in New England. This is the easiest schedule in football, so I feel like there’s only so much we’re going to be able to say about the Pats moving forward. I guess the only question is: how successful can they be?

10 – Steelers (4-1) 6

Like the Patriots, the Steelers are a team I’ve held off on going crazy over because I just feel so indifferent about them. But, being 4-1 and clearly finding a rhythm goes a long way. I gotta tip my cap to Mike Tomlin and Aaron Rodgers. This is your AFC North frontrunner.

It obviously doesn’t take much to stifle the Browns offense, but this defense has vastly improved since the opening weeks of the season, and so has the rushing offense. I feel like that’s what has made the difference for this squad. As long as they keep stacking wins against their easier opponents, they’re going to win this division.

11 – Falcons (3-2) 9

I said last week that I was fascinated to see what version of the Falcons we got on MNF. And boy, did we get their best. That is how dangerous this Atlanta team can be.

Michael Penix Jr. was accurate, efficient and on time. Drake London was unguardable. And Bijan Robinson is simply the deadliest weapon in the NFL right now. Not to mention, this defense responded to a so-so outing against Washington with a wildly dominant performance against Josh Allen of all people.

This is a playoff team if they can keep this level of play up. I worry about their ability to do that, but I’m rooting for them. Because this is a damn fun group.

12 – 49ers (4-2) 6

We’re reaching a point where these injuries are going to make winning unsustainable in the long-term. They can win games like they have every now and then, but I have serious doubts about this being a playoff team with no Fred Warner or Nick Bosa on defense.

I want to believe that Kyle Shanahan can keep up the magic act and get this team in a competitive spot down the stretch. But I just don’t see that happening with the current state of the roster.

13 – Commanders (3-3) 3

I don’t know man. I just don’t know. That was about as unfathomable and as big of a gut-punch of a loss that I’ve seen. I feel like I could write a dissertation about it, but I won’t. Because I don’t want to. I want to flush it out of my memory forever. But there are a couple things that need mentioning.

First and most obvious is that you can’t have a laundry list of screw-ups and expect to win an NFL game. The fact that they were in a position to win despite two first-quarter turnovers, a missed field goal, a number of penalties, no real run game and a defense that couldn’t stop a stationary vehicle is a testament to Jayden Daniels. After his uncharacteristic redzone interception, he was close to flawless. Until he wasn’t. And that fumble on what would’ve essentially been the game-clinching play is by far the biggest mistake of his young career.

But the defense didn’t have to make it easy for the Bears to then win the game. This unit is a disgrace. They haven’t forced a turnover in four of the six games and couldn’t even force a three-and-out on Monday night. Against an offense that had some serious struggles coming into the game, albeit off a bye. The holes that D’Andre Swift was running through could clear up DC’s traffic in an instant. And the zones in the secondary continue to be Charmin soft.

My main takeaway from MNF is that this team in its current state isn’t good enough to win when Jayden isn’t Superman. He’s human. He’s going to make mistakes. And the team around him isn’t good enough to overcome them when they happen.

14 – Jaguars (4-2) 6

Wait, this offense sucks again. What the heck happened?

I have no idea why this team can no longer run the ball, but it’s clear that unless the defense steps up to flip the game, Trevor Lawrence can’t do it on his own. He has been solid this year, but they need that balance to be successful. And it doesn’t help when the defense doesn’t get a takeaway.

Maybe Seattle was a bad matchup. Maybe this was just a bad game. Jacksonville should hope it doesn’t become a trend.

15 – Broncos (4-2) 4

Good lord this team is a dreadful watch. If this defense wasn’t so good, I don’t know what Denver would look like.

When the Broncos can’t establish a run game like they couldn’t on Sunday morning, we see just how limited — and sometimes straight up bad — Bo Nix is. And that’s a problem. I don’t know that I can classify this as a sophomore slump because I wasn’t particularly impressed with Nix last year. But he has not been able to elevate this team in any way shape or form. They just have to pray the defense dominates and the offense keeps up. That doesn’t feel like a winning formula. But at least the AFC is weak enough for it to work.

16 – Eagles (4-2) 4

Looks like I’ve been vindicated on my Eagles ranking from last week. Because it sure as hell feels like it’s all coming apart in Philadelphia.

I know we go through this song and dance every year, but like 2023, this one feels like it’s not as easy a fix as “locking in” like it was last season. Kevin Patullo’s offensive scheme is a disaster, Jalen Hurts isn’t good enough to overcome the lack of a run game, the wide receivers are in shambles and this secondary straight up stinks. Those unsustainable September winning ways have turned into abysmal October performances. And the schedule ain’t getting easier.

