Post-Week 6 Power Rankings

An upset-littered week and continued parity across the league has led to one of the strangest Power Rankings yet.

Cover photo taken from Pride of Detroit.

1 – 49ers (5-1)

It wouldn’t feel quite fair to knock the 49ers to lose a game that they lost at the behest of poor refereeing and a missed field goal at the death after losing three of their best players, including the guy who currently has my MVP vote. It especially didn’t feel right considering that this is the NFL where great teams lose all the time, and a lot of other very good teams didn’t look the part on Sunday.

So, San Francisco remains on top, where they rightfully belong. I do think Brock Purdy’s worst performance yet could definitely be a cause for concern, but he was playing a defense that’s on a historic tear and, like I said, lost three of his best offensive players. He and the rest of the unit should be fine moving forward. But, that could change if these injuries start to pile up and derail them — a story that the Niners are definitely tired of hearing at this point. 

2 – Chiefs (5-1) 1

The Chiefs and Eagles have flip-flopped a good deal over these last few weeks. The main reason I’m bumping KC back up to the No. 2 slot is their defense, which has looked a lot better than Philly’s has. This is the best defense the Chiefs have had in the Patrick Mahomes era, and their dominance makes up for the shortcomings of Mahomes and the offense.

Those shortcomings continue to be a bit concerning, but it’s not like they’re the 2022 Broncos offense. Patrick just threw for 300 yards and Rashee Rice is starting to emerge as a potential WR1. The problem is finishing drives and limiting poor turnovers — something the Chiefs have had a lot of trouble with in recent weeks. I’d like to think they’re just throwing stuff at the wall because they’re bored. We won’t have our answer until they travel to Germany in a few weeks to take on the Dolphins. 

3 – Eagles (5-1) 1

Yikes. Losing to the Jets for the first time in franchise history thanks to three Jalen Hurts interceptions and incompetence in the defensive backfield against Zach Wilson is a bad look.

I’m not going to overreact though; the Jets defense is nothing short of elite, even without their top corners, and the Birds were due for a dud. But Hurts hasn’t been nearly as good as he was last year, especially when he plays defenses with a pulse, and although the defensive front is arguably the best in the league, the secondary continues to hold the unit back. Now, they’re dealing with injuries to make matters even worse.

Jalen and the offense will bounce back, but there are some cracks starting to show all over the place. With an absolute gauntlet of elite teams and offenses coming up, we’re about to see just what the 2023 Eagles are made of. 

4 – Dolphins (5-1)

There’s nothing new I can say about the Dolphins. I will say this though… yes, their offense is mesmerizing, but we need to examine their schedule up to this point. 

First was the Chargers: the worst secondary in football. Then, the Patriots: maybe the worst team in football with the worst starting quarterback in the league. Then came the Broncos: worst total defense, worst rushing defense, worst scoring defense and third worst passing defense in football. After starting 3-0, they played the only team with a pulse on their schedule thus far: the Bills, who absolutely decimated them on both sides of the ball. And the Bills aren’t even that good. After that humbling, they’ve beat up on the Giants and Panthers at home, two of the worst teams and offensive lines in the NFL.

So, to recap, Miami’s five wins are against the two worst scoring defenses in the league, the three worst rushing defenses in the league, two of the three worst passing defenses in the league, the second worst passing offense in the league, and the worst scoring offense in the league. 

Maybe, just maybe, this is a fugazi. Only time will tell. I think the Dolphins are a very good team. A great team, even. And they’re only going to get better once they get healthier. I’m just saying, we should be a bit cautious. 

5 – Lions (5-1)

In a week littered with such strange performances from teams at the top, I had half a mind to put the Lions at the No. 1 spot considering how dominant they looked in what we all expected to be a close game in Tampa.

With their top two running backs out, the offense didn’t miss a beat, in large part thanks to Amon-Ra St. Brown’s monster return to the field. Jared Goff continues to play like an MVP candidate behind what might just be the best offensive line in the league. But, as I’ve been saying all year long, the most impressive trend in Detroit is the play of the defense. The Lions are one of only two teams in the league with a top seven offense and defense. The other? San Francisco.

This team is elite. They might just be the best in the NFC right now, if not the league. Considering how wide open the NFL looks right now, who knows what 2023 has in store for the Lions?

6 – Jaguars (4-2)

Death. Taxes. The Jaguars beating the Colts in Jacksonville.

There’s not a whole lot I can say about that performance, other than that it was more dominant than I expected. Travis Etienne continues to look like one of the best running backs in the league, Trevor Lawrence keeps on doing his thing, and the defense still looks better and better by the week.

I understand that they just played a below average team with a backup quarterback, but considering how the Jags looked in their first matchup with the Colts and some of the lows we’ve seen out of them thus far, it inspires a lot of confidence to see them ball out the way they have in recent weeks. 

7 – Ravens (4-2) 2

See what happens when Lamar Jackson gets some help from his surrounding cast? It’s that easy!

Sunday’s win across the pond showcased the exact formula that Baltimore needs to execute week in and week out to keep on winning games: help Lamar enough and let the defense do the rest. Considering the talent level on both sides of the ball, it should not be as hard as they made it look through the first month or so. The Ravens need to keep this up though, as the rest of the division continues to nip at their heels. 

8 – Bills (4-2) 1

The Bills are the only team to move down after a win this week. I feel like I don’t really need to explain myself here, but just in case you needed some evidence, here it is:

Buffalo was outgained by the Giants through the air and on the ground. Buffalo lost the turnover battle. Buffalo lost the time of possession battle. Buffalo didn’t score until the fourth quarter against a bottom five scoring defense. By all accounts, Buffalo should have lost at home as two-touchdown favorites in a primetime game against perhaps the worst team in the NFL, in large part thanks to offensive shortcomings.

I’ll give credit to Josh Allen for pulling this team out of the dirt and leading them to victory, but it should never, ever have been that close. The Giants had the ball on the goal line twice and came away with 0 points. Just a field goal on both of those possessions would have led to the upset. The game marked the second consecutive week where the Bills had just 7 points with five minutes left in the game. There are real issues with this offense, and although the defense had an okay game, they’re clearly reeling from their losses due to injury. If all of this continues to persist, it’ll be hard to have much faith in the Bills moving forward. 

9 – Cowboys (4-2) 1

After last week’s embarrassment, the Cowboys played perhaps the most predictable game of all time on Monday night, picking up a narrow win over the Chargers. But, two things stood out to me about their performance: the play of Dak Prescott and the defensive dominance. 

Both make sense when you consider the context. Dak was facing the worst pass defense in the league, and the defense was due for a bounce-back night after getting tossed around the previous week by the 49ers. But to see it all come together like that was a positive sign.

What’s not a positive sign, however, is how that only led to a three-point win against a pretty “meh” team in the Chargers, who practically handed them the game. My biggest takeaway from these last two weeks is that Dallas is going to be in close games against any team with a semblance of a pulse, and if they match up with a truly elite team, then it’s not going to be pretty. 

10 – Browns (3-2) 1o

I’ve admittedly been underrating the Browns all year long compared to a lot of other Power Rankings. My main rationale for that was that, despite their defensive dominance, I didn’t really buy into their offense. And although I still have to be convinced, I have no choice but to put some respect on Cleveland after Sunday’s huge win over the undefeated 49ers. 

It’s not just that the defense is dominant, by the way. They’re historically great. They’re statistically the best defense that the NFL has seen in 50 years. 50 years! Only giving up 200 yards per game is absolutely incredible. That unit deserves every game ball, but especially Sunday’s, as they completely decimated a 49ers offense which had cut through every other opponent. Yes, Deebo Samuel and Christian McCaffrey weren’t a part of the equation for a large majority of the game, but they still deserve their flowers.

This is the type of defense to completely carry a team through a season, no matter how lackluster the offense is. If they can beat the Niners with P.J. Walker starting at QB, then who knows what else they’re capable of? 

11 – Bengals (3-3) 6

I’m still not going to rush to any conclusions and declare the Bengals as “back” because their offense is simply too inconsistent. This is a big jump, but it’s not because Joe Burrow and Ja’Marr Chase necessarily lit up the scoreboard again. It’s because the Cincinnati defense continues to come up huge in all of the biggest moments. 

By all accounts, it’s a daily middle-of-the-pack defense, and that’s reflected in the statistics. They just get stops and force turnovers at all the most opportune moments. They completely shut down the Seahawks in the redzone on back-to-back drives to seal Sunday’s win. The Bengals had no business winning that game, which shows in the box score, but the defense ensured that they did. And that was absolutely massive as they’re now back to .500 and still just one game out of first place.

Now, they head into a bye against a massive stretch with games consecutive games against San Francisco and Buffalo. If they win one or both of those games, then maybe I’ll say the Bengals are back. 

12 – Rams (3-3)

Predictably, getting Cooper Kupp back completely elevated this already elite offense to new, but familiar heights. There’s not much that needs to be said about that.

The defense played what was probably their best game of the year, which was an inspiring sight. But, they were also playing the Cardinals, and the wheels are starting to come off their offense. So, I’m taking it with a grain of salt.

Simply put, the Rams did what they were supposed to do on Sunday. Nothing more, nothing less. For that, they stay put. I’m going to need to see a lot more out of them against much better opposition to get a better read on them. 

13 – Seahawks (3-2) 5

I feel like I’m being very harsh to the Seahawks here. Maybe it’s deserved considering how they completely threw away Sunday’s win. The way I see it, I’m giving them room to redeem themselves. 

Neither side of the ball looked poor by any means on Sunday as the offense racked up yards at will and the defense got up to their usual lockdown ways, especially in the secondary. They outgained the Bengals by nearly 160 yards, forced one more turnover than Cincy, and held the ball for six more minutes. But, as I said above, the two late redzone stops completely buried them. 

So, by all accounts the Seahawks deserved to win. Still, considering the way it played out in addition to the performances of some other teams in this proverbial tier of the Power Rankings, I had to knock them down this far. 

14 – Texans (3-3) 4

In a season with no standout MVP candidates other than Christian McCaffrey, are were sure C.J. Stroud isn’t in the thick of the race? The rookie signal-caller continues to be the best player in his class, using his precision accuracy and veteran anticipation to lead his team to victories.

The Texans have already matched their win total from a year ago, and it only took six games. That’s a remarkable achievement for this franchise, and it’s all thanks to the former Buckeye. Their defense also continues to improve — they may give up a lot of yards, but they step up when their number is called.

As it stands, the Texans have a long way to go before contending with Jacksonville for a division title. But I love absolutely everything that’s going on in Houston. And it’s only going to keep getting better. 

15 – Jets (3-3) 9

The Jets very well might have the best culture in the NFL. That culture is leading directly to wins. It’s honestly so much fun to watch. 

This team had no business beating the Eagles — for the first time in franchise history, might I add — with Zach Wilson starting under center behind a beat-up offensive line and with the secondary being littered with injuries. But they did thanks to an inspiring fourth quarter performance. The defense is going to get healthier, and for all his faults, Zach Wilson is playing some decent ball, which means more wins are coming for the Jets.

This was the type of win to completely turn a season around. They are going to be in the thick of this Wild Card race. 

16 – Chargers (2-3) 5

I don’t know what to say about the Chargers anymore. The feeling that’s most prominent when it comes to them is concern.

I think Justin Herbert’s hand injury is a bigger problem than we realize, I think Austin Ekeler being largely ineffective in his return is troubling, and that defense is just so damn bad.

Combine all of that with the fact that the Chargers are perennially incapable of winning big or close games and you have a team that’s destined for a very, very mediocre season. 

17 – Steelers (3-2) 2

The Steelers had themselves a bye week ahead of a very interesting matchup out west against the Rams on Sunday in what should be a great test for their defense. More on that tomorrow. 

18 – Packers (2-3) 3

The Packers’ bye week probably couldn’t have come at a better time as Jordan Love tries to bounce back from last week’s miserable Monday night performance and Aaron Jones continues to try and come back from his injury. 

The good news for Green Bay is that they’re facing Denver this week in what figures to be a get-right spot for Love and whoever lines up at running back as the Broncos give up the most total and rushing yards per game of any team in the league. 

19 – Buccaneers (3-2) 6

For the second consecutive home game, the Buccaneers laid a complete dud against one of the NFL’s elites. But for this one to come off a bye week is pretty telling.

This is a team that’s going to beat all of the bad teams on its schedule, and plenty of the mediocre ones. They’re going to put together some eye-opening games, like they did in New Orleans a few weeks ago. They might be good enough to win this division or fight for a Wild Card spot. But they’re really nothing special. 

20 – Saints (3-3) 4

The Saints might just be the most infuriating watch in the NFL right now. They’re just such a nothing team. They put up completely empty stats which mean nothing by the fourth quarter because that’s when they forget how to move the football. The defense is great until it’s time to actually be great, where they refuse to. Their only convincing performance came against what might be the worst offense the NFL has seen in years.

It’s not that the Saints are puzzling. It’s that they’re painfully boring and impossible to care about. They do nothing that makes anyone care about their games, and their games are all the same. It’s mind-numbing. 

21 – Commanders (3-3) 2

Oh look, a win! I almost forgot what these looked like.

Here’s the skinny: it feels good to win, but that was not a very good performance by any means, and I still don’t feel good about this team at all.

Yes, Sam Howell was slicing and dicing to the tune of his first three-touchdown game. But he also kept on taking bad sacks and remains on pace to be the most-sacked quarterback in a season in NFL history. Yes, the defense nabbed three game-clinching interceptions. But they were playing what is probably the worst quarterback in the NFL who handed the game to them on a silver platter.

At the end of the day, we still were outgained by over 200 yards while putting up less than 200 yards ourselves, we held the ball for 13 less minutes, and realistically had no business winning. It’s not a sustainable formula, and one that certainly won’t fly against teams with better quarterbacks than Desmond Ridder. That’s essentially each of the 30 other teams in the NFL. 

22 – Falcons (3-3) 8

I told you so.

The defense is good. The skill position players are more than good.

The quarterback is anything but.

See: No. 21.

23 – Raiders (3-3) 2

The Raiders are kind of like the Saints in the sense that they’re also a “nothing” team, but for some reason, I enjoy watching them far more than New Orleans. At least Vegas keeps things entertaining.

Despite consecutive wins to get back to .500, I’m still not very impressed by this team, and another injury to Jimmy Garoppolo makes it much harder to be. I also hate how Josh Jacobs and Davante Adams continue to be ghosts in this offense. But hey, it’s working. 

24 – Colts (3-3) 3

The news that Anthony Richardson’s season is over is actually so sad. I loved watching the rookie work, but shutting him down is the right decision. He has proven that he has the talent to be the centerpiece of this rebuild, and the Colts know that his health is the top priority. I just hope that he comes back stronger and better than ever. That’s going to be one scary sight for the league. 

So, Garnder Minshew will be the main man in Indianapolis for the rest of the year. He might have led the Colts to some early wins, but Sunday’s showing was his worst yet, and this team might be in for a long few months.

If you ask me, their best course of action is to keep losing and bring home a kid with a name that’s very familiar to Colts fans everywhere to pair up with Richardson next year. Just an idea. 

25 – Vikings (2-4) 1

Meh.

Oh, I almost forgot…

Regression to the mean. 11-0 in one-score games in 2022. 2-4 in such games in 2023. Crazy to think last year’s Vikes would be the NFL’s lone unbeaten right now!

26 – Titans (2-4) 4

God, this team is so boring. I don’t envy any of you who woke up early to watch the Titans do nothing offensively for three hours on Sunday morning. I truly never want anything to do with this team. 

Now, to make matters worse, Ryan Tannehill is hurt once again. I know Malik Willis relieved him on Sunday, but if I were the Titans, I’d go ahead and start Will Levis after the bye if Tannehill can’t go. You picked him in the second round for a reason, and he’s more pro-ready than Willis, somehow. Let’s see what the kid can do. 

27 – Cardinals (1-5)

The wheels are starting to fall off the Cardinals, especially offensively. The injury to James Conner has made them completely ineffective on that side of the ball as they didn’t even reach the endzone on Sunday. The defense also continues to struggle against elite passing attacks as Matthew Stafford and Cooper Kupp completely cut them up.

Are the Cardinals still frisky? Probably. But that’s about it. Wins are going to be a commodity from here on out.  

28 – Bears (1-5)

Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse for the Bears, Justin Fields completely messes up his throwing hand. Now the reins are being handed to… Tyson Bagent?

Just forfeit the season. 

29 – Broncos (1-5)

All we can do is point and laugh. My stomach hurts from laughing so much.

30 – Patriots (1-5)

Hey, at least it was close this time! And you can’t really blame Mac Jones for this one! All he did was throw an interception deep in opposing territory and take the game-losing sack in the endzone for a safety. See? Not his fault.

31 – Giants (1-5)

I considered bumping the Giants up this week (see: No. 8), but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Still, this team deserved to emerge victorious on Sunday night.

But, that doesn’t change the fact that they are still absolutely terrible. They only have themselves to blame for this loss. Brian Daboll needs to own up to his mistakes and stop projecting them onto his players. That’s just weird.

32 – Panthers (0-6)

*insert thumbs down emoji here*


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 5 Power Rankings

After another wild week of football, there are a plethora of ups and downs in an ever-shifting list, including some major changes in the top ten.

Cover photo taken from Bleeding Green Nation.

1 – 49ers (5-0)

I told you so. 

The 49ers have established themselves as the best team in the NFL by a country mile, and it’s now very easy for everyone to see why. They have football’s equivalent of a superteam, they haven’t lost a regular season game in nearly a year, they still haven’t lost a game that Brock Purdy has started and finished, they have scored 30-plus in each game this year while giving up the least points per game in the league… the list goes on and on and on. 

You just can’t stop these guys. You can only pray to slow them down. 

2 – Eagles (5-0) 2

I have seen enough from the Eagles to feel comfortable putting them above the Chiefs for the time being. This team clearly hasn’t lost a beat from last season, being completely dominant through five regular season games. 

While I’m still not crazy about their secondary — which is the eighth-worst in the league — their run defense is incredible, leading the NFL in rushing yards allowed per game. Jalen Carter is an absolute menace on the inside, and the front is deep and talented enough to stifle teams all game long. The offense is only getting scarier as A.J. Brown continues to dominate and D’Andre Swift keeps getting better at providing a complement in the run game to Jalen Hurts. 