The Giants were supposed to be the get-right game. It might’ve been the exposé instead.

17 – Chargers (4-2) 2

I give a ton of credit to the Chargers for finding a way to win on Sunday in Miami. Those types of heroics from Justin Herbert are exactly what this team needed as they continue to deal with injuries galore.

But I still have pretty mixed feelings about this team. I don’t like how this defense is playing and the run game is a huge problem. But, Herbert can put on the cape if necessary. And, against the bad teams on the schedule, that’s enough.

18 – Vikings (3-2) 1

So, is JJ McCarthy coming back this week or not? Either way, I need a Brian Flores masterclass against a struggling Eagles offense. Do me a solid, Minnesota.

19 – Texans (2-3)

Like Atlanta last week, I’m fascinated to see what version of the Texans we get on Monday night. I hope it’s one that I enjoy watching — and one with an offense that looks like it did the last two times we saw them rather than the three previous times.

20 – Bears (3-2) 1

Good for y’all. You ran the ball and stopped the run way better than I expected. And you took advantage of our mistakes.

The narrative very well could’ve been different if not for a cataclysmic mistake by Jayden Daniels. But it’s not. And I have to live with that now.

21 – Panthers (3-3) 3

Are the Panthers frisky? Or just sneaky good? I genuinely have no clue.

But, Bryce Young is finding a groove. Rico Dowdle has turned into Ladanian Tomlinson for some reason. And Tetairoa McMillan is finally catching touchdowns. The defense is still bad, but they were shockingly excellent against Dallas’ great rushing attack.

Maybe, just maybe, the Panthers are turning a corner. But I won’t count those chickens before they hatch.

22 – Cowboys (2-3-1) 4

This defense, man. They are a historically hilarious handicap. I feel like I’m watching the 2020 Cowboys all over again.

There’s not much that can be said about Dallas that isn’t painfully obvious. Dak Prescott is amazing, George Pickens is perfect for this offense, Jake Ferguson has arguably been the best tight end in football and none of it matters because the defense is the worst in the league by lightyears. I don’t care that Javonte Williams was neutralized; that’s a game you can’t lose to stay afloat in the playoff race. But, here we are.

23 – Giants (2-4) 5

Jaxson Dart and Cam Skattebo are changing the culture in New York. They also might be saving the jobs of Brian Daboll and Joe Schoen. Good for them.

Maybe the Giants can sustain winning with this level of play on both sides of the ball. But, we’re also just a week or so removed from the Saints game. So I won’t jump to any conclusions just yet. But, Thursday night was awesome, and that’s all that matters for now.

24 – Ravens (1-5) 2

Good news: the defense didn’t give up a million points and Lamar Jackson should be back on the other side of the bye.

Bad news: the defense still sucks, you scored three whole points, Derrick Henry couldn’t get in on the goal line and you’re 3.5 games behind the Steelers. Woof.

25 – Cardinals (2-4) 2

Credit to the shorthanded Cards for hanging in with the Colts. Jacoby Brissett was airing that thing out all day long, and it damn near led to an upset win. It’s just not enough.

I really don’t think the Cardinals are this bad. Unlucky, sure. But four losses in a row are hard to overcome. I still think they can turn it around, but it’s going to need to be drastic and fast.

26 – Dolphins (1-5) 1

Nothing on the field is worth talking about in Miami. So I’ll take this time to ask Tua Tagovailoa what the hell he’s talking about.

If this team has leadership issues, that starts with you bro. You’re the damn quarterback! And you just threw three picks! Take some accountability and stop throwing your teammates under the bus. This is the reason why no one in that locker room likes you.

27 – Saints (1-5)

Another week where we say, “wow, Spencer Rattler is actually solid” and it doesn’t matter because the rest of the team ain’t very good.

This Saints team will continue to be competitive, but will also continue to lose. They’re just not a good squad.

28 – Bengals (2-4) 2

Joe Flacco being inserted at quarterback had exactly the effect we expected it to: Ja’Marr Chase and Tee Higgins saw the ball a ton, and it doesn’t really mean anything. The rest of this team is in such squalor that I don’t know how they beat anyone with a pulse.

29 – Browns (1-5) 3

Speaking of not having a pulse, I feel like it’s only a matter of time before we see Sheduer Sanders — no pun intended.

Dillon Gabriel is fine and all, but there’s nothing there. Might as well give Mr. Perfect Timing a shot.