The Birds and the Niners are simply on a collision course with one another that will come to a head on December 3rd in Philly, and probably in late January as well. We might as well just fast forward to that now. 

3 – Chiefs (4-1)

There’s really not much I can say about the Chiefs at this point. If nothing else, they’ve been quite consistent through five games. Patrick Mahomes is amazing, the receivers are still figuring it out, something is really holding Travis Kelce back, and the defense has been pretty good. That’s all there is to it.

Kelce’s new ankle injury is something to monitor moving forward, but the dude is a warrior. He should be good to go. I don’t really think Kansas City needs him in the next few weeks, though. The schedule is only getting easier. 

4 – Dolphins (4-1) 1

Sunday’s win was a return to form for the Dolphins, but I don’t think we necessarily learned anything. We just saw Miami blow out a terrible team despite some pretty poor mistakes from Tua Tagovailoa. I don’t think that’s a cause for concern — Tua usually bounces back, and I think this offense is simply too good for that to become a trend.

However, I think the injury to De’Von Achane could be tough to overcome. Raheem Mostert is obviously a great option for an RB1, but Achane provided a level of speed and athleticism that really opened things up for the rest of the offense, including Mostert. I’m very interested to see what this offense looks like without him. 

5 – Lions (4-1) 4

I really didn’t want to take too much out of a blowout of the worst team in the NFL, but man the Lions look better and better every week. Without Amon-Ra St. Brown and Jahmyr Gibbs, they put up arguably their best offensive effort of the season. Is that not a horrifying truth?

What continues to impress me with Detroit is their defense, which now gives up the sixth-least yards per game in the league. Like I said, they’re only getting better. Now, the NFC North is clearly theirs to lose, and I can’t wait to see what awaits them once the calendar flips to January.

6 – Jaguars (3-2) 6

All it took was a trip to London to get the Jaguars season back on track. They’ve played their best two games of the year in England, and I now have my confidence in them restored, especially after how badly they beat the Bills on Sunday morning. They completely dominated in the trenches, allowing Travis Etienne to dominate, Trevor Lawrence continued his accurate and efficient ways, and the defense locked up a Bills offense that just looked like world beaters against Miami.

Maybe Buffalo’s collapse was more of an emotional crash after that win, but I’m choosing to give a ton of credit to Jacksonville, who can hopefully keep this level of play up now that they’re coming back home. 

7 – Bills (3-2) 5

The first month of the season is over, which means it’s time for the Bills to come back to earth. I don’t know why we’re all not used to this by now. It has become far too predictable.

The box score would have you believe that Josh Allen and the offense was just fine on Sunday, but I don’t really think that was the case. They were stymied almost all game long by the Jags defense, and some garbage time fireworks made the performance look respectable. Despite the struggles, I’d have to believe the offense is good enough to be just fine.

However, I think Buffalo is in a ton of trouble with all of their injuries on the defensive side of the ball. With Tre White and Matt Milano now out for the year after devastating leg injuries, I think it’s a real possibility that the defense really starts to struggle, especially as the schedule ramps up down the stretch. The good news is that they have cupcake after cupcake for the next month or so to figure out those issues. But it’s certainly something to monitor.

8 – Seahawks (3-1)

The Seahawks were one of the first teams with a bye this season ahead of a fascinating matchup against the Bengals, who have seemed to find their stride. I’m very intrigued by how that’s going to play out, but I’ll save that for Thursday. 

9 – Ravens (3-2) 2

The Ravens may have collapsed in rather embarrassing fashion on Sunday, but I honestly don’t think they deserved to lose. Lamar Jackson was sold time and time again by his receivers in a performance that was reminiscent of the Chiefs in Week 1. Like I said then, if those receivers made just a fraction of the catches they should have, Baltimore probably wins the game.

Still, that’s a cause for concern. This receiving core is nothing close to what it was hyped up to be, and if they keep selling Lamar, we could see more games like Sunday’s. But I’d have to think it won’t look that bad again, and the defense is more than good enough to stay afloat. 

10 – Cowboys (3-2) 4

In any other week, the Cowboys are clearly the Team of Shame. Luckily for them, their rivals one-upped them a few days prior. That being said, I will still take this time to take a victory lap and laugh at the Cowboys.

I warned everyone that we might have been looking at fool’s gold with Dallas, who looked dominant against dreadful teams like the Giants, Jets, and Patriots. I always said the 49ers would be the litmus test, and that I never believed they’d be up for it. Lo and behold: a complete and utter dismantling at the hands of an actually elite team that serves as the hump that the Cowboys simply can never get over. And that was the worst loss to them that I’ve ever seen. Dak Prescott played what might’ve been the worst game of his life, the offense couldn’t move the ball, and the supposedly otherworldly defense was sliced and diced by Brock Purdy and company. It was an embarrassment of the highest order — one that we should come to expect from a team as unserious as this one.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is why you don’t let your star pass-rusher have a solo podcast where he talks about his team’s claim to a Super Bowl after one great game against Daniel freakin’ Jones. 

11 – Chargers (2-2) 1

I’d argue that the Chargers won the bye week as they should finally be getting Austin Ekeler back ahead of a huge Monday nighter against the Cowboys.

And I mean that this time. He’s the one who said it, not me. 

12 – Rams (2-3) 1

Despite a tough loss on Sunday, I still feel good about the Rams. The defense continues to be so-so, but the re-addition of Cooper Kupp to the lineup has made this passing offense really, really scary, just as I predicted it would. Him and Puka Nacua are going to be very difficult to stop moving forward, and that alone gives me confidence.

I still don’t think this team is anything crazy — they’re an above average to middle-of-the-pack squad that will be in a lot of fun, tight games. But I think their offensive talent puts them at the top of that proverbial tier of teams. 

13 – Buccaneers (3-1) 1

The Buccaneers had the week off ahead of a very fun matchup with the Lions in which they will be rocking the Creamsicles. That alone makes it my most anticipated game of the week. 

14 – Falcons (3-2) 5

Are the Falcons back? Is Desmond Ridder actually a real quarterback? Is the race for the NFC South title back on? Maybe. Maybe not. But I was pretty impressed with Atlanta’s resolve down the stretch on Sunday against Houston. I never would have expected Ridder to lead a game-winning drive, especially after C.J. Stroud decimated the Falcons defense to take a late lead. But he did, and maybe that’s the type of drive to turn things around him. Only time will tell on that front.

Regardless, this defense is still solid, Bijan Robinson is still awesome, and we’re starting to see some contributions poured in from guys like Drake London and Kyle Pitts, which is a huge positive moving forward. 

15 – Packers (2-3) 2

Did I victory lap my Packers/Jordan Love takes too soon? I sure as hell hope not. But Monday night’s disaster in the desert certainly made it seem that way.

Love was absolutely abhorrent from start to finish, throwing three terrible interceptions without even tossing a touchdown — something that Aaron Rodgers neverdid in over 220 starts in green and yellow. That’s not a great sign. The good news is that Green Bay’s defense was fine and did a great job of limiting Davante Adams from hurting them in his revenge game. Love and the offense simply let them down and were the sole reason the Packers lost that game.

One or two more of those performances, and I might have to eat a lot of crow. 

16 – Saints (3-2) 5

I’m not going to make too much of a blowout of arguably the worst team in football, but the Saints were mighty impressive on Sunday in a game I inexplicably picked them to lose.

The defense is ridiculously good, Alvin Kamara continues to elevate the offense, which isn’t great, but is slowly getting better. If they can turn into a great unit to complement the elite defense, then New Orleans has a real shot of winning this division, which Vegas thinks is theirs to lose.

I disagree with the books, but I’m also the guy who said Mac Jones was going to beat this team. So what do I know?

17 – Bengals (2-3) 5

I’m not going to overreact, I’m not going to overreact, I’m not going to overreact… but it’s damn hard not to.

What do you want me to say? Seeing Joe Burrow and Ja’Marr Chase get back to their old ways was more than enough to restore my faith in the Bengals. But it’s not necessarily the stats they put up — it’s more of how it happened. Burrow was more mobile on Sunday than he was in the previous four weeks combined, and Chase lined up all over the place and ran circles around Arizona’s defense with a diverse route tree no matter where he was. That’s exactly the type of shot in the arm that this offense has needed for a month now. Combine that with another good defensive performance, and there’s plenty to like about where Cincinnati is headed.

But I need to see this more consistently to bump them higher and higher. I am erring on the side of caution… for now. 

18 – Texans (2-3)

There’s not much I can say about the Texans this week. I really hoped they emerged victorious in Atlanta, but I still saw plenty to like and not much to dislike. C.J. Stroud wasn’t as flashy or explosive as he had been in recent weeks, but that has a lot more to do with the great, sticky man coverage of the Falcons. Despite that, he still played a clean game and led what should have been the game-winning drive, which culminated in a gorgeous touchdown throw to Dalton Schultz.

There are some pretty good secondaries left on the schedule, so we’ll see what Houston can muster up moving forward. Until I see Stroud and the offense put up a truly poor performance, I don’t see any reason to bump this team down.  

19 – Steelers (3-2) 1

Against all odds, the Steelers won a football game in large part thanks to one single great offensive play. Kenny Pickett’s gorgeous deep ball to George Pickens to take the lead was truly something to behold, as was most of the rest of the game for Pittsburgh, mostly defensively. They got away with a lot due to the incompetence of the Ravens’ pass-catchers, but they still made huge plays when it mattered most, including an endzone interception for rookie corner Joey Porter Jr. and a game-sealing strip sack of Lamar Jackson.

That’s exactly what the Steelers are: they’re good enough to win games if they make one or two plays on offense and let their defense do the rest. That’s what won them games against Cleveland, Las Vegas, and now Baltimore. But, when that doesn’t happen, which we saw against San Francisco and Houston, then it looks disastrous. 

20 – Browns (2-2) 4

I feel bad for bumping the Browns down so much during their bye week, but that’s just how the chips fell. It doesn’t help that they’re being really weird about this whole Deshaun Watson shoulder injury. They better hope and pray that they don’t have to trot Dorian Thompson-Robinson back out there when the 49ers roll into town. That would be quite ugly.

21 – Colts (3-2) 4

The Colts are truly fascinating. In each of their three wins, Anthony Richardson has either exited early or not played at all due to injury. Winning football games with a backup quarterback is usually the sign of a pretty good team, or at the very least a pretty good culture.

We’ll see how long they can keep that up as Richardson heads to the injured reserve with a shoulder injury and Gardner Minshew handles the reins for the next month or so. But with a constantly improving offense featuring a suddenly dynamic one-two punch at running back with Jonathan Taylor’s return and Zack Moss’ random dominance and a solid group of pass-catchers, I think Indy will stay afloat. 

22 – Titans (2-3) 7

The roller coaster continues! Whee!

As I’ve said repeatedly in the past several weeks, this is getting really annoying. But, at the very least, the predictability of the Titans makes them much, much easier to assess. I’ll see you all next week when they get bumped back up seven spots!

23 – Commanders (2-3) 6

Thursday night’s debacle easily ranks as one of the ten worst losses I have witnessed in two decades as a fan of this team. I’ve exhausted myself in rants and emotional distress in the week that has followed, so once again, I will keep this nice and simple:

When you are coming off back-to-back tough losses — including a 37-3 embarrassment at home — and have given up over 30 points in all but one game this season, then implore your fans to come out in droves for your lone primetime game of the year — which turns into a sellout — against the worst team in the NFL who hasn’t won a game in nearly a full calendar year and is going through more dysfunction than any other team in professional sports — including a 38-point loss and a blown 21-point second half lead on top of a defensive coordinator fire after an FBI raid, just to name a few incidents — just to get absolutely embarrassed by giving up 40 points and an all-time performance to a single wide receiver thanks to the large incompetence of not just the defense as a whole — which is being led by a man who has no remote idea what on earth he is doing — but the wiry-thin and small corner that you deliberately drafted in the first round over several other actually capable prospects, en route to a 20-point, season-derailing loss in which the clearly incapable, ineffective and honestly straight up dreadful head coach doesn’t talk to the team at halftime or at any point during the game, you quite simply become the easiest Team of Shame of all time. In fact, you should arguably bear that burden for the rest of the season for such a disastrous, shameful humiliation. 

…and exhale.  

24 – Jets (2-3) 3

I’m not entirely sure what to make out of the Jets after one of the wackiest, funniest games I’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing. But some things are clearly apparent here.

Breece Hall is amazing, Dalvin Cook is dreadful, the offensive line is going to continue to get worse, Zach Wilson clearly has some juice but is probably going to lose you more games than he wins you, and the defense might have some rough patches, but they’re still fantastic overall.

I’d say that, when you stir all of those in one pot, you have a five-to-seven-win team. 

25 – Raiders (2-3) 3

You know what Monday night’s win was? It was the Raiders’ patented win early in the season where we think to ourselves: “Is this team actually legit?” The answer is obviously no. That win almost always comes against a team who actually turns out to be not so great.

As I’ve said all year long, I like a lot of pieces with this team, but the Raiders as a whole are absolutely nothing to write home about. They got handed Monday’s win on a silver platter — something that likely won’t happen to them or the remainder of this season.

If you choose to somehow be moved by this team, then you do you. But they can’t fool me. I am familiar with their game. 

26 – Vikings (1-4) 3

Regression to the mean. 11-0 in one-score games in 2022. 1-4 in such games in 2023. 

We’re reaching a point where that’s probably the only thing I need to say about the Vikings on a weekly basis. I have a feeling that I won’t have to in the weeks that follow considering that Justin Jefferson is headed to the injured reserve with a non-contact hamstring injury suffered on Sunday thanks to US Bank Stadium’s turf. Thanks for that, NFL! I really didn’t want to watch the most exciting young receiver of the decade every Sunday!

Jefferson’s absence means that Minnesota is staring down the barrel of a string of tough losses. It might be time to blow it all up.  

27 – Cardinals (1-4) 3

The 2023 Arizona Cardinals in one word? Frisky.

But that’s about it. The Cards are showing that they’re simply a team that’s going to fight, but still lose at the end of the day. With James Conner headed to the injured reserve, they might just turn into a team that straight up loses games without even putting up a fight. It’s going to start getting a lot tougher in the desert for Jonathan Gannon’s bus-riders. 

28 – Bears (1-4) 4

I don’t want to talk about it.

I’ll just say this: good on the Bears for finally getting in the win column, and good for Justin Fields and D.J. Moore to do all that. It was about damn time. I just wish they chose a different game. Literally any other game. 

29 – Broncos (1-4)

As horrible as my team’s situation is, I relish in the fact that it’s not nearly as bad as the Broncos’. I truly cannot fathom completing one of the worst trades in recent memory, then giving up a first round pick for a head coach who said that the previous skipper pulled off one of the worst jobs in history only for that man to return to town and beat him down. That is so embarrassing that it’s hilarious.

Like, extremely hilarious. 

30 – Patriots (1-4) 4

The Patriots are by far the worst team in the AFC, and there’s really only one thing you need to know to back that up: this team has been outscored 72-3 in the last two games. After Bill Belichick suffered the worst loss of his career in Dallas, he came back to Foxboro and suffered his worst home loss as the head man in New England. 

I definitely don’t think it’s his fault. What the hell is any team supposed to do when Mac Jones is its quarterback and its defense is as banged up as it is? There’s simply nothing that the Pats can do at this point except tank. The only thing they have to look forward to is next year. 

31 – Giants (1-4)

It has gone from bad to worse to a lot worse to unsalvageable for the Giants.

A predictable blowout loss to the Dolphins is fine, but what’s not fine is this offensive line’s continued incompetence and injuries continuing to stack up across the board. They just have no healthy players, and the ones that are healthy or at least close to healthy are horrible. There’s a real chance that the Giants have to field their B-team in Buffalo on Sunday night.

At this point, I don’t know if their B-team can beat Bishop Sycamore. 

32 – Panthers (0-5) 2

Now the NFL’s lone winless team, the Panthers have unfortunately been relegated to the bottom of the Power Rankings, giving us our second team in the basement thus far in 2023. And it’s honestly just sad to see. Injuries and extremely poor play across the board has simply doomed this team. And they don’t even have their first round pick or their former stud WR1 to compensate for that.

This calendar year has simply been a comedy of errors for Carolina, and that doesn’t figure to stop any time soon. 


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 4 Power Rankings

A wacky week has caused major shakeups as the first month of the season comes to a crazy close.

Cover photo taken from The Boston Globe.

1 – 49ers (4-0) 1

There’s nothing I can say about the Niners that I haven’t been saying for a month now.

This is the most complete, most dominant team in the NFL and it’s not remotely close. They’re just leagues above everyone else right now. The offense is unstoppable with 30+ points scored in each game, and the defense continues to be one of the best in the league.

As it currently stands, they’re just going to mow down their opponents all year long. It’s hard to see them slowing down any time soon. 

2 – Bills (3-1) 4

I may have picked the Bills to win on Sunday, but I never imagined it’d look like that. That might have been the best game of the Josh Allen era and was probably Allen’s finest performance to date.

The star QB let the world know the AFC East is still his division with a 21-of-25, 320 yard, 4 touchdown, perfect passer rating outing with a rushing score to boot. Buffalo dominated the NFL’s hottest team on both sides of the ball with an inspired performance that had me considering putting them atop the Power Rankings.

I’m not going to do that just yet, but I’m officially sold on this team moving forward. They have proven themselves as the current class of the AFC, although we should all be wary of the Chiefs, who always end up proving that title belongs to them.

3 – Chiefs (3-1)

I don’t have much to say about Kansas City’s relative dud on Sunday night other than the fact that I’ve never seen Patrick Mahomes make some of the very strange mistakes he did throwing the ball. He lofted several interceptions right to defenders, which he never even comes close to doing 99 percent of the time. He was outplayed by Zach Wilson for crying out loud.

It was extremely strange, but I don’t think we’re going to see something like that again anytime soon. It was likely a product of the Jets playing great, sticky defense. But it should be monitored as a potential cause for concern moving forward. 

4 – Eagles (4-0)

I don’t really want to talk about this team, but I’m not going to be petty.