30 – Raiders (2-4) 1

Oh look, a win! Cherish that one, Raiders. There aren’t any more Titans left on the schedule.

31 – Titans (1-5) 2

Thank you for firing Brian Callahan. What comes next? Who knows. But I still think the Titans have the right GM and QB, despite Cam Ward’s abysmal game on Sunday.

32 – Jets (0-6)

You should take some notes from Tennessee. Nip this Aaron Glenn experiment in the bud, move on from Justin Fields and see what your new GM can cook up during this upcoming offseason. Because it is over over in New York.

Cover photo taken from Pride of Detroit.

1 – 49ers (5-1)

It wouldn’t feel quite fair to knock the 49ers to lose a game that they lost at the behest of poor refereeing and a missed field goal at the death after losing three of their best players, including the guy who currently has my MVP vote. It especially didn’t feel right considering that this is the NFL where great teams lose all the time, and a lot of other very good teams didn’t look the part on Sunday.

So, San Francisco remains on top, where they rightfully belong. I do think Brock Purdy’s worst performance yet could definitely be a cause for concern, but he was playing a defense that’s on a historic tear and, like I said, lost three of his best offensive players. He and the rest of the unit should be fine moving forward. But, that could change if these injuries start to pile up and derail them — a story that the Niners are definitely tired of hearing at this point. 

2 – Chiefs (5-1) 1

The Chiefs and Eagles have flip-flopped a good deal over these last few weeks. The main reason I’m bumping KC back up to the No. 2 slot is their defense, which has looked a lot better than Philly’s has. This is the best defense the Chiefs have had in the Patrick Mahomes era, and their dominance makes up for the shortcomings of Mahomes and the offense.

Those shortcomings continue to be a bit concerning, but it’s not like they’re the 2022 Broncos offense. Patrick just threw for 300 yards and Rashee Rice is starting to emerge as a potential WR1. The problem is finishing drives and limiting poor turnovers — something the Chiefs have had a lot of trouble with in recent weeks. I’d like to think they’re just throwing stuff at the wall because they’re bored. We won’t have our answer until they travel to Germany in a few weeks to take on the Dolphins. 

3 – Eagles (5-1) 1

Yikes. Losing to the Jets for the first time in franchise history thanks to three Jalen Hurts interceptions and incompetence in the defensive backfield against Zach Wilson is a bad look.

I’m not going to overreact though; the Jets defense is nothing short of elite, even without their top corners, and the Birds were due for a dud. But Hurts hasn’t been nearly as good as he was last year, especially when he plays defenses with a pulse, and although the defensive front is arguably the best in the league, the secondary continues to hold the unit back. Now, they’re dealing with injuries to make matters even worse.

Jalen and the offense will bounce back, but there are some cracks starting to show all over the place. With an absolute gauntlet of elite teams and offenses coming up, we’re about to see just what the 2023 Eagles are made of. 

4 – Dolphins (5-1)

There’s nothing new I can say about the Dolphins. I will say this though… yes, their offense is mesmerizing, but we need to examine their schedule up to this point. 

First was the Chargers: the worst secondary in football. Then, the Patriots: maybe the worst team in football with the worst starting quarterback in the league. Then came the Broncos: worst total defense, worst rushing defense, worst scoring defense and third worst passing defense in football. After starting 3-0, they played the only team with a pulse on their schedule thus far: the Bills, who absolutely decimated them on both sides of the ball. And the Bills aren’t even that good. After that humbling, they’ve beat up on the Giants and Panthers at home, two of the worst teams and offensive lines in the NFL.

So, to recap, Miami’s five wins are against the two worst scoring defenses in the league, the three worst rushing defenses in the league, two of the three worst passing defenses in the league, the second worst passing offense in the league, and the worst scoring offense in the league. 

Maybe, just maybe, this is a fugazi. Only time will tell. I think the Dolphins are a very good team. A great team, even. And they’re only going to get better once they get healthier. I’m just saying, we should be a bit cautious. 

5 – Lions (5-1)

In a week littered with such strange performances from teams at the top, I had half a mind to put the Lions at the No. 1 spot considering how dominant they looked in what we all expected to be a close game in Tampa.

With their top two running backs out, the offense didn’t miss a beat, in large part thanks to Amon-Ra St. Brown’s monster return to the field. Jared Goff continues to play like an MVP candidate behind what might just be the best offensive line in the league. But, as I’ve been saying all year long, the most impressive trend in Detroit is the play of the defense. The Lions are one of only two teams in the league with a top seven offense and defense. The other? San Francisco.