The Eagles continue to prove how great they can be offensively, with an ability to hurt you in a million different ways. On Sunday, it was the AJ Brown show for the first time this year as the star receiver went absolutely nuclear, torching rookie corner Emmanuel Forbes Jr. in a “welcome to the f—— show” type of performance. Jalen Hurts did his thing, D’Andre Swift continued to flash out of the backfield, and the offensive line dominated in every aspect against a very good Commanders front.

I still have plenty of problems with this Philly defense, especially in the secondary, but it hasn’t lost them a game yet. It’s only a matter of time before it does. 

5 – Dolphins (3-1) 4

Again, I did not think the Dolphins would win on Sunday. But I didn’t expect their trip back to Earth to be a crash landing.

Despite some highlights and good numbers, Miami was throrougly dominated in every aspect on a very humbling day upstate. You could make the argument that perhaps the team needed this reality check after being in la la land for the last several weeks, but there’s never an excuse for a team that talented to get thumped the way they did. They went from being the talk of the league to the third best team in their conference and second best in their division.

They’ll be fine, and they’ll get back to their flashy ways immediately considering they play the Giants next week. But their stay at the top is over, and it was far more brief than they would have liked. 

6 – Cowboys (3-1) 1

The Cowboys did exactly what they were supposed to do on Sunday: they thoroughly dominated a lifeless, anemic Patriots at home. I’ll give them credit — it’s hard to win any NFL game by that margin with that level of a performance, especially defensively. But it’s what I expected from Dallas in that game, so I’m not going to sing too many of their praises.

As I’ve been saying, this week’s primetime matchup in San Francisco will tell us what the Cowboys are made of. 

7 – Ravens (3-1) 2

Lamar Jackson is a bad man. That’s really all that needs to be said.

The star quarterback was simply sensational on Sunday with four total touchdowns — a pair on the ground and through the air. The Ravens offense was nearly infallible and the defense was even better, limiting the Browns to just 3 points at home.

I have to take it with a grain of salt considering Cleveland was starting backup quarterback Dorian Thompson-Robinson, who clearly was not ready for an NFL game. But I don’t want to take anything away from Baltimore, who put together what might have been the most dominant performance of the week to establish themselves as the powerhouse of the AFC North.  

8 – Seahawks (3-1) 1

Seattle might have put together the best defensive performance I’ve ever seen on Monday night with 11 sacks, two turnovers — including a 97-yard pick six — and a fumble recovery. Regardless of how bad the opposing offense was, those are otherworldly numbers.

The Seahawks offense was thoroughly underwhelming, but that doesn’t matter at this point. The defense has been the question mark for much of the season, and they just put together the type of game that will fuel them for weeks. First round selection Devon Witherspoon has officially made his mark, and dudes are hooping all over the field.

The offense still has a bit to figure out, especially what they’re doing (or not doing) with Jaxon Smith-Njigba, but I feel as confident as ever in the Seahawks. This team is flat out dangerous. 

9 – Lions (3-1) 1

I owe the Lions a bit of an apology. I have continued to undermine them, and they have continued to prove me wrong. Consider me fully sold on this team now.

This is as complete of a team as there is in the NFL, and they are completely dominant in the trenches. They play physical defense and they completely beat you up on offense. They can hurt you in a plethora of ways, and now they get their vertical threat back in Jameson Williams.

The Lions are only getting better, and the NFC North is now theirs to lose. I think they can only go up from here. 

10 – Chargers (2-2) 4

I think the Chargers are physically incapable of playing a normal football game. Even when it looks like they’re completely dominating a vastly inferior opponent who is starting a rookie quarterback who looks completely overwhelmed by the moment, they find ways to completely mess it up and nearly lose. On Sunday, it was a flurry of untimely turnovers and extremely strange mismanagement of Justin Herbert after he fractured his damn finger. But, some key takeaways of their own, a whopping six Khalil Mack sacks, and common Herbert late-game heroics got LA to .500 on the year and trending upwards.

I still don’t really know what to make of this team right now, but I know that as long as #10 is slinging the rock around the yard, they should be in every game they play.

11 – Rams (2-2) 7

The Rams continue to impress me in a multitude of ways. This week, it was getting off to a torrid start and shoring up when the going got tough to come away with a clutch, hard-fought overtime win on the road, which is never easy in this league. Puka Nacua was obviously the star of the show once again, who continues to play like not just one of the best rookies, but best receivers in the league with his nose for the football and playmaking ability. This offense might look very spooky once Cooper Kupp returns, which might just be this week (at least this is his first eligible week to return from IR).

I obviously would’ve liked to see LA close the game out in regulation, but on all other fronts, I was very pleased with their performance. It’s time for me to start putting some respect on them. 

12 – Jaguars (2-2) 1

The Jags got back on track in Andy’s Room with a nice win, but it still wasn’t exactly what I had been hoping to see out of them. The defense balled out, but they were practically spoon-fed turnovers by Desmond Ridder. The offense was fine thanks to the efficiency of Trevor Lawrence, but the running game remains invisible. That’s a concern.

Jacksonville simply still is yet to put together a complete performance this year. I need to see one out of them if they want to be considered with the elites of the league. 

13 – Packers (2-2) 3

The Packers played a pretty terrible half of football before staging a mini-comeback and then going flat again to close things out on Thursday night. As a guy who has been singing this team’s praises since the summer, that was a pretty bad look for me.

The offense was completely invisible in the first half as Jordan Love repeatedly handed the ball to the Lions and the running game was nonexistent. Love had a better second half, but it was far too little too late. There’s only so much you can do when you bury yourself in a 20-point hole so early in the game. I’m more concerned with Green Bay’s defense, which straight up looked slow, like it didn’t even want to be there. It’s a talented unit that should never play a game that poor, and could definitely be a cause for concern. 

14 – Buccaneers (3-1) 7

It’s still very early, but it might be time for me to start eating crow with Baker and the Bucs. I had no hopes for them this year. I discredited their first two wins because of how poor the opposition was. But for them to go into New Orleans and beat the Saints while snapping their streak of not allowing 20 points all while Tampa’s own defense completely dominated? That’s something to be impressed with.

Baker once again cooked with his first three touchdown performance since the 2020 Wild Card in Pittsburgh, making light work of the best secondary he has faced this year by a huge margin. It’s getting to the point where I’m starting to believe this is sustainable. And with the defense playing like it is, combined with how horrible the rest of this division is, who knows how far that can take Tampa in 2023? 

15 – Titans (2-2) 7

Can the Titans please be consistent? This is getting exhausting.

This week, it was back to the top of the roller coaster as the defense completely decimated a lifeless Bengals team while Derrick Henry made minced meat of a stout Cincy defense to the tune of a completely dominant victory. It was essentially the exact opposite of Tennessee’s last game.

It’s so hard to get a read on this team at this point. Are they the anemic, boring team we saw in Weeks 1 and 3 or the inspired bunch we saw in Weeks 2 and 4? I have no earthly idea. 

16 – Browns (2-2)

I’m essentially striking this Browns performance from the record. They got one of the absolute worst performances I’ve ever seen out of a backup quarterback in Dorian Thompson-Robinson, who was clearly not ready to play. The moment was simply too big for him. Yes, the defense struggled as well, but there was only so much they could do when the offense was as bad as it was. Cleveland gets a very big pass this week. 

17 – Commanders (2-2)

I’m tired. I’m really, really tired. Exhausted, if you will. There’s so many things I want to say about Sunday’s loss in Philadelphia, but I’m still just too emotionally and mentally drained to do it. So I’ll try to keep this brief.

For starters, I was thoroughly impressed with Sam Howell from start to finish. For him to bounce back from his awful performance against Buffalo with probably his best game as a pro, including an insanely clutch drive to tie the game at the buzzer in regulation, tells me all I need to know about him. The kid is simply a gamer. He has more heart than any Washington quarterback since Kirk Cousins combined. And I know he has the skills to do great things if we just stay patient. Him and Terry McLaurin were truly robbed in overtime, but that’s neither here nor there. I’m not going to sit here and complain about refereeing. I’m above that.

We beat ourselves on Sunday. We’re the ones who didn’t get key third down stops. We’re the ones who didn’t make any adjustments on A.J. Brown as he was torching Emmanuel Forbes Jr. all game long. We’re the ones who picked a great time to stop being able to defend the run. We’re the ones who gave up 30 points for the third game in a row. It wasn’t a missed false start or a bad call on a catch being out of bounds. It was us. It’s always us.  

18 – Texans (2-2) 8

C.J. Stroud is him. Need I say more?

The rookie quarterback has absolutely electrified this franchise, along with the rest of the NFL, continuing to set records while lighting up the scoreboard with his dominant, efficient, and clean play. Over 1200 yards with six touchdowns and no interceptions in four games is remarkable. He continues to throw the ball with pinpoint accuracy and anticipation beyond his years. There are a lot of people involved with this rebuild in Houston, but Stroud is single-handedly reviving this franchise.

But I thought they couldn’t develop quarterbacks at Ohio State?

19 – Falcons (2-2) 7

It’s good to know that I have been completely vindicated on my take that Desmond Ridder is the worst starting quarterback in the NFL. At this point, it might not be particularly close. Zach Wilson and Daniel Jones give him a run for his money, but at least those two have flashed in 2023. Ridder has shown nothing of remote value, and the sooner Atlanta moves on from him, the sooner they can get back to winning football games.

I understand that they’re essentially stuck for the year, so it might be time to shift the focus to next year. Because that nice start to the season means nothing when that pumpkin is back there “throwing” the ball and spoon-feeding turnovers to the opposing defense. 

20 – Steelers (2-2) 5

Like the Dolphins, I predicted the Steelers to lose on Sunday, but I never could have seen it being as embarrassing as it was. That’s probably the only comparison I’ll ever make between Miami and Pittsburgh this season.

The Steelers are simply going nowhere, and it’s for the exact same reasons that I have been saying all season long. The offense is horrible and inexcusably elementary thanks to the ineptitude of Matt Canada, whose job security is mind-numbingly still not in question. The secondary is comprised of a bunch of guys who have no idea what they’re doing. Kenny Pickett is straight up not good, even with the scheme weighing him down, and now he has to deal with a knee problem for the foreseeable future. Even if he doesn’t miss any playing time, the injury is still going to affect him, making this atrocious offense somehow even worse.

Buckle up, Steelers fans. If you thought Sunday was bad, it’s about to get a lot worse. 

21 – Saints (2-2) 2

I can’t fathom for the life of me why Derek Carr decided to rush back from an apparently serious shoulder injury to sabotage his own team and lead them right into the dirt with their worst offensive performance of the year to lose a key divisional home game. It makes no damn sense, and it honestly makes me more angry than anything else.

I just hate this idea that quarterbacks should tough it out and play through clearly serious injuries that obviously limit them and make them largely ineffective, and we’re seeing exactly how stupid it is with performances like this one from Carr and the last four from Joe Burrow. It’s just dumb. 

22 – Bengals (1-3) 11

The Bengals are quite easily this week’s Team of Shame, and they might be the saddest one yet. The season is absolutely cooked in Cincinnati, and they have no one to blame for themselves. They have completely mishandled Joe Burrow’s injury (shocking, I know) and now the entire team is unraveling. It’s such a shame for a team that had real championship aspirations and chances just a month ago. 

23 – Vikings (1-3)

In the most Vikings and least convincing way possible, Minnesota is finally off the schneid in 2023.

Other than finally having a 1 in the win column, there’s not much to feel great about here, especially considering the offense had its worst performance of the year by a huge margin. The defense had a nice outing, but it was against what might just be the NFL’s worst offense, so we should take it with a very big grain of salt. I just don’t think this is a very good team.

There’s a lot to like offensively, but that’s it. And if they put together more offensive performances like that, then there will be nothing positive at all in Minnesota. 

24 – Cardinals (1-3)

There’s not much I can say about the Cardinals this week. They held their own against the best team in football and were just as competitive as I expected them to be. They continue to be a very stingy group, and I continue to like what I see out of them.

More than anything, Josh Dobbs keeps on looking great. Against all odds, he has the 10th best passer rating in football. That’s awesome to see.

25 – Colts (2-2)

I’ve said all season long that the main goal for the Colts this season should be developing Anthony Richardson and seeing what he’s made of. Through essentially two games, I can say that Richardson is the real deal, and if he can continue to hone his skills, he can be one of the best quarterbacks in this league. His talent jumps off the screen, and his leadership abilities clearly have a massive impact on this team, as Indy nearly pulled off an all-time comeback on Sunday against the Rams before falling short in overtime.

But I don’t really care about wins and losses for this team. In fact, losses feel like wins. All that matters is that AR15 is looking like a franchise guy, already proving me very, very wrong. 

26 – Patriots (1-3) 6

I wanted to make the Patriots this week’s Team of Shame, but the more I thought about it, the more it didn’t make sense to me. Because I already knew that this team was absolutely dreadful.

Sunday’s embarrassment against the Cowboys was just further proof of everything I already knew. New England is an abhorrent football team with a starting quarterback that doesn’t belong in the NFL and an offense with no playmakers whatsoever. The only good thing about this team was its defense, which just lost its best player by far in Matthew Judon and its rising star in rookie corner Christian Gonzalez.

It’s just all falling apart for Bill Belichick and company. This feels like the right time to stick a fork in them. 

27 – Jets (1-3) 3

There are no moral victories. But everyone felt good about what they saw out of Zach Wilson on Sunday night. He chose a hell of a time to play the best game of his career, and it was nice to see both his team and everyone else rally around him. Maybe, just maybe, he can figure this out. I severely doubt it, but it would be nice to see.

Oh, and stop complaining about the refs. It makes you look foolish. 

28 – Raiders (1-3) 1

I don’t want to be too rude to the Raiders considering they nearly fell ass backwards into a road win against a divisional opponent despite starting a quarterback who looked like he didn’t belong on an NFL field.

At the same time, there’s not much I can say about them this week for that very reason. It’s difficult to assess them after such a nothing performance. It just confirmed much of what we already knew about this team: the offensive line is atrocious, the running game is nonexistent, and the defense is pretty bad too. But at least Davante Adams is here… for now.

29 – Broncos (1-3) 2

They finally did it. The Sean Payton-Russell Wilson Broncos won a football game. It took a 21-point second half comeback against the worst team in football, but it happened. And it was honestly a pretty impressive comeback.

Enjoy it, Denver. That’s probably going to be the peak of your season. 

30 – Panthers (0-4) 1

I don’t think we’re paying enough attention to how disastrous the Panthers have been to start the season.

Frank Reich’s offense has been miserable and Bryce Young has been terrible — although any rookie quarterback behind that bad of an offensive line in a unit completely devoid of playmakers is going to look that bad. Yes, the defense is solid, and they made huge plays on Sunday. But it doesn’t matter when the offense is that dreadful.

This is a team that is squarely in the race for the No. 1 pick in the draft, but it doesn’t matter because they gave away their pick for a quarterback who looks awful right now. Bryce will be fine, but you just get the feeling that Carolina is going to be in the dumps for a while. 

31 – Giants (1-3) 3

It’s embarrassing. It’s shameful. And it’s hilarious.

I can’t get enough of how absolutely dreadful the Giants are. For them and their fans to have victory lapped after an overachieving season and an inexplicable $160 million extension for Daniel Jones just for the season to crash and burn with three primetime embarrassments is just too funny.

I’m going to continue to cherish these moments for as long as I can. 

32 – Bears (0-4)

Making the Bears the Team of Shame every week would just be too easy. It’s low-hanging fruit. And they certainly deserved it this week. But again, I won’t do it.

I’ll just say that this is getting really sad on all fronts. Matt Eberflus needs to be fired yesterday, and this trainwreck of a team needs to start the hell over.


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 3 Power Rankings

A historic weekend of football has brought plenty of shuffling to the Power Rankings, including the first change at the top of the season.

Cover photo taken from Sports Illustrated.

1 – Dolphins (3-0) 4

70 points in an NFL game. That’s all that needs to be said.

Miami already boasted the NFL’s best offense, but Sunday’s historic performance catapults them to the top of this week’s list sheerly out of respect. I still like San Francisco more from top to bottom, but it felt wrong not putting the Dolphins at #1. What they’ve been able to do through three games is astounding. They lead the NFL in total yards, passing yards, rushing yards, and scoring. Even though we’re still in September, that’s virtually unheard of. It’s obviously not sustainable over 17 games, and we’ll see how long they can keep this up. But I feel very, very good about the Phins moving forward. 

2 – 49ers (3-0) 1

Like I said above, I still think the 49ers are the NFL’s best team across the board. Another team just happened to score 70 points this week.

But I love absolutely everything San Francisco is doing right now. The offense is moving the ball at will and seamlessly putting up 30 points per game. Brock Purdy still doesn’t look amazing, but he’s doing everything he needs to do to lead his team to victory, especially protecting the ball. Christian McCaffrey and Deebo Samuel are unstoppable. And the defense continues to do its thing. It’s a formula that the Niners should be able to ride all year long. Until someone proves that they can stop it, they’ll be up here indefinitely. 

3 – Chiefs (2-1)

Once again, the Chiefs looked like the team we always expect them to look like on Sunday. It helped that they were playing the worst team in the NFL. 

It was good to see them score more than 22 points for the first time this season. I’m interested to see how things play out for them this week as they’re Welcomed to New York by a very stout Jets defense. We’ll see how Delicate they handle Patrick Mahomes’ ankle after he was rolled up on late in the first half against Chicago. Between that play and a ton of pre-snap penalties, you just have to hope there’s no Bad Blood between him and Jawaan Taylor. Regardless, we can always count on the Love Story of Mahomes and Travis Kelce to find Blank Spaces in opposing defenses and allow the KC offense to make Sparks Fly.

Don’t Blame Me for all these puns. I’m neither sorry nor will I apologize. 

4 – Eagles (3-0)

The Eagles continue to confuse me. They’re 3-0 with three solid wins, but they’re still yet to put their best football on the field.

However, I think Monday night’s win was by far their best performance yet, especially defensively. They forced timely turnovers, notched a safety, and the secondary barely let anything get past them. The offense didn’t have the best game in the world as Jalen Hurts wound up throwing two interceptions, but the running game dominated once again, which is all this team really needs to succeed.

They feel bound to put it all together and play their most complete game of the year on Sunday against Washington, because I know how these things always play out. It makes too much sense. 

5 – Cowboys (2-1) 3

Dallas was bound to be brought back to earth at some point. I just didn’t expect it to look like that.

The loss of Trevon Diggs is clearly taking its toll on this defense. The question is whether or not that will be a short-term thing or a long-term one. Because if this defense — which was off to a historically great start in 2023 — plays like this as the season continues, they’re in trouble. You don’t just give up 222 yards on the ground in this league. It certainly doesn’t help when Dak Prescott turns back into a pumpkin who throws interceptions into triple coverage in the endzone while the offense stumbles in the redzone time and time again. 

Maybe the Cowboys were drinking too much of their own Kool-Aid, and maybe they needed a game like this to snap back to reality. But it’s safe to say that — for now — I’m a bit concerned. 

6 – Bills (2-1) 1

While Buffalo hasn’t exactly played the highest level of competition over the last two weeks, it’s safe to say that Josh Allen and company are having the type of start to the season that we’ve all come to expect out of them. The QB lights up the box score while making flashy play after flashy play and the defense completely shuts down its opposition by wreaking havoc and racking up sacks and turnovers.

This is how each of the last four Septembers have gone for the Bills. So I won’t overreact to anything just yet. This week’s matchup with the Dolphins will be a much better indicator of where they’re at.

7 – Seahawks (2-1) 1

After a weird opener, the Seahawks have put together consecutive performances that are much more reminiscent of what we’ve come to expect out of them last year and this year. They’re running the ball well, imposing their will physically, and allowing Geno Smith to make plays with his arm to put the offense in a position to score.

Still, Seattle feels a bit underwhelming. I don’t think we’ve seen them put together a game that’s even close to their best yet. Sunday’s win over Carolina felt like the best one yet, but there was still plenty to be desired as the defense could have played better and Geno didn’t have his finest showing.

But I still feel far better about this team than most others in this proverbial tier of the Power Rankings.

8 – Lions (2-1) 4

In a week filled with impressive performances, the Lions stood out to me as one of the best teams of the week. I predicted them to lose, and all they did was thoroughly dominate a Falcons team that had been one of the most solid in the league through the first two weeks.

What I was by far most impressed with was Detroit’s defensive effort, giving up just 183 yards and not allowing a touchdown. That’s a massive improvement, albeit against the worst offense they’ve played this year. If that side of the ball continues to play at that level, the Lions could absolutely soar. 

9 – Ravens (2-1) 3

Everyone is allowed a weird, borderline inexplicable loss to a bad team, especially early in the season. But I still have some concerns with this Ravens team.

I understand that injuries are out of their control, but their supposedly elite defense was absolutely carved up by Gardner Minshew and Zack Moss. That’s not great. And I understand that weather was a factor and they probably should have won in overtime if they rightfully got a DPI call in their favor, but again, these things are out of their control. Maybe they should have been more focused on trying to stop an offense full of backups.

10 – Packers (2-1) 1

The last two weeks haven’t been the prettiest for the Packers, but it’s hard not to like what you see, especially with Jordan Love. At the very least, the young QB is an absolute gamer, and Green Bay is going to be in plenty of games with him being as tough and clutch as he has been. For them to come back from 17 down in the fourth quarter after showing absolutely no signs of life on offense really says something.

I understand that they were playing a Saints team that turned anemic once Derek Carr went down, but it’s not like that caused New Orleans’ defense to lay down and die. Love still had to rally the troops and bring the Packers all the way back, and the way they did so was inspiring.

I still feel plenty good about this team moving forward, and I’m very interested to see how they look on Thursday night against Detroit. 

11 – Bengals (1-2) 6

The Bengals are finally off the scheid in 2023, which is almost entirely thanks to their defensive effort and that of Ja’Marr Chase, who put the offense on his back on Monday night.

Joe Burrow still doesn’t look like himself, which continues to be a major concern, but he did what he had to do. I’m not sure why the Bengals made him drop back 53 times on a bad calf, but that’s neither here nor there. His quick passes and the playmaking ability of Chase put the team in enough positions to kick enough field goals to win. Is that a sustainable winning formula? Absolutely not. But it’s working… for now.

I was far more impressed with Cincy’s defense, especially up front as they racked up six sacks and forced two turnovers. That side of the ball will need to do the heavy lifting while Burrow continues to recover from a calf issue, and although they put together that performance against a horrible Rams offensive line, it’s hard not to like what I’ve seen. Hopefully for their sake, they can channel this into some better performances than they had in their first two games. 

12 – Falcons (2-1) 2

No single team disappointed me as much last week as the Falcons. For me to pick them to win only for them to not even amass 200 total yards while refusing to score a touchdown is a bad look. It was the type of poor offensive performance that I’m always weary of with Atlanta.

It’s certainly a problem, but I feel good about their ability to bounce back given what they’ve showed in their first two games. I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt for now. They’ll need to reconvince me this week in London. 

13 – Jaguars (1-2) 5

It certainly appears that the Jaguars were drinking too much of their own Kool-Aid, perhaps so much so that they’ve completely drowned in it. They’ve yet to put together a remotely solid performance this season, and there are concerns aplenty with this team that was supposed to be one of the best in football.

The offense is a total mess with drops galore, the secondary is one of the worst in football, and Trevor Lawrence doesn’t look like the quarterback we saw late last year. I feel good about their ability to turn this thing around, but they need to prove themselves as soon as possible. The good news is that the schedule is pretty easy, but the Jags haven’t made anything look easy so far in 2023.  

14 – Chargers (1-2) 2

I could write a book about the Chargers at this point, but I’ll try and keep this brief for both of our sakes.

Sunday’s win was the absolute epitome of what this team is — a stellar offense led by one of the best quarterbacks in football with a dreadful defense that gets gashed all game long but is capable of making enough timely turnovers to win some games. That does not feel like a long-term winning formula.

There’s only so much Justin Herbert can do, and his job just got much harder with Mike Williams suffering a season-ending ACL injury. I don’t think Keenan Allen can put together 15-catch, 200-yard performances every week. The good news is that Austin Ekeler should be returning soon. But unless this defense shores up, it’s hard to feel good about LA’s chances in any game against an offense with a pulse. 

15 – Steelers (2-1) 5

Despite a solid showing on Sunday night, I still have plenty of reservations about Pittsburgh’s offense. I’m not going to be convinced by a good performance against a Raiders defense that can’t stop a nosebleed.

My bigger takeaway from the win in Vegas was how poor the secondary looked. That’s becoming a concerning trend. Against teams that aren’t turnover machines like the Browns and Raiders were — like the 49ers in Week 1 — that’s going to lose the Steelers plenty of games. The offense simply isn’t good enough to make up for any and all defensive shortcomings. 

16 – Browns (2-1) 5

I’ve seen a lot of lists with the Browns in or just outside of the top 10, which is a sentiment I can understand. But I just don’t know what to make of this team at this point. Their inconsistency perplexes me, and until I see some more steady play over the course of several games, I think they’re just going to be a middle of the pack team.

Still, there’s plenty to like with Cleveland. The defense has been nothing short of elite as they rank first in total yards, passing yards, and scoring while ranking second in rushing yards. It’s easy to win games with a unit as dominant as this one. It also helps that Deshaun Watson played perhaps his best game as a Brown on Sunday against the Titans. But again, I’m going to need to see that more consistently to bump this team up higher. 

17 – Commanders (2-1) 4

I don’t wanna talk about it. All I can say is I told you so. I told you not to get your hopes up with this young, raw quarterback and this horrendous offensive line.

The fanbase desperately needed this reality check. Maybe I did too. 

18 – Rams (1-2)

The Rams really confuse me. The only thing I know for certain with them is that their offensive line is terrible and their defense is pretty solid. Other than that, everything else they do is completely up to chance.

We saw how anemic their offense looked when Kyren Williams and Puka Nacua were neutralized — which is something that will probably change once Cooper Kupp re-enters the picture. But ever since their opening win, LA hasn’t shown us much to like. We’ll see how that changes over the next few weeks against some stingy opposition. 

19 – Saints (2-1)

I’m giving the Saints a rare pass for blowing a 17-point fourth quarter lead due to the unfortunate shoulder injury suffered by Derek Carr that’s going to keep him out for a while. Up to that point, this team looked very convincing, and I was ready to give them a massive apology. But they completely collapsed down the stretch, and Jameis Winston didn’t exactly have the best relief appearance.

Still, I feel good about Jameis’ ability to lead this team in Carr’s absence. That just happened to be a tough circumstance to be thrown into. This defense is still elite, and Alvin Kamara is finally back to give the skill position group — which has been shockingly good — a huge boost. I get the feeling the Saints are going to be just fine.  

20 – Patriots (1-2) 3

There’s really not much I can say about the Patriots this week. That was simply the typical post-Brady win over the Jets — terrible offense in terrible conditions with a late defensive or special teams play to secure the win. It’s becoming too predictable at this point, honestly.

Despite this being their only win, it was by far the least convincing performance New England has put together so far this year. But like I said, that’s how their games against the Jets go these days. This weekend’s matchup with Dallas will be a much better benchmark for them.

21 – Buccaneers (2-1) 7

Monday night’s performance was everything that I feared the Buccaneers were capable of thanks to their subpar quarterback play.

Yes, Baker Mayfield had a great opening two games, but they were against two bottom 10 passing defenses. The concerning part of that statistic is that the Eagles have a worse secondary than the Vikings do, statistically. The difference is that, between a nonexistent run game and a defensive disasterclass, the entire game fell on the shoulders of Baker, who is simply not capable of leading a team to victory on his own.

I don’t think many Bucs games will look like Monday night’s, but we should definitely be wary of such a performance moving forward. 

22 – Titans (1-2) 7

I seriously considered making the Titans this week’s Team of Shame, but they get a bit of a pass thanks to going against one of the NFL’s best defenses. Still, that was terrible. They had 94 total yards of offense — ninety four! They couldn’t even get to triple digits! And they didn’t even turn the ball over in the process!

Tennessee just got completely outclassed on both sides of the ball. That’s an early contender for worst performance of the year, but it’s being overshadowed by a horrible game from a certain orange-wearing team this week. Regardless, the Titans are being decked big time, and it’s going to take a lot of convincing for me to bring them back up. 

23 – Vikings (0-3) 1

Regression to the mean. 11-0 in one-score games in 2022. 0-3 in such games in 2023. Starting to sound like a broken record.

You can make the argument that the Vikings deserved to win this game, but I would not listen to such an argument. They lost in the exact same way that has plagued both of their other losses this year: the defense gets torn apart while redzone turnovers ruin prime scoring opportunities that would have won the game. It’s like every Minnesota game this year has been a copy-and-pasted version of the others with a few tweaks here and there. It’s actually stupefying.

Taking all of this into account,, it’s safe to say that we can stick a fork in the 2023 Vikings. Making the playoffs after starting 0-3 is virtually impossible. At this point, they should shift their sights to April’s draft.  

24 – Cardinals (1-2) 6

The Cardinals have been frisky all year long, and it finally paid off in their first win of the season in a massive upset over the Cowboys. Good for them. It was awesome to see their offense ball out, especially against arguably the best defense in the NFL, while their own defense put together a phenomenal performance.

It’s just as I said before the season began: this is a team in a new era that is going to be fighting week in and week out. With a roster that’s way more talented than we thought featuring a defense with a ton of young playmakers, that’s going to translate to a good amount of wins. 

25 – Colts (2-1) 3

For the second consecutive year, the Colts have won a Week 3 game against an elite AFC team that they had absolutely business beating. This one is different from last year’s win over Kansas City, though, as Indy was on the road in Baltimore and came all the way back to win in overtime with a backup QB after he nearly single-handedly lost the game by Orlovsky-ing out of the endzone late in the fourth quarter.

The Colts are like the Cardinals in the sense that they’re now coached by a former Eagles coordinator who is clearly doing a great job of implementing a new culture. This team wants to win, and even without their star young quarterback and running back, that has been apparent in the last couple of weeks. And like the Cardinals, you have to imagine that’ll translate to wins. 

26 – Texans (1-2) 5

In a stunning turn of events, C.J. Stroud is pretty amazing at football. Who could have seen that coming?

The stud rookie quarterback has set the record for most passing yards without an interception through his first three games, and he has done so by utilizing his young weapons like Tank Dell and Nico Collins — throwing the ball with tremendous accuracy and anticipation. Some of the stuff that C.J. is doing is well beyond his years, and reminds me of the flashes that Justin Herbert showed in his 2020 rookie campaign.

With a defense that’s also suddenly playing above expectation levels, I think Houston is going to be in great shape, especially in the long-term. 

27 – Raiders (1-2) 1

Sunday night was the ultimate Jimmy Garoppolo game. He’ll make some nice passes and distribute the ball effectively, but when the going gets tough, he turns into a pumpkin. It obviously doesn’t help when your offensive line might as well not suit up and your running game doesn’t exist.

But that’s obviously not the biggest takeaway from the loss. That would be Josh McDaniels’ incompetence, which is something that I’ve been preaching ever since I developed the ability to speak. He is simply an inept, incapable head coach that will lose you more games than he wins you. That’s really all there is to it. 

28 – Giants (1-2) 3

What can I even say about the Giants at this point? They’re impossible to watch and one of the NFL’s biggest disappointments. I don’t even feel like thinking about them, let alone talk about them. But I do relish in them being terrible. 

29 – Panthers (0-3)

Is there a team more boring than the Panthers right now? They have one of the worst skill position groups in the league, and even when Bryce Young plays, there’s no point in watching. There’s nothing he can do behind that horrendous offensive line. The defense is supposed to be great, but injuries have completely derailed them, and now they’re giving up points in bunches.

You’d think there’s nowhere to go but up from here, but I think it’s actually going to get worse before it gets better. It’s okay Carolina, at least you guys have your first round pick this year… oh wait. 

30 – Jets (1-2) 6

I really don’t feel like talking about the Jets while Zach Wilson continues to start for them. Can we please just move on? For all of our sakes?

31 – Broncos (0-3) 4

In a week littered with potential candidates for the Team of Shame, the Broncos stand out above the rest.

After Sean Payton — who the team traded a first round pick for — went out and said this team had the worst head coaching stint in NFL history, all he has done is run Denver into the dirt with a historically bad 0-3 start that includes Sunday’s 50-point thrashing where they gave up the most points the NFL has seen since the Nixon administration.

At this point, you just wonder how much longer the franchise sticks with him and Russ. They certainly feel stuck in quicksand. And I have no sympathy for them. 

32 – Bears (0-3)

It has never been more over.


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 2 Power Rankings

Through two scintillating weeks of play, we’re starting to get a better idea of where every team in the NFL stands — the good, the bad, the ugly, and the very ugly.

Cover photo taken from San Diego Union-Tribune.

1 – 49ers (2-0)

I don’t know how you’re supposed to stop this team. The Rams put together a masterful offensive gameplan and still essentially lost by multiple scores. Even with a lackluster Brock Purdy performance, the offense continues to hum their way to 30-point outings. Christian McCaffrey has scored in 11 straight games. Deebo Samuel is getting back involved in the run game.

Until I see them even remotely slow down, the 49ers are going to live in this #1 spot. Considering their upcoming schedule, they should get nice and cozy.

2 – Cowboys (2-0)

Once again, I seriously considered putting the Cowboys at the top of this list. Their defense is just so incredible, and Micah Parsons is on an unstoppable tear. The offense is thriving in every facet, which is something I wasn’t expecting against the caliber of defenses they’ve played. The Giants aren’t great, but to cut up the Jets the way they did was eye-opening.

History leads me to believe that the wheels are bound to come off, but this might just be the Cowboys. team to flip the script.

3 – Chiefs (1-1)

In the least shocking development ever, the Chiefs are totally fine! That tends to happen when you get Travis Kelce and Chris Jones back. They both made their usual impacts in their season debuts, just as I predicted.

Oh, and Kansas City’s next six games are against teams with a combined 1-11 record. Hope you didn’t make the mistake of writing these guys off.

4 – Eagles (2-0)

While Philly continues to dazzle offensively — despite some strange playcalling — and dominate up front, their secondary is a real concern. If it wasn’t for a flurry of turnovers — including some lucky ones — there’s a real chance that they could have lost to the Vikings on Thursday. I suppose you could make the argument that they’ve given up a ton of garbage time yards in the last two games, which is fair.

We’ll see how the pass defense looks when the going gets tough.

5 – Dolphins (2-0)

At this point, 5 feels too low for the Dolphins. They have arguably been the most impressive team in the league through two games.

Their defense still concerns me a bit, but they played much better than I expected them to on Sunday night. Again, it might not even matter when their offense is as insane as it is. Mike McDaniel’s schemes combined with the execution of Tua Tagovailoa has this offense looking like the single best in the league, and I don’t know how anyone is supposed to stop them. I thought the Patriots had a shot, but they weren’t even close. While there are some tough defenses ahead on paper, I’ve seen nothing to make me believe that this offense won’t stop decimating opponents while the team keeps racking up wins.

By all accounts, the AFC East — and maybe even the 1 seed — is theirs to lose. 

6 – Ravens (2-0) 4

I’ll never know how they do it. Year in, year out, the Ravens rack up injuries like no other team and still find ways to win.

I have to give a ton of props to Lamar Jackson, who was infinitely better against the Bengals than he was against the Texans. He looked like his usual self, which involved some incredible throws. Zay Flowers is already proving himself as the WR1 in that offense, and the running game didn’t fall off at all despite the absence of J.K. Dobbins. The defense also continues to look like one of the scariest in the NFL, and although I recognize that they’ve played Houston and a Cincinnati offense with Joe Burrow on one leg, I have no doubts that they’ll continue to play at an elite level.

As the only 2-0 team in a division with three other teams with plenty of questions to answer, Baltimore figures to get out ahead of the pack in the coming weeks. 

7 – Bills (1-1) 6

The Bills are the beneficiary of a lot of teams that were above them last week turning into pumpkins this week. They completely met my expectations as they predictably tore apart a Raiders team that somehow looks worse than I anticipated. But I’ll give credit where credit is due — Josh Allen had one of his patented elite September performances, and the defense looked amazing.