This team is elite. They might just be the best in the NFC right now, if not the league. Considering how wide open the NFL looks right now, who knows what 2023 has in store for the Lions?

6 – Jaguars (4-2)

Death. Taxes. The Jaguars beating the Colts in Jacksonville.

There’s not a whole lot I can say about that performance, other than that it was more dominant than I expected. Travis Etienne continues to look like one of the best running backs in the league, Trevor Lawrence keeps on doing his thing, and the defense still looks better and better by the week.

I understand that they just played a below average team with a backup quarterback, but considering how the Jags looked in their first matchup with the Colts and some of the lows we’ve seen out of them thus far, it inspires a lot of confidence to see them ball out the way they have in recent weeks. 

7 – Ravens (4-2) 2

See what happens when Lamar Jackson gets some help from his surrounding cast? It’s that easy!

Sunday’s win across the pond showcased the exact formula that Baltimore needs to execute week in and week out to keep on winning games: help Lamar enough and let the defense do the rest. Considering the talent level on both sides of the ball, it should not be as hard as they made it look through the first month or so. The Ravens need to keep this up though, as the rest of the division continues to nip at their heels. 

8 – Bills (4-2) 1

The Bills are the only team to move down after a win this week. I feel like I don’t really need to explain myself here, but just in case you needed some evidence, here it is:

Buffalo was outgained by the Giants through the air and on the ground. Buffalo lost the turnover battle. Buffalo lost the time of possession battle. Buffalo didn’t score until the fourth quarter against a bottom five scoring defense. By all accounts, Buffalo should have lost at home as two-touchdown favorites in a primetime game against perhaps the worst team in the NFL, in large part thanks to offensive shortcomings.

I’ll give credit to Josh Allen for pulling this team out of the dirt and leading them to victory, but it should never, ever have been that close. The Giants had the ball on the goal line twice and came away with 0 points. Just a field goal on both of those possessions would have led to the upset. The game marked the second consecutive week where the Bills had just 7 points with five minutes left in the game. There are real issues with this offense, and although the defense had an okay game, they’re clearly reeling from their losses due to injury. If all of this continues to persist, it’ll be hard to have much faith in the Bills moving forward. 

9 – Cowboys (4-2) 1

After last week’s embarrassment, the Cowboys played perhaps the most predictable game of all time on Monday night, picking up a narrow win over the Chargers. But, two things stood out to me about their performance: the play of Dak Prescott and the defensive dominance. 

Both make sense when you consider the context. Dak was facing the worst pass defense in the league, and the defense was due for a bounce-back night after getting tossed around the previous week by the 49ers. But to see it all come together like that was a positive sign.

What’s not a positive sign, however, is how that only led to a three-point win against a pretty “meh” team in the Chargers, who practically handed them the game. My biggest takeaway from these last two weeks is that Dallas is going to be in close games against any team with a semblance of a pulse, and if they match up with a truly elite team, then it’s not going to be pretty. 

10 – Browns (3-2) 1o

I’ve admittedly been underrating the Browns all year long compared to a lot of other Power Rankings. My main rationale for that was that, despite their defensive dominance, I didn’t really buy into their offense. And although I still have to be convinced, I have no choice but to put some respect on Cleveland after Sunday’s huge win over the undefeated 49ers. 

It’s not just that the defense is dominant, by the way. They’re historically great. They’re statistically the best defense that the NFL has seen in 50 years. 50 years! Only giving up 200 yards per game is absolutely incredible. That unit deserves every game ball, but especially Sunday’s, as they completely decimated a 49ers offense which had cut through every other opponent. Yes, Deebo Samuel and Christian McCaffrey weren’t a part of the equation for a large majority of the game, but they still deserve their flowers.

This is the type of defense to completely carry a team through a season, no matter how lackluster the offense is. If they can beat the Niners with P.J. Walker starting at QB, then who knows what else they’re capable of? 

11 – Bengals (3-3) 6

I’m still not going to rush to any conclusions and declare the Bengals as “back” because their offense is simply too inconsistent. This is a big jump, but it’s not because Joe Burrow and Ja’Marr Chase necessarily lit up the scoreboard again. It’s because the Cincinnati defense continues to come up huge in all of the biggest moments. 

By all accounts, it’s a daily middle-of-the-pack defense, and that’s reflected in the statistics. They just get stops and force turnovers at all the most opportune moments. They completely shut down the Seahawks in the redzone on back-to-back drives to seal Sunday’s win. The Bengals had no business winning that game, which shows in the box score, but the defense ensured that they did. And that was absolutely massive as they’re now back to .500 and still just one game out of first place.