Still, I will always proceed with caution with this team. I’m going to have to actually see it against real teams to believe it. 

8 – Jaguars (1-1) 2

I didn’t want to give the Jaguars the benefit of the doubt, but I’m going to… for now.

They looked absolutely lost on offense, but they were also playing an elite defense that just got its best player back. The defense gave up a ton of yards, but they did force timely turnovers to keep them in the game. There’s just nothing you can do when your star quarterback goes 0-for-7 in the redzone and your offense doesn’t get in the endzone. Week 1 was an indicator of what this offense can be at its peak, Week 2 was proof that maybe they’re not ready for primetime yet.

But they have plenty of time to prove me wrong. 

9 – Seahawks (1-1) 6

The Seahawks seemed to return to form in a wild way on Sunday, excelling offensively and making the necessary defensive plays to come away with a win. It was very reminiscent of what we saw for so much of last season. And when they play like that, they will be very difficult to beat. That combined with the apparent fact that their Week 1 loss doesn’t look as bad as it did in the moment makes me feel comfortable inserting them into the top 10.

As long as they stay healthy, they will continue to rack up wins against a pretty soft upcoming schedule. 

10 – Falcons (2-0) 7

The Falcons in the top 10. Something I never thought I’d do. But they have earned it, and they have really, really impressed me.

Sunday’s comeback win was a truly inspiring one as the defense played incredibly down the stretch and the offense found ways to win. Bijan Robinson is already one of the best running backs in football, and Drake London is really starting to emerge as a true WR1. I still have my reservations about Desmond Ridder, and I have no idea what this team is doing with Kyle Pitts, who has eight targets in two games. But I love Robinson and London, I love their defense, I love their culture, and I think they are getting ready to make some real noise. 

11 – Packers (1-1) 4

The Packers played a very strange game on Sunday. For three quarters, they were absolutely lights out. Jordan Love was tearing it up once again and the offense was churning out yards and points despite not having Aaron Jones or Christian Watson.

Then, all of a sudden, they just stopped. They straight up stopped playing offense. Up 11 in the fourth quarter, they refused to move the chains, and the wheels eventually fell off the defense, which makes sense considering they kept on being put back on the field.

I think it was a strange ending to an otherwise impressive performance, and one that shouldn’t repeat itself any time soon, especially with the two key offensive pieces returning. But it was definitely concerning. 

12 – Lions (1-1) 4

I don’t want to say the Lions got too ahead of themselves, but it appears that might’ve been the case considering how they played on Sunday.

It wasn’t a bad performance by any means, but it was definitely a lackluster considering how they looked in Week 1 and all of last season at home. Jared Goff finally ended his crystal clean play with a backbreaking pick six, Jahmyr Gibbs couldn’t quite get going, and David Montgomery got injured. The defense seemed to return to 2022 form as well as they got carved up by the same team that dropped 48 on them last season.

These are the reasons I told you all to err on the side of caution with the Lions. I need to see them churn out great performances more consistently. So far in 2023, I’m not seeing much of that. 

13 – Commanders (2-0) 7

I don’t even know where to begin.

2-0 for the first time since I was 10 years old. Sam Howell is 3-0 as a starter and just played a game I never thought I’d see out of him. Terry McLaurin is top 10. Both Brian Robinson and Antonio Gibson looked amazing. Eric Bieniemy might just be a godsend. Chase Young is back. The defense — which leads the league in sacks and pressures — was absolutely incredible (other than an abysmal start and a wonky ending, of course).

This team has never given me so much of a reason to be excited. Not for several years, at least. I’m still not going to get my hopes up for the sake of my own sanity and emotional well-being, but I’ll be damned. I’m this close to doing it. 

14 – Buccaneers (2-0) 7

It may have been against two 0-2 teams, but Baker Mayfield and this Bucs offense are cooking. I see a regression in their future, but for now, I’m going to give them props.

Baker has looked excellent through two games, which makes it hard to believe the offseason quarterback “competition” was remotely close. Him and Mike Evans already have an incredible rapport. The offensive line is looking better, and Rachaad White actually had a nice outing.

But again, the defense continues to stand out to me. While the Bears are pretty abysmal, the Vikings are clearly no pushover on offense, which makes that performance even more impressive.

Again, I don’t know how long Tampa can keep this up, and this division might be better than we gave them credit for. But I really like what they have going on right now. 

15 – Titans (1-1) 10

This is a huge jump, but more than anything, it’s an apology. I was far too harsh to this team last week for no reason. This is me making amends.

Their wild comeback to beat the Chargers was a classic Titans win. It wasn’t pretty by any means, but they just found a way to win. I understand things might have gone differently if Austin Ekeler had played for LA, but I’m not going to knock Tennessee because of that. I was impressed with what they did on Sunday, and while I still don’t really believe on them, it’s a good sign that they’re still going to fight tooth and nail week in and week out. That will translate to plenty of wins. 

16 – Chargers (0-2) 7

It’s only Week 3, and the Chargers’ season is already on the line. Thanks to two brutal fourth quarters, this team is 0-2, and now every single game is a must-win for them. It’s a bit hard to put any faith in this team in a must-win scenario. But they could easily be 2-0. With Austin Ekeler back in the lineup, you’d have to think they find a way to win a game.

But that’s not what this franchise does. They find ways to lose games instead. And one more essentially ends their year. 

17 – Bengals (0-2) 6

Speaking of teams who are one loss away from their season being cooked, the Bengals are staring down a very long, treacherous barrel right now. And realistically, they have no one to blame but themselves.

I don’t necessarily think Joe Burrow was rushed back from his calf strain, but he definitely returned a bit too soon, as he has been completely ineffective through two games and is now looking at missing time after re-aggravating it on Sunday. Cincinnati doesn’t exactly have many breaks in their schedule that allows that to be easy. It certainly doesn’t help that the defense isn’t playing nearly as well as expected.

This team is just so disappointing and lackluster on both sides of the ball right now. In the last four seasons, they’re the only team to make the postseason after starting 0-2, which they did last year. With Burrow either active and a shell of himself or not active at all, the Bengals are going to have another steep uphill climb to the playoffs.

18 – Rams (1-1) 4

I still think I’m being pretty mean to the Rams. They’ve surprised me more than any other team through two games.

They’ve been very good offensively thanks to the incredible emergence of Puka Nacua and Kyren Williams, and Matt Stafford continues to make me look foolish. Perhaps the most shocking thing about this team is that their defense is actually solid as well. I think the Rams have what it takes to be a very good, competitive team. I’m not going to rush to call them a top 10 squad like some people in the media are, but they certainly don’t appear to be nearly as bad as I anticipated. Their two performances so far this season give me reason to believe they can float around .500. 

19 – Saints (2-0) 4

I’m being cautiously optimistic with the Saints, but I must say that I like what I’ve seen through two games. They haven’t been the prettiest wins, but they’ve been solid ones.

I still think Derek Carr is simply not a good player, but he doesn’t have to be for this offense to succeed. They just need to go on a few scoring drives here and there while their defense does the rest. That side of the ball has been fantastic so far this year thanks to their ageless wonders up front and their continued elite secondary play led by Marshon Lattimore.

The Saints clearly have their winning formula. It’s just a matter of sticking to it. 

20 – Steelers (1-1) 1

Pittsburgh’s defense, which won them the game on Monday night, needs no introduction. I could talk about T.J. Watt and Alex Highsmith all day, but that’s not how I want to spend this time.

I instead want to continue to implore the Steelers to fire Matt Canada and figure out what the hell they’re doing on offense. Because I don’t know if I can stomach any more of the nonsense they are putting on the field. Not only is it impossible to watch, but it’s honestly embarrassing. And I’m a lifelong Steelers hater. I can’t imagine what it’s like being a fan of a team with this offense. George Pickens and Jaylen Warren are great players, but Najee Harris looks worse by the week, and the scheme shows us nothing to like with Kenny Pickett. The pieces are clearly there, but this offense is going nowhere fast as it stands. That means the team is likely going nowhere either.

The Steelers are lucky that their defense is as amazing as it is. Teams don’t put up -7 total yards of offense in a fourth quarter and still pull off a comeback victory very often. 

21 – Browns (1-1) 5

Congratulations, Browns! You are the Week 2 Team of Shame! It was going to be the Cardinals, but you swooped in and stole it at the last moment! Hope you enjoy all these years of paying Deshaun Watson hundreds of millions to look like one of the worst starting quarterbacks in the NFL! 

*note: I want to mention that Nick Chubb’s injury was horrible and I feel absolutely terrible for him and the Browns fanbase. Nobody deserves that, least of all a guy as elite and likable as Chubb. I don’t know what a recovery timetable looks like for him, but I’m praying for him and always rooting for him.

22 – Vikings (0-2)

For as long as it continues to apply, I’m going to keep saying it: regression to the mean. 11-0 in one-score games in 2022. 0-2 in such contests in 2023. That’s really all that needs to be said.

The Vikings realistically could have won on Thursday if it wasn’t for a wave of wonky turnovers, but part of that is on them. This is a team that’s going to put up big numbers and feel like they should be far better than they actually are, but that’s not going to translate to a lot of wins. They have to be more focused on not beating themselves than beating the other team. Doesn’t seem like a recipe for success.

One more loss and the season is effectively over in Minnesota. Luckily for them, they have their AFC mirror image coming to town for what should be an absolutely hilarious matchup on Sunday. I can’t wait to see it. 

23 – Patriots (0-2) 5

The Patriots are 2-0 in the moral victories department. Maybe they can replace their dynasty of Super Bowls with one of moral victories.

Maybe if they didn’t get off to such awful starts, they’d be able to rack up some actual wins. But they’ve faced 16 and 14-point deficits to start each game this season. When your offense operates like it does under Mac Jones, you’re not going to win games falling behind like that. I don’t know why it takes this defense so long to adjust, but once they do, they actually play great football. It’s just strange that it takes them so long. It doesn’t help when the offense is as turnover happy as it has been, especially early in games to put themselves in such holes.

These all feel like things that could improve and/or balance themselves out as the season progresses. But as it stands, the Patriots are in trouble. The time to figure this out is running out quickly.

24 – Jets (1-1) 12

The Jets are back to being the Jets. I wasn’t expecting it to happen so early in the year, but here we are.

I’ll keep this brief so I don’t sound like a broken record. Zach Wilson is the worst quarterback in the NFL. Starter, backup, practice squad, it doesn’t matter. He is not an NFL player. I don’t understand this team’s commitment to remaining steadfastly at his side and insisting that he’s “their guy.” He’s no one’s guy. He’s an abhorrent football player. The sooner this team makes a move for a veteran quarterback to right the ship, the better.

But you just get the feeling that’s not going to happen. Who knows, maybe I’ll have to throw the Jets in the Caleb Williams Sweepstakes. Imagine telling that to someone three weeks ago.

25 – Giants (1-1) 4

You are so lucky. So, so lucky.

I was so ready to tear into the Giants this week, but I’ll give credit where credit is due. Pulling off the biggest comeback in franchise history on the road with a nearly flawless half of football is no easy task, even if it was against one of the worst teams in the league. That’s a win that this team needed desperately after starting their season in a 60-0 scoring hole, which grows to 98-7 dating back to last season’s playoffs. Brian Daboll clearly worked some magic at halftime for the Giants to come out firing on all cylinders thanks to Daniel Jones playing the best half of his career.

Still, I don’t remotely buy this team. Saquon Barkley being out for a few weeks with an ankle sprain is going to expose a lot of problems with this offense, even if Jalin Hyatt looked really nice on Sunday. This defense is just terrible, and with San Francisco coming up, it could be another ugly outing on national television for the team that everyone implored me was better than the Commanders. 

26 – Raiders (1-1) 2

The Raiders are who we thought they were. They might actually be worse.

I’m mainly concerned with how unfathomably terrible their run game has been. How do you have the third worst rushing offense in the league with the defending rushing champ in the backfield? It certainly doesn’t help that you have a pumpkin at QB and both of your top two WRs have gotten knocked out of back-to-back games. I wish I could say that I still like this defense, but Sunday was a clear return to form for them.

I think we’re going to see a lot more Raiders performances like that than the one we saw in Denver to open the year. 

27 – Broncos (0-2) 1

The Sean Payton era is off to a rocking start as the Broncos have lost back-to-back games at home with a loss to a bad Raiders team and a blown 18-point lead second-half embarrassment at the hands of the Commanders. Who could have seen this coming?

I guess the sky isn’t completely falling in Denver, considering how well Russell Wilson has been playing, at least on paper. But I can’t make heads or tails of this team. I never can. I mainly can’t wrap my head around this defense, which got absolutely torched on Sunday.

But it doesn’t matter. Like I said last week, these are the same old Broncos. They may be finding new ways to do it, but you can keep on counting on them to lose.

28 – Colts (1-1) 1

The good news is that Anthony Richardson seems to be pretty good at football. The bad news is that Anthony Richardson is hurt.

I hope he doesn’t miss too much time, if any at all, because he has been shockingly fun to watch. The offense didn’t seem to miss a beat in his absence, but they were also playing the Texans, so I’ll take that with a grain of salt.

With or without Richardson, this isn’t a great team, but at the very least, they’re fun. And who doesn’t love a fun bad team?

29 – Panthers (0-2) 1

The Panthers could feasibly be lower on this list. This season is off to the worst possible start for them, and it doesn’t look like it’s getting better any time soon.

The offense is a complete dumpster fire with Bryce Young showing us barely anything to like through two games. The skill position additions are largely nonexistent, either due to a lack of talent or a head-scratching scheme. Yes, the defense offers lots to like, but they have folded at the biggest moments in each game thus far. And they’re not a good enough unit to make up for the offensive shortcomings.

Buckle up, Carolina. It’s going to be a long year. 

30 – Cardinals (0-2)

The Cardinals were going to be this week’s Team of Shame before the Browns stole that mantle at the buzzer. But that doesn’t mean this team is excused from being torn apart.

Blowing a 21-point second half lead is simply inexcusable at any level of football. It’s even worse when you do it to a team as bad as the Giants on your home turf. I was still impressed with their ability to build such a big lead, and I still think this is a competitive team that isn’t as bad as they seem, but it’s losses like that which prove to everyone that you’re not worth taking seriously.

But we all know the truth: Arizona definitely views losses as wins at this point. 

31 – Texans (0-2)

You know, at least C.J. Stroud and Nico Collins lit up the box score. Other than that, I have nothing remotely positive to say about the Texans. They should probably be at the bottom of this list. Regardless, they won’t move from this basement any time soon. 

32 – Bears (0-2)

I’m running out of things to say. I just don’t get it anymore. It truly pains me to say it, but I don’t know how much more of Justin Fields we’re going to see before it becomes apparent that he simply isn’t an NFL QB. That’s truly heartbreaking for me, but it’s just the truth. I can’t even blame this on the team around him. For at least this week, this is on him.

And he needs to turn it around. Fast. 


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 1 Power Rankings

An incredibly fun, upset-littered opening week of the year has made the Power Rankings even harder to construct than they already are to start a season. Here’s my first crack at it in 2023.

Cover photo taken from AS USA.

1 – 49ers (1-0)

San Francisco was probably the best team in the league entering Week 1. Their performance in Pittsburgh validated that sentiment. They went on the road and made a seemingly solid Steelers team look like they didn’t belong on the same field as them. Pittsburgh never gets embarrassed like that, especially at home.

Brock Purdy looked fantastic just six months removed from his UCL surgery, Christian McCaffrey was dominant as always, Brandon Aiyuk looked like a true WR1, and the defense was just mesmerizing. No one in the world is beating the 49ers when they play like they did on Sunday. 

2 – Cowboys (1-0)

Dallas didn’t just have the most dominant performance of Week 1. They had one of the most dominant performances I’ve ever seen. I seriously considered putting them at the top spot this week.

I expected them to go into East Rutherford and look significantly better than the Giants, but I never could have expected the type of game they had, especially defensively. I had very high hopes for that unit, but to pitch a road shutout in a divisional game and dominate a seemingly good offensive line the way they did was stunning. Seven sacks, two interceptions — including a pick six — a blocked field goal for a touchdown, and five forced fumbles is the type of statline you put up when you play your younger sibling in Madden for the first time.

And it wasn’t just the defense — the offense was able to move the ball up and down on a pretty solid Giants defense. Tony Pollard thrived in his first game as the RB1, and it didn’t matter at all that the passing game wasn’t very effective due to the pouring rain. The Cowboys dominated in the trenches on both sides of the ball. I don’t know if it will look like that every week, but I think we can get used to seeing it. 

3 – Chiefs (0-1)

Let’s all pump the brakes. The Chiefs are going to be just fine. God forbid they lose a game by one point without arguably the best tight end of all time and a top three defensive tackle in football!

You know what the funniest part of this whole narrative is? Kansas City would have won if Kadarius Toney made literally any of the catches he dropped. The first one would have prevented a pick six, the second would have set up a score, and the third would have set up the winning field goal. For the Chiefs to be largely in control in that game without Travis Kelce and Chris Jones tells me everything I need to know about them. They’re a very good football team. And once those two get back, it’ll be curtains for the league.

A lot is being made of the lack of WR talent on the team, which is fair. But once Kelce is back, it’ll look a lot like it did last year — defenses will be so consumed with Kelce that everyone else is going to have space to operate.

And I was thoroughly impressed with the Chiefs defense. The young guys like McDuffie, Karlaftis, and Bolton are absolutely hooping. With Jones back, they’ll also be back to being a very, very good unit.

This team is going to be more than fine. Just wait a bit. 

4 – Eagles (1-0)

I’m giving most teams that played in the elements the benefit of the doubt. But I honestly wasn’t very impressed with the Eagles on Sunday.

Their offense only scored one touchdown, and it was after a fumble set them up at the 26-yard line. Their patented run game only generated 97 yards on the ground as they were outgained by 132 yards of total offense by a team that’s significantly worse on that side of the ball. I understand pouring rain doesn’t exactly enhance an offense, but the Eagles looked much better in those conditions last year against Jacksonville than they did on Sunday in Foxboro.

The defense didn’t have the best game on paper, but there was a lot to like with their performance. Darius Slay returned an interception 70 yards for a score, Jalen Carter was impossible to stop in his debut, and Jordan Davis forced a fumble. I don’t know how or why there were so many coverage breakdowns that let Mac Jones cut them up for 316 yards and 3 touchdowns, but I get the impression that these are just some growing pains that come with a new defensive scheme. They’ll probably be just fine.  

5 – Dolphins (1-0)

We all know Tua Tagovailoa is a solid quarterback. We all know that Tyreek Hill is one of the best receivers in football and perhaps the single most dynamic player in the league. But I don’t think any of us could have predicted that.

Tua and Tyreek’s offensive explosion on Sunday in Los Angeles was simply stunning. I was mesmerized from start to finish. Tua played what has to be the best game of his career — including making hands down the best throw of his career, the 4th quarter deep shot on the run to Hill — against a very solid Chargers defense. He was pinpoint with his accuracy, he made good decisions, and he put up one of the best Week 1 performances ever. It helps when you’re throwing the ball to Tyreek Hill, who simply never slows down. He embarrassed LA’s defense all day long with his once-in-a-lifetime blend of speed and ball skills. It might’ve been the most impressive game he has played as well.

Despite the offensive explosion, Miami’s defense left a lot to be desired. They gave up 433 yards of offense including a whopping 234 on the ground, allowing the Chargers to gash them for 5.9 yards per carry. But, when they needed it most, the defense shored up, especially up front. This is a unit that figures to get better with time as the new pieces continue to gel under Vic Fangio. Once that happens, this team is going to be terrifying. 

6 – Jaguars (1-0)

It wasn’t pretty, but how many road divisional games are?

I was very confident in picking the Jaguars last Thursday, but as time went on, I got more and more skeptical. I always thought they’d win, but a struggle seemed likely. It was certainly a struggle, but a very weird one.

The wacky live ball fumble returned for a touchdown and a few other nice plays from the Colts made things difficult, but in the end, the Jags looked great in all of the ways I expected them to. Calvin Ridley burst onto the scene with a fantastic opening game in a Jacksonville uniform, Travis Etienne had a solid outing, and Trevor Lawrence was absolutely pinpoint with the football.

The defense didn’t have the best day in the world, but I certainly liked what I saw from Travon Walker, who could be in for a special sophomore campaign. The Jaguars needed to get this weird one out of the way ahead of their Week 2 matchup with Kansas City. Now that they have, they should be in for a torrid stretch of football.

7 – Packers (1-0)

I know it’s the Bears, but… I told you so?

It has only been one game against the worst team in the league, so I want to proceed with caution. But at this rate, I’ve nailed all of my takes about the Packers thus far. Their defense is still great. Jordan Love is a fantastic talent that will only get better. All of their young receivers are dogs. They are going to continue to run this division.

Sure, it wasn’t a perfect performance by any means. But the way they turned it on in the second half was truly something to behold. This team has the talent and the coaching to have a great regular season, just like I predicted.

8 – Lions (1-0)

Kudos to the Lions for proving me wrong so far. I won’t get into the reasons why the win doesn’t mean as much as most people think it does because I already did that (see: No. 3). I’ll use this space to talk about what I liked with the Lions on Thursday.

I have to start with Jared Goff, who not only looked very comfortable, but very effective. He made some fantastic throws, especially over the middle, and I was very pleasantly surprised with how poised he looked in the pocket. And this was with two of his receivers — Marvin Jones Jr. and Josh Reynolds — being extremely ineffective. Obviously it helps when you’re throwing to Amon-Ra St. Brown, who looked incredible and could be in for his best season yet. He also got some lifts from his new RB duo of David Montgomery and Jahmyr Gibbs — who clearly is the flashier back and should be used more, but might be being saved for later this season, who knows.

Defensively, I thought the newcomers really splashed. Jack Campbell looked effective in both the run and pass defense, C.J. Gardner-Johnson had a few key PBUs, and Brian Branch had the game-changing pick six that essentially won the game for Detroit.

Everything is really coming together for this Lions team right now, and I think they’re only going to continue trending upwards. I’m ready to eat crow.

9 – Chargers (0-1)

New season, same old Chargers.

Offense puts up over 400 yards? Defense is worth over a half billion dollars in contract money and has so-called superstars all over the place and is facing an offensive line without it’s elite starting left tackle? That’s cool, they’re going to give up over 500 yards, including 466 through the air with 211 going to one Tyreek Hill. Run game is absolutely feasting? Doesn’t matter, the passing game can’t follow suit.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like Sunday was a total disaster for LA. The team looked pretty good for the most part against one of the best teams in the league. But that was a performance that they need to put in the rear view mirror, especially defensively.

I think the only thing they should feel good about is the fact that they have Austin Ekeler. In every other aspect, they need to go back to the drawing board. 

10 – Ravens (1-0)

How foolish of us to believe that the injury bug wouldn’t live rent-free in Baltimore this season. Some things never change.

Despite a blowout win on Sunday, the Ravens probably feel worse now than they did at this time last week. J.K. Dobbins suffered his third consecutive season-ending injury with a torn Achilles after being tackled from a weird angle, Marcus Williams could miss extended time with a torn pec, and both Ronnie Stanley and Tyler Linderbaum left the game due to lower leg injuries. I think it’s safe to say that without their starting running back and potentially two star offensive linemen, this running game could struggle. And without one of the leaders of the defensive backfield, the Ravens secondary could be in for some more tough times.

On top of all this, Lamar Jackson looked straight up terrible against a bad Texans team. He was careless with the football, inaccurate with his passes, and ineffective on the ground.

But it’s not all doom and gloom in the Charm City. Zay Flowers looked electric in his NFL debut, and their front seven is still elite. Those are about the only two positives I have for this team right now. 

11 – Bengals (0-1)

I don’t have many words for the Bengals this week. There’s just nothing I can say. This is their annual disasterclass in Cleveland. I’m not going to overreact like I’m sure many will. I’m just going to acknowledge this yearly occurrence and I’m going to move forward. 

12 – Jets (1-0)

I don’t think I have ever seen such a bittersweet few hours for a team like the Jets had on Monday night.

The Aaron Rodgers era lasted four plays. It’s next-level heartbreak for a franchise that has endured it for far too long. I’m devastated for those fans that created one of the most incredible environments I’ve seen in an NFL game in a long time.

But through all that, the Jets came out and played their asses off. It was an incredibly inspiring performance, predominantly defensively. They backed up all the hype on that side of the ball with an amazing showing — dominating at every level to the tune of 16 points allowed and 4 turnovers generated. The secondary had Josh Allen seeing ghosts as Jordan Whitehead picked him off three times. The front looked like one of the best in football. And we can never forget the special teams winning it in overtime with Xavier Gipson’s punt return touchdown.

But now we must look to the future. Unfortunately for New York, that’s another season of Zach Wilson, barring a likely move for a quarterback. Garrett Wilson — who made one of the best catches I’ve ever seen — Breece Hall, and Dalvin Cook all looked great on Monday night, but Wilson proved that he’s still the same old bust. I think the Jets should definitely search for an alternative; I just have no idea what that alternative would be.

This performance signified what these Jets are capable of: winning a Super Bowl. But they’ll never do that with Wilson. They might not do it at all without Rodgers. They might not even make the playoffs. That is sports cruelty at its finest. 

13 – Bills (0-1)

I’m really never wrong.

Josh Allen’s turnovers have been a problem for so long now, and I’ve been talking about how that’s a massive problem since last year. It’s a miracle that it took this performance to people to realize it. He’s as careless as any quarterback in the NFL — which includes the likes of Zach Wilson, who he just lost to. He makes terrible decisions both throwing and running the ball, and he actively holds his team back. Spoiler alert: that means the Bills are going nowhere fast with his shenanigans. People love to place the blame on the lack of a run game or a bad offensive line, which isn’t exactly unwarranted. But because Allen makes some flashy throws and hurdles over a defender every once in a while we ignore the fact that he’s just as big of a problem as any on this Buffalo team.

With a distinct lack of offensive talent and clear defensive struggles on the way, I think the Bills could firmly be in a position to take the step back that I thought they would. 

14 – Rams (1-0)

I truly never could have seen that coming.

I said this team was the worst in the league. I said they’d suffer the worst defeat of the week. I have been eviscerating them for months. I said Matthew Stafford was cooked. For them to go out and simply dominate the way they did makes me seem really, really silly.

The Rams haven’t looked that good on either side of the ball since the Super Bowl. I honestly don’t know how we got here. Stafford looked like his Super Bowl self, Puka Nacua of all people stepped up as the Cooper Kupp replacement, Kyren Williams had himself a day, and the defense absolutely locked up one of the best offenses in football.

I have no idea if this is who the Rams are or if this is just a fluke. But they deserve my respect this week. Let’s just hope my preseason prediction doesn’t end up as the single worst take of my career. 

15 – Seahawks (0-1)

Here’s a new Power Rankings addition for the 2023 season: every week, I will make one team my Shamed Team of the Week and simply not talk about them because of how ashamed I am of them.

Week 1’s honor goes to none other than the Seattle Seahawks, who were embarrassed at home by the team I said was the worst in football and didn’t have its best offensive player. Congrats on being the first winners of this award, Seattle!

16 – Browns (1-0)

The Browns are such a weird team. For 16 games of the year, they look incompetent. But for that one home game against the Bengals, they pull out all the stops. Their defense turns into the ’85 Bears while their offense does what they need to do for a blowout win. The fact that this keeps happening is just weird.

Sunday’s win marks the ninth win in the last 11 games in Cleveland against the Bengals, including the last four against Joe Burrow. Like the Rams, I don’t know if this is who the Browns actually are, or if this is just a one game thing. But also like the Rams, I’m going to put some resect on them for now. 

17 – Falcons (1-0)

Solid showing, Atlanta. It was as formulaic as it gets for you guys. And that’s a pretty solid formula.

The Falcons looked exactly how we expected them to look, if not better. That certainly increases my confidence in this team. The running game thrived with Bijan Robinson and Tyler Allgeier, and Robinson made incredible plays in the passing game. The defense also looked drastically improved with some solid plays made up front and newcomer Jessie Bates snagging two interceptions.

But those were the expected improvements. Everyone was waiting to see what Desmond Ridder would look like, and while most people expected a step in the right direction, I was vindicated on my steadfast take that he is simply not good. There was a time where he had four completions for zero yards. Zero! You can’t even blame the scheme for that. And it’s definitely not like this offense isn’t talented. There are teams that would love to have Drake London, Kyle Pitts, or Bijan Robinson. Ridder has all three at his disposal! He’s just not a starting quarterback, let alone a franchise quarterback.

The Falcons have their guys everywhere else, which could take them places this season. But they need to address the quarterback position ASAP.

18 – Patriots (0-1)

As far as moral victories go, that was the best win of the week.

New England should feel great about their defense performance against one of the league’s top offense, as well as their own passing offense’s numbers against one of 2022’s best secondaries. Mac Jones played what was probably his best game since his rookie season with over 300 yards and 3 touchdowns. He did throw a game-changing pick six, but it was off his receiver’s hands while rain poured down, so I’m giving him a very slight pass.

But I think the Patriots probably feel as good as possible considering the fact that they lost the game. I think there’s some very big positives to take away from Sunday. And with Buffalo reeling and New York losing its star quarterback, this division could be wide open. Don’t count out these Patriots. 

19 – Steelers (0-1)

The Steelers very nearly got the award that the Seahawks got, but then I remembered that Pittsburgh lost to the team I said was the best in the NFL while Seattle lost to the team I said was the worst in the NFL. So Mike Tomlin’s boys are off the hook in that regard. They are not off the hook in any other regard, however. Because that was really, really embarrassing.

The Steelers never lay duds like that at home, especially not with tons of hype and expectation surrounding them. They’re supposed to be the team that plays up to their opponents. They’re not the team that lays down and dies for sixty minutes, including a nearly 30-minute stretch where they could only muster one yard of offense. One yard! I don’t care whose defense you’re up against, that’s simply inexcusable. I’ve said it a million times — I don’t know how or why Matt Canada is still on this staff. The offense has plenty of young talent that could be so much more than they currently are, but they’ll never get there under Canada. It doesn’t help that Diontae Johnson ripped his hamstring in two on Sunday and is likely going to miss extended time.

Here are the positives for the Steelers: T.J. Watt is a superhuman coming off the edge and Minkah Fitzpatrick is still the best safety in the NFL. But once you look at the rest of the defense, the negatives creep back in. Cam Hayward is going to miss extended time with a groin injury. Patrick Peterson looked every bit like a 33-year old cornerback on his way out of the league. And the rest of the secondary clearly has the same problems that have plagued them for so long.

Perhaps we were a bit premature in declaring the Steelers’ ability to be anything but mid for the millionth straight year. 

20 – Commanders (1-0)

A win is a win. It wasn’t pretty by any means — in fact it was rather ugly — but it’s a win. And for the fans of this city and everyone else involved that showed up and showed out on Sunday, that feels really, really good.

Of course I have my concerns. The offensive line is just about as putrid as expected. Sam Howell clearly still has some things to work on. The run game wasn’t great. The receivers need to get more involved. Ball security is a real issue — Antonio Gibson should honestly be RB3 on the depth chart at this point. But when the going got tough, the offense pulled themselves up and made every play they needed to in order to come away with a win, and a lot of that was on Howell’s shoulders. His poise and his confidence never got rattled despite the struggles and getting headhunted by the Cardinals defense. That is something that I absolutely love to see.

But what really won us that game was the defense, which we should all come to expect at this point. The front was absolutely dominant. Daron Payne and Jonathan Allen completely gobbled up the interior. Montez Sweat was far and away the best player on the field and truly won the game with the fourth quarter forced fumble. The secondary held up for the most part with Darrick Forrest and Kam Curl continuing to prove themselves as one of the best safety duos in the league. And Emmanuel Forbes poetically made the game-winning PBU to usher in the new era of Washington football with a 1-0 start in front of a sold out home crowd.

Like I said, that feels really good. 

21 – Buccaneers (1-0)

One thing about Baker Mayfield: that dude is going to compete his tail off, no matter what. There’s not many built like him in this league. It’s honestly inspiring to watch some of the stuff he does. It almost makes up for his lack of ability as a quarterback. But when you’re playing the Vikings defense, you can get away with those deficiencies.

In the second half, the Bucs went on drives of 15, 10, and 10 plays — the last of which iced the game. That’s incredible for a team who looked inept at offense with Tom Brady at the helm the last time we saw them. I was also very impressed with the defensive effort from Tampa Bay. I kind of wrote that unit off, but they did their thing against a pretty good offense. They let up a lot of yards and chunk plays, but when the stops needed to be made, they got them, and Christian Izien’s redzone interception of Kirk Cousins was really the difference in the game. In a division with young quarterbacks and the very bad Derek Carr, I think this defense can rise to the occasion and be the reason the team wins games. We’ll see if these types of efforts can continue. 

22 – Vikings (0-1)

I told you so. Regression to the mean. The Vikings were 11-0 in one-score games last year. They’re 0-1 in such contests to start 2023. That’s really all that needs to be said.

This team got extremely lucky in so many key spots last year. That luck won’t be with them throughout this season. Their flaws will be exposed. Their defense will lose them games like they did on Sunday. The offense is bound to make mistakes like Kirk Cousins’ redzone interception. Justin Jefferson will look very sad on the sideline despite putting up monster numbers. This is who the Vikings are. And there’s no more masquerade. 

23 – Saints (1-0)

That was about as unimpressive a win as I’ve ever seen. Probably because they didn’t deserve to win. The Titans should have and would have won if the referees didn’t blow a scoop-and-score dead, but such is life in the NFL.

Still, I feel worse about the Saints now than I did last week, largely because Derek Carr looked pretty awful for the most part. A lot of that will get overshadowed by guys like Chris Olave making plays and the passing game putting up numbers, but man. All the problems he had down the stretch in Vegas are already showing in New Orleans. I know 300 yards is nothing to scoff at, but the tape certainly isn’t inspiring. And neither is the offensive line.

But if the Saints are going to do this in every game this season, I still like their chances. The defense looked pretty good, albeit against perhaps the worst starting QB in the NFL at this point. Their new kicker Blake Grupe is clearly ready. And they shored up across the board when they needed to. I guess that’s all you can ask for.

24 – Raiders (1-0)

Jimmy Garoppolo is bring his winning ways to the desert. Okay, maybe not, but 1-0 with a road win over a divisional opponent is a good start.

Jimmy didn’t look half bad, though. He was accurate other than a tough interception in the endzone, had a strangely great repertoire with Jakobi Meyers, and made two really nice touchdown throws. The defense also played a very nice game, but I’m taking that with a grain of salt considering they were going up against the mighty Broncos offense. And I’m also going not going to overreact to a poor rushing performance from Josh Jacobs considering the quality of defense he was going up against.

At the end of the day, I was pleasantly surprised with what I saw. I hope Meyers — who is in concussion protocol after getting absolutely crunched by Justin Simmons — is okay, because if Sunday was any indication, the Raiders could have a sneaky good WR duo with him and Davante Adams. 

25 – Titans (0-1)

For the sake of anyone and everyone who watches the Titans, can we please move on from Ryan Tannehill? He’s 35 years old, his best years are long behind him, and this offense is going absolutely nowhere with him under center. You have not one, but two young QBs who could greatly benefit from getting the reps. Just give the offense to them instead. Because they’re absolutely unwatchable as it currently stands.

I will say that this is exactly what I expected from Tennessee: a dreadful offense with a solid defense. Their front had a solid game with four sacks and great run defense, but the secondary got torched. If that problem persists and the offense doesn’t wake the hell up, the Titans could end up being even worse than I imagined. 

26 – Broncos (0-1)

Here’s the Broncos’ week summed up perfectly: Russell Wilson looked vastly improved and still only threw for 177 yards on a drab 5.2 yards per completion as the offense put up just 16 points — with just a single field goal coming in the second half — and lost to the Raiders by a point. You can change the head coach, you can talk all you want, but at the end of the day, these are clearly the same Denver Broncos.