Now, they head into a bye against a massive stretch with games consecutive games against San Francisco and Buffalo. If they win one or both of those games, then maybe I’ll say the Bengals are back. 

12 – Rams (3-3)

Predictably, getting Cooper Kupp back completely elevated this already elite offense to new, but familiar heights. There’s not much that needs to be said about that.

The defense played what was probably their best game of the year, which was an inspiring sight. But, they were also playing the Cardinals, and the wheels are starting to come off their offense. So, I’m taking it with a grain of salt.

Simply put, the Rams did what they were supposed to do on Sunday. Nothing more, nothing less. For that, they stay put. I’m going to need to see a lot more out of them against much better opposition to get a better read on them. 

13 – Seahawks (3-2) 5

I feel like I’m being very harsh to the Seahawks here. Maybe it’s deserved considering how they completely threw away Sunday’s win. The way I see it, I’m giving them room to redeem themselves. 

Neither side of the ball looked poor by any means on Sunday as the offense racked up yards at will and the defense got up to their usual lockdown ways, especially in the secondary. They outgained the Bengals by nearly 160 yards, forced one more turnover than Cincy, and held the ball for six more minutes. But, as I said above, the two late redzone stops completely buried them. 

So, by all accounts the Seahawks deserved to win. Still, considering the way it played out in addition to the performances of some other teams in this proverbial tier of the Power Rankings, I had to knock them down this far. 

14 – Texans (3-3) 4

In a season with no standout MVP candidates other than Christian McCaffrey, are were sure C.J. Stroud isn’t in the thick of the race? The rookie signal-caller continues to be the best player in his class, using his precision accuracy and veteran anticipation to lead his team to victories.

The Texans have already matched their win total from a year ago, and it only took six games. That’s a remarkable achievement for this franchise, and it’s all thanks to the former Buckeye. Their defense also continues to improve — they may give up a lot of yards, but they step up when their number is called.

As it stands, the Texans have a long way to go before contending with Jacksonville for a division title. But I love absolutely everything that’s going on in Houston. And it’s only going to keep getting better. 

15 – Jets (3-3) 9

The Jets very well might have the best culture in the NFL. That culture is leading directly to wins. It’s honestly so much fun to watch. 

This team had no business beating the Eagles — for the first time in franchise history, might I add — with Zach Wilson starting under center behind a beat-up offensive line and with the secondary being littered with injuries. But they did thanks to an inspiring fourth quarter performance. The defense is going to get healthier, and for all his faults, Zach Wilson is playing some decent ball, which means more wins are coming for the Jets.

This was the type of win to completely turn a season around. They are going to be in the thick of this Wild Card race. 

16 – Chargers (2-3) 5

I don’t know what to say about the Chargers anymore. The feeling that’s most prominent when it comes to them is concern.

I think Justin Herbert’s hand injury is a bigger problem than we realize, I think Austin Ekeler being largely ineffective in his return is troubling, and that defense is just so damn bad.

Combine all of that with the fact that the Chargers are perennially incapable of winning big or close games and you have a team that’s destined for a very, very mediocre season. 

17 – Steelers (3-2) 2

The Steelers had themselves a bye week ahead of a very interesting matchup out west against the Rams on Sunday in what should be a great test for their defense. More on that tomorrow. 

18 – Packers (2-3) 3

The Packers’ bye week probably couldn’t have come at a better time as Jordan Love tries to bounce back from last week’s miserable Monday night performance and Aaron Jones continues to try and come back from his injury. 

The good news for Green Bay is that they’re facing Denver this week in what figures to be a get-right spot for Love and whoever lines up at running back as the Broncos give up the most total and rushing yards per game of any team in the league. 

19 – Buccaneers (3-2) 6

For the second consecutive home game, the Buccaneers laid a complete dud against one of the NFL’s elites. But for this one to come off a bye week is pretty telling.

This is a team that’s going to beat all of the bad teams on its schedule, and plenty of the mediocre ones. They’re going to put together some eye-opening games, like they did in New Orleans a few weeks ago. They might be good enough to win this division or fight for a Wild Card spot. But they’re really nothing special. 

20 – Saints (3-3) 4

The Saints might just be the most infuriating watch in the NFL right now. They’re just such a nothing team. They put up completely empty stats which mean nothing by the fourth quarter because that’s when they forget how to move the football. The defense is great until it’s time to actually be great, where they refuse to. Their only convincing performance came against what might be the worst offense the NFL has seen in years.