The good news is that the defense is still great. But nothing they do can make up for the offensive shortcomings. They’re the reason that the Broncos were in that game late, but they couldn’t get the stops they needed to prevent the Raiders from icing the game away late in the fourth quarter. There’s simply no reason to believe that anyone involved in this operation is capable of turning this disaster around. The Denver Broncos are in football purgatory. 

27 – Colts (0-1)

All things considered, that went pretty well.

The Colts didn’t have the world’s best opener in the world, but I think they have to like what they saw. Anthony Richardson had himself a nice game, looking sharp while notching a rushing and passing touchdown. I think Colts fans everywhere would have liked to see him protect himself a bit more, but that’s what you’re going to get with Richardson. Michael Pittman played a fantastic game, which helped out the young quarterback. But running game was atrocious as they only picked up 2.5 yards per carry and Deon Jackson ran for 14 yards on 13 carries in his first game at RB1 in Jonathan Taylor’s absence. Nobody is going to win football games with a running game that poor.

The defense wasn’t great either as they got cut up all game long. They had one real good play, but it was on the wacky non-dead ball play that the Jaguars essentially gifted them. That side of the ball figures to continue its struggles as well.

But, it’s like I keep saying: the most important thing is Richardson’s development. I think there’s a lot of positives to take away from his performance on Sunday.

28 – Panthers (0-1)

I’m very disappointed in the Panthers. They truly have everything they need to be a solid team, but they looked completely discombobulated on Sunday.

I understand that there’s a lot of new pieces and moving parts on this offense and that the offensive line is still coming together, but man. That was really bad. I think if Bryce Young didn’t throw those interceptions, the Panthers could have had a real shot to win the game. Their defense balled out, only holding the Falcons to 221 yards of offense and completely shutting down the Falcons passing game — which is admittedly abhorrent. But when you’re -3 in the turnover battle, you’re simply not going to win games.

I’m expecting a lot more growing pains on both sides of the ball in Carolina.  

29 – Giants (0-1)

Good lord. I don’t even know what to say. I don’t even know if the Giants have deserved being talked about this week. I guess I’ll keep this brief.

That was simply one of the most embarrassing, lifeless performances I have ever seen in any sport at any level. And that’s coming from someone who saw the Giants come into my team’s building and beat us 40-0. At least we were in the middle of a lost season and starting Mark damn Sanchez.

New York has no excuses. They talked so much about how they deserve to be respected after last year’s complete fugazi season and how Daniel Jones is actually good and worth the money. All of that got completely and expeditiously flushed on Sunday night. Jones was the worst quarterback in football this week, the offensive line looked absolutely dreadful, the offense as a whole still lacked any semblance of a pulse, and the defense might as well have not shown up. 

It’s going to be a long, steep uphill climb to gaining anyone’s respect back. 

30 – Cardinals (0-1)

The Cardinals completely met my expectations on Sunday. The only area where they surprised me was their ability to wreak havoc in the backfield, as they racked up six sacks including a strip sack returned for a touchdown right before halftime. But I don’t know how much that means when you consider how awful the Commanders offensive line is.

Their own offense looked pretty terrible, but we all saw that coming. Josh Dobbs is good enough to keep this thing from going off the rails, but that unit isn’t going anywhere.

My biggest takeaway from Week 1 for the Cardinals is that my take that they’ll be competitive enough to not be the worst team in the league has been vindicated. Jonathan Gannon is building a team that isn’t going to go down easy. Whether thats via actually good defense or dirty play and headhunting remains to be seen.

31 – Texans (0-1)

The Texans looked about as awful as expected on Sunday. I considered putting them last, but at least they met expectations. Some teams are supposed to look competent and end up playing like the worst team in football.

Houston didn’t score a single touchdown on Sunday, being one of three teams to bear that shame. But at least they have the excuse of playing one of the best defenses in football. For what it’s worth, C.J. Stroud was actually the better quarterback in the game, at least statistically. He had more completions and yards than Lamar Jackson while having less turnovers. On top of that, nine different players recorded a catch — 10 if you include Stroud catching his first career completion off of a deflection.

The Texans defense really made Lamar struggle thanks to the performances of young guys like Will Anderson Jr and Christian Harris, who each notched a sack. That’s certainly a positive to take away from this game. They definitely have some burgeoning talent on both sides of the ball.

32 – Bears (0-1)

So much for the hype.

The Bears proved to all of us that they are still the sorry little franchise that they’ve been this whole time. No amount of preseason media narratives or splash acquisitions are going to change that. They were absolutely dreadful on both sides of the ball at home against a team with a bunch of moving parts without its WR1. There is zero excuse for that.

I am still not going to give up on Justin Fields, but man. We have to see it sooner or later. I don’t think Chicago’s struggles on Sunday were entirely his fault seeing as though he was running for his life for the entire game, but he certainly didn’t play well. And that figures to be a trend moving forward. It’s like a positive feedback loop — the offensive line will continue to get decimated meaning that Fields will continue to look bad, and the cycle isn’t stopping any time soon.

Someone please save him.


All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 18 Power Rankings

With the regular season in the books, the final Power Rankings of the year provide an insight into how the playoff contestants stack up as well as some reflection on the seasons of those who didn’t make the dance.

Cover photo taken from NFL.com.

1 – Bengals (12-4)

The Cincinnati Bengals are my top team at the end of the 2022 season, but I don’t know if they have ever felt more vulnerable. Their offensive line, which has previously been so solid all year long, has lost two of its most key pieces in Alex Cappa and La’el Collins in the last three weeks. So, there’s a better chance than not that we see Joe Burrow under duress just as much as he was during last year’s playoff run. That being said, I still trust Burrow and the Bengals offense under any and all circumstances, and I still trust this defense. They have plenty of experience from last year and feel determined to make amends. Their injuries could come back to bite them, but as it stands, they are my Super Bowl favorites.

2 – Chiefs (14-3)

Kansas City ended their season far more emphatically than I pictured they would. They destroyed the Raiders on the road in one of their more convincing performances on the season. They barely had to do anything offensively to separate themselves. They didn’t have the flashiest game in the world, but it didn’t matter. This team simply kills you with a thousand paper cuts. Patrick Mahomes continues to be masterful, and the defense is carrying some nice momentum into the first round bye with back to back great performances, especially in the secondary. While there’s no guarantee of the Chiefs getting multiple home playoff games, they are extremely worthy of being the betting favorites to win it all. They are the team to beat in the NFL.

3 – 49ers (13-4)

The 49ers are the best team in the NFC. They might just be the best team in the league. With every passing week, they look better and better on both sides of the ball. I already have no idea how anyone is supposed to move the ball on their defense, but now I don’t know who can stop their offense. Brock Purdy continues to play better and better, and they just have too many weapons to account for. And now, Deebo Samuel is finally back. So is Elijah Mitchell, who provides an entirely different element to the already deadly backfield. This team is absolutely horrifying, even if they’re not the 1 seed. With the way the other NFC contenders have performed in the last month or so, I would genuinely be shocked if the Niners didn’t make it to Glendale in a month’s time.

4 – Bills (13-3)

I said last week that the Bills had the chance to give us one of the greatest sights in sports history. And they did just that. Buffalo was absolutely electric from start to finish in an inspiring win for Damar Hamlin to lock up the 2 seed and ensure that the AFC Championship be played at a neutral site if this team plays Kansas City. It also ensured a much easier first round matchup. While I think Buffalo could have played a better game defensively, Josh Allen was awesome from start to finish, launching the ball all over the place and making highlight throw after highlight throw. We saw the Bills get hot at the end of last year and carry that momentum into two great playoff games on offense. I wouldn’t be shocked if we see the exact same thing happen again in the coming weeks.

5 – Eagles (14-3)

Despite getting Jalen Hurts back, the Eagles looked quite sluggish once again on Sunday. They did not play a great game by any means, but still won convincingly over the Giants backups. They did clinch the 1 seed, and I think they will really benefit from having a first round bye. We could see the Birds in two weeks come out scorching hot offensively. At the same time, we could see a repeat of Sunday’s performance lead to an early exit. Both seem entirely possible, but I have a bit more faith in the former actually happening. This team is too talented across the board to get complacent, especially after clinching the top seed. Their second round matchup will be the most important factor. If it’s the Giants or Cowboys, then they should be fine. But if it’s Tom Brady and the Bucs, they might be in trouble.

6 – Chargers (10-7) 1

The Chargers weren’t as cautious with their starters as I thought they would be on Sunday, but Brandon Staley did eventually pull Justin Herbert and company out of the game in the fourth quarter. However, it wasn’t before Mike Williams sustained an injury that could potentially keep him out of the Wild Card game in Jacksonville. That mistake could prove to be extremely costly for LA; we saw how their offense looked when they weren’t at full strength, and that’s not something this team can afford to revisit. However, the Chargers are getting some good injury news as Rashawn Slater could return to the team if they were to beat the Jaguars on Saturday night. The offensive line has played very well in his absence, but getting one of the best LTs in football back obviously provides a massive boost to the offense. In any case, it will be tough for the Chargers to go on the road and win in Herbert’s playoff debut. But we all know he’s capable of getting the job done.

7 – Jaguars (9-8) 1

We all know the Jags didn’t play their best game on Saturday night in a de facto playoff game. But I think that was expected. I told you all that it would be close despite the Titans’ QB situation. It was a combination of their coaching and the jitters of Jacksonville. I’m not shocked at all that they struggled for so long and needed a big break in the game’s waning moments to clinch their playoff spot. But I think that getting those jitters out of the way will be extremely helpful for this team as they head into a very tough playoff matchup with the Chargers. They will likely play a lot more relaxed and look like the Jags of December again.

8 – Cowboys (12-5) 2

Yeesh. For a team that could have wound up as the 1 seed by Sunday night, the Cowboys put up one of the most pathetic performances you will ever see. I don’t think I’ve truly realized how sad it was. To play a team playing a 3rd string QB with absolutely nothing to play for and virtually not show up is just embarrassing. Dak Prescott played perhaps the worst game of his professional career and the rest of the offense never got off the plane. The defense couldn’t stop a Commanders offense starting a plethora of backups. It was just an abomination from start to finish. It’s hard to tell if this is who the Cowboys are going into the playoffs, but it inspires little to no confidence ahead of a road matchup against Tom Brady, who has never lost to Dallas in his life.

9 – Vikings (13-4)

As I said last week, the Vikings didn’t have to do much to beat a Bears team that was essentially playing to lose to be handed the #1 pick in the draft. I still have my reservations about this team, but it was nice to see them close out a great regular season with a rare convincing victory. Minnesota was able to get their starters some rest ahead of a pretty tough matchup next week with a Giants team that also rested their starters on Sunday. Their game a few weeks ago was pretty close, and anything can happen in the rematch, but I’ll get more into that later this week.

10 – Lions (9-8)

The Lions may have missed out on the playoffs, but they won all of our hearts this season. They finished the season on a 7-2 tear after a poor 2-6 start, beating playoff teams and crushing playoff dreams left and right. Sunday night’s win in Lambeau was simply awesome to see, and it’s so cool that NFL fans can rally around this team like we have in recent weeks. I can’t wait to see what they have in store moving forward. I can only hope that they don’t mess it up in typical Detroit fashion, because this is one of my absolute favorite teams in the league right now, and I don’t want them to go away.

11 – Giants (9-7-1)

The Giants knew they were locked into the 6 seed and rested their starters accordingly. It would be vastly unfair to move them up or down after that. I actually like their chances going to Minnesota to play a team they nearly just beat in the very same building. It’s one of the more interesting matchups of the weekend, but like I said, I’ll get into it more later this week.

12 – Buccaneers (8-9) 3

Since they were locked into the 4 seed, the Buccaneers only played their starters for a few drives on Sunday in Atlanta before letting their backups get some reps in a meaningless loss. Thus, Tampa is the only playoff team with a losing record. You might as well throw that out the window, because having Tom Brady in the playoffs is enough to make the Bucs absolutely horrify me. I don’t know what this team has in store for the postseason considering how up and down they’ve been all year long, but if #12 plays like he did to close out the year and the defense steps up like they seemingly always do, then we could be in for some more playoff magic.

13 – Steelers (9-8) 1

Kudos to the Steelers for finishing the season so strong. Like the Lions, they closed out the year 7-2 after starting 2-6 to ensure that Mike Tomlin has still never finished a season with a losing record. By all means, Pittsburgh deserves to be the 7 seed in the AFC. However, the chips just didn’t fall their way. I’m still impressed with this team. They made something out of nothing time and time again, and while I have no idea what to make of their future, perhaps the pieces are there to return to their typical status. Kenny Pickett will continue to develop into a fine young QB, and the defense will keep balling out. If they can get some offensive weapons, then I’ll have high hopes for the Steelers in 2023.

14 – Dolphins (9-8) 1

The Dolphins have snuck into the playoffs as the 7 seed to every NFL fan’s dismay. If they had Tua Tagovailoa suiting up to play QB, we’d all be enticed by their matchup with the Bills on Sunday. Alas, it will be Skylar Thompson once again, and since they’re not playing the Joe Flacco-led Jets, they will get curbstomped. It’s not going to be pretty. I wish we could have seen this team at full strength in the postseason, but they only have themselves to blame for their shortcomings. Perhaps in 2023 they won’t fall apart as drastically as they did this year.

15 – Seahawks (9-8) 2

It wasn’t pretty by any means, but the Seahawks did their job on Sunday by beating the Rams and getting some help from the Lions in order to sneak into the playoffs as the NFC’s 7 seed. This may be a postseason team, but I still don’t feel great about them. They looked very sloppy against LA and realistically should have lost if Baker Mayfield didn’t hand them the ball over and over again. Geno Smith is still very careless with the ball and isn’t playing nearly as precise as he was to start the year. The run game was chugging, which is a good sign, but we all know this offense isn’t going to do a damn thing against the 49ers defense. I expect their postseason to stay to be extremely brief.

16 – Ravens (10-7)

That’s right. I think the Ravens are the single worst team in the playoff field. It’s largely due to their QB situation, but I also just haven’t liked what this team has been doing all year long. While I believe their defense has been very good since Roquan Smith came over from Chicago, their offense has been a complete mess, and the defense can’t make up for that. If Anthony Brown is the starting QB once again on Sunday in Cincinnati, then the Ravens don’t stand a chance. If it’s Tyler Huntley under center, then perhaps they can hang around for a bit. If Lamar Jackson returns, then they could definitely win, but that’s just too unlikely at this point. That means their offense is going to continue looking like a JV team. The defense might be able to stifle the Bengals’ high flying offense, but will it be enough? I doubt it.

17 – Packers (8-9) 5

I have no desire to talk about the Packers. To have their season ended at home for the third straight time after laying the third straight dud is just embarrassing. Aaron Rodgers once again checked out of the game and looked absolutely pathetic down the stretch. He is definitely leaving Green Bay, but that’s another story. Sunday night was simply another indictment on the Matt LaFleur era for the Packers. They were unprepared, poorly coached, made stupid decisions on and off the field and paid the price for it. That’s all this team has done in the last ten years. Nobody should be remotely surprised anymore.

18 – Patriots (8-9)

The Patriots were about as competitive as I expected them to be on Sunday, but just as I predicted, it was all for naught. For every positive, there was a negative, especially when it came to Mac Jones. He had some nice throws and wound up with three touchdown passes, but also had some pretty bad ones and threw two picks. The run game looked pretty solid at times, but they simply couldn’t rely on the run game once they got down. Perhaps the most disappointing thing was the defensive performance by a team that has prided itself on making plays on that side of the ball. They were pretty awful from start to finish, as was the special teams, which allowed two kick return touchdowns. It was simply a Murphy’s Law type of game for the Patriots, which is a pretty fitting ending to a season where so much has gone wrong.

19 – Commanders (8-8-1) 4

I have no remote idea where any of that came from, but I love it. I absolutely love this team showing a ton of fight to close out a tough season. I love beating the brakes off the Cowboys. I love the team and the fanbase rallying around Sam Howell going into next year. I love the defense showing up and showing out. I love FedEx rocking in a psuedo-primetime setting. I would have loved to see this type of energy in recent weeks when the season still could have amounted to something, but I’m not complaining. This is going to be a very weird offseason, and I have no idea what 2023 holds for this team or this franchise. But I’m going to enjoy the way 2022 came to a close after so many weeks of sadness.

20 – Panthers (7-10) 4

The Panthers had one of the strangest seasons of any team in the league. They were perhaps the worst team in the league through two months, then turned it around and were a few plays away from making the playoffs. Now, they enter an offseason where they need to find a QB and may need to find a new head coach as well. I think Steve Wilks has done enough to retain the job, just as I felt about Rich Bisaccia last year in Vegas. We all saw how replacing him worked out for the Raiders. If the Panthers can find a QB in the draft or free agency, they can definitely be a fun young team under Wilks next year. I just hope for their sake that they make the right decisions.

21 – Saints (7-10) 2

Like their NFC South counterparts above them, the Saints had a very strange 2022 season. They were bad, then good, then bad, then good, then bad again. Now, they enter a nightmare free agency period where they are almost sure to lose a ton of talent while not having much draft capital to work with. 2023 could be a year where the Saints are one of the worst teams in the league, regardless of who their head coach is. Dennis Allen should be fired by all means, but I don’t think any coach can salvage the absolute mess that New Orleans will be in a few months time.

22 – Raiders (6-11) 2

In a microcosm of their entire season, the Raiders looked much worse on Saturday than I thought they would. Like so many other teams in this range, Las Vegas enters a very strange offseason with a ton of questions. Derek Carr is almost certainly on his way out, but the team sits in a position where they can make a play for a top QB in the draft. Perhaps they try to fill the position through free agency; a certain GOAT has been linked to the franchise due to his preexisting relationship with the head coach. Regardless, there are a lot more problems here than just the QB position. The defense is still going to be an absolute mess, and Josh Jacobs is likely going to leave. It’s going to be a long year ahead for a team that only endures long years.

23 – Jets (7-10) 2

The second half of the season couldn’t have gone any worse for the Jets. Going from 6-3 to 7-10 and losing the final six games of the year is simply inexcusable, even by Jets standards. Their QB play was abysmal down the stretch, and injuries unfortunately got the better of them. I don’t think this season is a failure by any means, in fact, this team overachieved more than anything else. They should feel great about their fantastic rookie class and phenomenal young pieces moving forward. The most important thing is finding a QB this offseason, and with a solid young roster, I think the Jets will have plenty of suitors.