It’s not that the Saints are puzzling. It’s that they’re painfully boring and impossible to care about. They do nothing that makes anyone care about their games, and their games are all the same. It’s mind-numbing. 

21 – Commanders (3-3) 2

Oh look, a win! I almost forgot what these looked like.

Here’s the skinny: it feels good to win, but that was not a very good performance by any means, and I still don’t feel good about this team at all.

Yes, Sam Howell was slicing and dicing to the tune of his first three-touchdown game. But he also kept on taking bad sacks and remains on pace to be the most-sacked quarterback in a season in NFL history. Yes, the defense nabbed three game-clinching interceptions. But they were playing what is probably the worst quarterback in the NFL who handed the game to them on a silver platter.

At the end of the day, we still were outgained by over 200 yards while putting up less than 200 yards ourselves, we held the ball for 13 less minutes, and realistically had no business winning. It’s not a sustainable formula, and one that certainly won’t fly against teams with better quarterbacks than Desmond Ridder. That’s essentially each of the 30 other teams in the NFL. 

22 – Falcons (3-3) 8

I told you so.

The defense is good. The skill position players are more than good.

The quarterback is anything but.

See: No. 21.

23 – Raiders (3-3) 2

The Raiders are kind of like the Saints in the sense that they’re also a “nothing” team, but for some reason, I enjoy watching them far more than New Orleans. At least Vegas keeps things entertaining.

Despite consecutive wins to get back to .500, I’m still not very impressed by this team, and another injury to Jimmy Garoppolo makes it much harder to be. I also hate how Josh Jacobs and Davante Adams continue to be ghosts in this offense. But hey, it’s working. 

24 – Colts (3-3) 3

The news that Anthony Richardson’s season is over is actually so sad. I loved watching the rookie work, but shutting him down is the right decision. He has proven that he has the talent to be the centerpiece of this rebuild, and the Colts know that his health is the top priority. I just hope that he comes back stronger and better than ever. That’s going to be one scary sight for the league. 

So, Garnder Minshew will be the main man in Indianapolis for the rest of the year. He might have led the Colts to some early wins, but Sunday’s showing was his worst yet, and this team might be in for a long few months.

If you ask me, their best course of action is to keep losing and bring home a kid with a name that’s very familiar to Colts fans everywhere to pair up with Richardson next year. Just an idea. 

25 – Vikings (2-4) 1

Meh.

Oh, I almost forgot…

Regression to the mean. 11-0 in one-score games in 2022. 2-4 in such games in 2023. Crazy to think last year’s Vikes would be the NFL’s lone unbeaten right now!

26 – Titans (2-4) 4

God, this team is so boring. I don’t envy any of you who woke up early to watch the Titans do nothing offensively for three hours on Sunday morning. I truly never want anything to do with this team. 

Now, to make matters worse, Ryan Tannehill is hurt once again. I know Malik Willis relieved him on Sunday, but if I were the Titans, I’d go ahead and start Will Levis after the bye if Tannehill can’t go. You picked him in the second round for a reason, and he’s more pro-ready than Willis, somehow. Let’s see what the kid can do. 

27 – Cardinals (1-5)

The wheels are starting to fall off the Cardinals, especially offensively. The injury to James Conner has made them completely ineffective on that side of the ball as they didn’t even reach the endzone on Sunday. The defense also continues to struggle against elite passing attacks as Matthew Stafford and Cooper Kupp completely cut them up.

Are the Cardinals still frisky? Probably. But that’s about it. Wins are going to be a commodity from here on out.  

28 – Bears (1-5)

Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse for the Bears, Justin Fields completely messes up his throwing hand. Now the reins are being handed to… Tyson Bagent?

Just forfeit the season. 

29 – Broncos (1-5)

All we can do is point and laugh. My stomach hurts from laughing so much.

30 – Patriots (1-5)

Hey, at least it was close this time! And you can’t really blame Mac Jones for this one! All he did was throw an interception deep in opposing territory and take the game-losing sack in the endzone for a safety. See? Not his fault.

31 – Giants (1-5)

I considered bumping the Giants up this week (see: No. 8), but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Still, this team deserved to emerge victorious on Sunday night.

But, that doesn’t change the fact that they are still absolutely terrible. They only have themselves to blame for this loss. Brian Daboll needs to own up to his mistakes and stop projecting them onto his players. That’s just weird.

32 – Panthers (0-6)

*insert thumbs down emoji here*

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All stats taken from ESPN.