24 – Browns (7-10) 2

It’s safe to say that the Browns vastly underperformed this season. It’s rather shocking that they were clearly better with Jacoby Brissett at QB than Deshaun Watson. That will likely change next year, but I’m not sure if that’s a guarantee. We’ll see what happens. This is a solid roster from top to bottom that can’t afford to underachieve again. I would love to see that though.

25 – Titans (7-10)

The Titans did exactly what I thought they were going to do on Saturday night. They were competitive from start to finish and their poor QB play cost them the game and the division. It was extremely obvious. Now, Tennessee is faced with a ton of questions going into what is sure to be a weird offseason. The QB position isn’t entirely settled and the WR group is rather pitiful. They better hope to revamp the offense to be vastly better than the unit that let them down in such a big way in 2022. I trust Mike Vrabel to get the job done, but they better hope that whichever GM they hire can do it as well.

26 – Rams (5-12)

Simply put, the 2022 Rams were the worst defending champions I have ever seen. You can blame it on their awful injury luck, but they were pretty bad even before that. This team has no future at all, and now Sean McVay might be stepping down. They are all sorts of screwed if that ends up happening. They have no picks and are in cap hell, so good luck to whoever inherits this absolute mess of a franchise after he’s gone. Like the Saints, this doesn’t seem like a salvageable situation.

27 – Broncos (5-12) 1

Good for the Broncos to close out such a tough season with a nice win at home against a division rival. I could tell how much it meant to Russell Wilson, the team, and the fans. Perhaps Denver can carry this momentum into next year. It will certainly be tough with limited draft capital and a limited offensive roster. This team will simply go as far as Russ and whichever HC they hire can take them. That doesn’t inspire a ton of confidence, but perhaps the Broncos have what it takes to do a 180 in 2023.

28 – Falcons (7-10) 1

All things considered, a 7-win season should be considered as a massive success for the Falcons. This team is absolute garbage and got hammered with injuries and bad luck all year long and still managed to finish the year a game out of first place. That’s remarkable. I like what Arthur Smith is cooking in Atlanta, and I think that this team can produce a fruitful future if they play their cards right this offseason. They have to nail free agency and the draft, and they better hope that they can find a QB. I hate to say it, but Desmond Ridder is simply not going to be the guy moving forward.

29 – Texans (3-13-1) 2

Congratulations, Texans! You just fumbled one of the most un-fumble-able bags in the history of the sport! You now have to watch as someone (perhaps a division rival) jumps you for the QB you so desperately craved to save your franchise! And for what? I understand that this is a professional football team and they’re not just going to go out there and throw a game, but come on. The #2 pick is still a good place to be in with two great QBs atop this draft class, but not having the top selection is definitely going to sting. I don’t see Houston making a play for #1, so they’ll have to roll with whatever their plan B is. And they only have themselves to blame.

30 – Cardinals (4-13) 1

When I got the notification that Kliff Kingsbury had been fired, I audibly cheered. I had been waiting for that for far too long. He had no business being an NFL head coach, and this franchise deserved better. Perhaps his replacement can forge an actual relationship with the franchise QB that they paid $250 million. Regardless of whether that happens, I have a bad feeling that the Cards will continue to be in a tough spot moving forward. This is not a very good roster, and their best players on either side of the ball are going to leave as JJ Watt retires and DeAndre Hopkins wants a trade. Not to mention Kyler Murray likely won’t be ready to start at the beginning of next season. I’m penciling in Arizona as one of the frontrunners for the top pick in 2024.

31 – Colts (4-12-1) 1

By losing to the Texans, the Colts cemented themselves as the worst team in the AFC. That’s a pretty hilarious statement considering this team is now in prime position to jump the Texans to take the #1 pick in the draft and steal whichever QB their division rivals wanted to pick. If/when the Colts get their franchise QB, they should be in a solid spot moving forward. This is a solid roster that was drastically held back by QB play, injuries, and coaching in 2022. With a young star QB that inherits Jonathan Taylor, Michael Pittman Jr., and a great defense, as well as a coach not named Jeff Saturday, they can definitely turn things around next year as long as they keep their key players on the roster.

32 – Bears (3-14)

Congrats to the Bears for somehow falling ass backwards into the #1 pick in the Draft. I’m actually really happy for them, seeing as they can now flip that pick into infinitely more draft capital in a trade with some other team in the top 5-10 that desperately needs a franchise QB. Chicago already has their guy in Justin Fields, all they need to do is trade back, take a defensive lineman/edge rusher, and use their extra picks as well as their league-leading $100 million of cap space to continue building around their young star QB. This is going to be one of the most important offseasons in the history of the franchise, and I don’t say that lightly. If Chicago makes all the right moves, they will be right back in the thick of things in the years to come. If they don’t, they might never return to the glory days.

All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 17 Power Rankings

One of the scariest, most devastating weeks in NFL history has shaken the sports world to its core. Out of respect, these Power Rankings are the list of teams and nothing more.

Cover photo taken from The New Yorker.

This has been the most difficult week of sports in my life. The incident with Buffalo Bills safety Damar Hamlin shook me to my core, as it did for anyone who watched it or heard about it. It has made me take a step back and reflect on how this is really just a game. And it took me a while to come back and remember that there are still games left to be played. Both out of respect for Hamlin and because of my own personal feelings at the moment, I don’t find it appropriate to be talking about the games when his life is on the line. That’s why this week’s Power Rankings have taken until the end of the week to come out, and why I won’t be writing about any of the teams or games from Week 17. Tomorrow’s Picks will be as normal as they can be, but for now, here’s my Power Rankings in their most bare form as we head into to the final week of the 2022 NFL season.

1 – Bengals (11-4) 1

2 – Chiefs (13-3) 1

3 – 49ers (12-4) 1

4 – Bills (12-3) 1

5 – Eagles (13-3) 4

6 – Cowboys (12-4)

7 – Chargers (10-6)

8 – Jaguars (8-8) 1

9 – Vikings (12-4) 1

10 – Lions (8-8) 2

11 – Giants (9-6-1) 3

12 – Packers (8-8) 5

13 – Dolphins (8-8) 3

14 – Steelers (8-8) 4

15 – Buccaneers (8-8) 5

16 – Ravens (10-6) 5

17 – Seahawks (8-8) 4

18 – Patriots (8-8) 4

19 – Saints (7-9) 5

20 – Raiders (6-10) 1

21 – Jets (7-9) 8

22 – Browns (7-9) 3

23 – Commanders (7-8-1) 8

24 – Panthers (6-10) 8

25 – Titans (7-9) 2

26 – Rams (5-11)

27 – Falcons (6-10)

28 – Broncos (4-12) 2

29 – Cardinals (4-12) 1

30 – Colts (4-11-1) 1

31 – Texans (2-13-1)

32 – Bears (3-13)

Post-Week 16 Power Rankings

Christmas weekend did not disappoint as both the Power Rankings and the playoff picture continue to get messier. With two weeks to go in the regular season, anything can happen.

Cover photo taken from CBS 17.

1 – Eagles (13-2)

Can anyone provide me a valid reason why I should move the Eagles down this week? They went on the road with a backup QB and lost by 6 in a shootout against one of the best teams in the conference that just so happens to be their division rival. That says something. Gardner Minshew did his thing, and I have no doubt that the Eagles will win out regardless of whether or not Jalen Hurts returns before the playoffs. However, I do have one concern with Saturday’s performance by Philly. Their defense got absolutely gashed, especially through the air, and gave up a lot of head-scratching plays. They did make some nice plays of their own, but they broke down when the game was on the line. Injuries have shaken them up a little bit, and they can’t afford another performance like this in January.

2 – Bengals (11-4)

I seriously considered moving the Bengals down a notch this week, but it didn’t feel right. As I always say, getting out to a huge lead and then letting up a little is only natural. It happens to everyone in this league. This team never trailed, was firing on all cylinders in the first half, and let some complacency and injuries make it close in the end. But guess what? They still made every play to win the game, highlighted by the fumble recovery in their own redzone to seal it. Joe Burrow put together another masterful performance despite the offensive line falling apart around him, but whether or not that can continue is going to determine the outcome of this season for Cincinnati. We’ve seen Joe pull rabbits out of hats with a makeshift OL before, but we’ve also seen that be this team’s undoing. They could be in for a rude awakening if they let those injuries get the best of them, especially with the defense still in recovery.

3 – Chiefs (12-3)

I’ll give the Chiefs a ton of credit for playing much better defensively than I expected them to on Saturday. They had the Seahawks completely locked up from start to finish and never wavered on either side of the ball. Patrick Mahomes played a tremendous game, once again putting the team on his back, and has all but secured this year’s MVP. The defense was relentless in getting after the passer, and the secondary played their best game in weeks against a very solid WR group. It was a performance that inspired a ton of confidence in this team as we head towards the postseason. If KC gets a gift from Cincinnati on Monday night and is able to lock up the 1 seed the following week, I’m not sure they can be stopped en route to Glendale.

4 – 49ers (11-4)

I honestly feel like I have the 49ers too low at 4. This could feasibly be the best team in the NFL. They, along with the three teams above them, are far and away the best teams in football. This team just keeps on looking better and better with every passing week. On Saturday, it was the offense that once again put together a masterful performance against a solid defense. The run game was a bit stagnant, but Brock Purdy was slinging the rock all over the yard for another huge day. George Kittle has found himself again and added a massively effective wrinkle to this already deadly offense that will only be scarier once Deebo Samuel returns. The defense didn’t have their best day, especially in the secondary, but the pass rush was still ferocious and allowed the Niners to separate themselves in the second half. This might be the scariest team in the league right now, and I can’t wait to see what they have left in store.

5 – Bills (12-3)

Buffalo got off to a very, very slow start on Saturday amidst the frigid temperatures in Chicago. It was not a promising sight. However, the second half was very promising as the offense was moving the ball very well on the ground and the defense made play after play. But I’m taking it with a grain of salt. They were playing a notoriously awful second half team in the Bears and they still couldn’t throw the ball effectively. Josh Allen had a 71.3 passer rating on 57% completion against a below average secondary. I just feel like I never know what Bills team is going to show up on any given Sunday. Will they be the offensive juggernauts with Allen launching deep balls and running over defenders? Will the offense be stuck in quicksand and limited through the air? Will the defense get gashed or be a brick wall? Monday night’s potential game of the year in Cincinnati will answer a lot of these questions as we head into the playoffs.

6 – Cowboys (11-4)

I give the Cowboys a ton of credit for keeping their composure after a nightmare start on Saturday to fight their way back in the game and win it late with some massive plays down the stretch. I was thoroughly impressed with their execution and resilience in the final stages of the game, including converting a miracle 3rd and 30 which helped keep them alive. Dak Prescott played a great game after throwing another bad pick six, CeeDee Lamb was unstoppable, and while the defense got gashed for the most part, they made the plays they had to when it mattered most. It was a very inspiring performance by a team that usually lacks in that department. That confidence can go a very long way as this team prepares for a very difficult playoff path.

7 – Chargers (9-6) 1

I hate saying this because I know it will come back to haunt me, but the Chargers are one of the spookiest teams in the league right now. Their offense is healthy and clicking, and their defense is playing lights out despite not being healthy. Now, Joey Bosa is on his way back for the playoffs. It’s pretty terrifying. Everyone thought the Chargers would be contenders before the season, then injuries put them in the dirt. But now that they’re getting healthy again, we’re seeing them live up to their potential. I assure you, nobody wants to see this team in the postseason. They’ll be a Wild Card team, but they can and will do damage.

8 – Vikings (12-3) 1

The 2022 Minnesota Vikings are the luckiest NFL team I have ever seen. The simple statistic of being 11-0 in one-score games is one of the most staggering figures in history. People keep talking about an inevitable regression to the mean with the Vikes, but we might just have to accept the fact that they’re a team of destiny. I feel bad, because it’s going to make their inevitable home playoff loss that much more painful for their tortured fanbase. I don’t take back what I’ve said about the Vikings being a legit team that should be respected, but I just find it impossible to believe that this level of luck and late-game heroism will continue once the playoffs roll around. But they are peak entertainment, so I would love to be proven wrong.

9 – Jaguars (7-8) 3

The Jacksonville Jaguars are a first place team with two weeks to play. What a time to be alive. Thursday night’s win was ugly and gross, but it was dominant more than anything else. I understand that it doesn’t take much of a defensive performance to dominate against Zach Wilson, but they locked up an effective offense while their own offense did its thing to come away with a win. The story of the Jags has been the same for the last month: they play inspired defense while Trevor Lawrence executes the offense to perfection. It’s hard to see that stopping as they move towards this division title.

10 – Dolphins (8-7) 1

It’s pretty hard to believe considering where this team stood a month ago, but the wheels have fallen off the Dolphins. I said that I didn’t think the 49ers exposed them a few weeks ago, but perhaps the blueprint was laid out on how to stop their explosive offense. NFL teams are now following that blueprint to a T, and it has made this offense much less effective than it was before. And the only person to blame for that is the QB, which I warned you all about. Tua has been figured out, and now that defenses are testing him, he is playing awfully. His performance on Sunday was his worst of the year, and none of his three consecutive 4th quarter interceptions were particularly close to anyone wearing a Dolphins uniform. Now that defenses are forcing Miami to win with Tua’s arm, they are no longer capable of winning. Once again, I foresaw this weeks ago, and we’re seeing the worst of it now. All of a sudden, this potential Super Bowl contender has been reduced to a team that has to fight to stay alive in the Wild Card race. At this point, who knows if they’re even capable of making the dance?

11 – Ravens (10-5) 4

Despite their horrendous opposition, the Ravens deserve some credit for staying afloat and keeping their division hopes alive in these last few weeks without Lamar Jackson. Now that he’ll likely be returning this week, they have a great shot to win the last two pivotal AFC North clashes to clinch the division. Even if he doesn’t play, we know they’ll be viable, especially at home against an average Steelers team this week. The defense remains the most impressive thing about this team, but I don’t know how to assess them when they play the likes of Cleveland and Atlanta and Pittsburgh and Denver. Week 18’s game in Cincinnati will tell us just who this team is as they head into the postseason.

12 – Lions (7-8) 2

That was extremely ugly. I said last week that the Lions’ struggles with defending the run could be the reason they lost on Saturday. I didn’t expect it to be that bad. This defense got flat out embarrassed by a team that simply out-coached, out-schemed, and outplayed them. The Panthers wanted it more and it showed. But it’s more than the fact that the defense got ripped to shreds. This offense played one of its worst games in the last several months. It’s hard to go on the road and beat a good defense, but at least we had seen the Lions do that from time to time. Saturday’s game brought out the worst in both sides of the ball when they could have seized a massive opportunity to get into the playoff picture. It’s a very steep uphill climb now.

13 – Jets (7-8) 2

Here’s the good news for the Jets: Zach Wilson has played his last snap in New York. He is absolutely cooked and will likely never be a starting QB ever again. This is also great news for NFL fans like myself who knew that he would never be anything short of awful in this league and both love being proven right and never having to see him play again. With Mike White returning this week, the Jets have a fighting shot to make the playoffs, but it’s going to be really hard. They don’t control their own destiny, and a lot of unlikely scenarios have to go their way. This team isn’t going to back down, but at the end of the day, I don’t think it’s going to be enough.

14 – Giants (8-6-1) 1

15 – Commanders (7-7-1) 1

Saturday’s loss in the Bay was both better and worse than I expected. On one hand, our defense was ripped apart by Brock Purdy and the secondary had one of its worst games of the year. On the other hand, Chase Young looked very good in his return, making the immediate impact that I knew he would. On yet another hand, the offense moved the ball pretty decently on a great defense highlighted by the continued tremendous play of Terry McLaurin and Jahan Dotson. And on one final hand, Taylor Heinicke pulled off his usual shenanigans to singlehandedly lose us the game, featuring awful throws and negative pocket presence en route to being benched for Carson Wentz, making this whole season come full circle. I don’t know what to expect moving forward, but I have a feeling that Wentz will be under center in the final two games. It just feels like he gives us a better shot to win at this point. I’m not complaining; I’ve been waiting for Heinicke’s demise for over a year now. I’m just glad it’s finally here.

16 – Panthers (6-9) 8

This team is winning the NFC South. I’ve seen enough. They are playing such inspired football right now, and I think they’re going to beat the lifeless Bucs this week. They run the ball so well, only relying on Sam Darnold to make a few key throws in a game, and let their defense do the rest. It’s the perfect formula for a team with this makeup from top to bottom. I love the way they play and I love watching them play, and I genuinely can’t wait to see them in the playoffs.

17 – Packers (7-8) 3

I guess they’re actually back. The Packers have won three in a row and now sit in a golden position to sneak their way into the playoffs. Despite that, I think the media needs to calm down when it comes to decreeing this team as anything greater than average. They haven’t beaten the toughest teams in this win streak, and there are still a plethora of flaws with the roster. The run game is a struggle bus and the injury to Christian Watson isn’t exactly inspiring. Aaron Rodgers is playing pretty well, but those performances have come against JV defenses. Even if they sneak into the dance, they’re going to get smacked by San Francisco yet again. It’ll be a very rude awakening. But it’s a nice story that the media will milk for weeks because this is the Green Bay Packers.

18 – Steelers (7-8) 5

I never say this, but I’m really happy for the Steelers. Saturday night’s win was such an inspiring, awesome sight, and I was elated when they won the game in the final seconds. I know Franco was too. Pittsburgh is playing some very solid football as of late, and perhaps we shouldn’t sleep on them as a potential Wild Card team. The defense can win any game for them despite the continued struggles of the offense. The last two games are difficult, physical divisional games, but I think that plays right into this team’s strengths. I wouldn’t be surprised if they won both.

19 – Raiders (6-9) 3

In the last three weeks, the Raiders have lost two games they simply had no business losing. The Thursday night debacle against Baker Mayfield and the Rams was embarrassing, and this Saturday night’s offensive dud was perhaps the worst of the season. Josh Jacobs couldn’t get a damn thing going, and Davante Adams was limited to two catches for fifteen yards. 2 for 15. This is one of the best players in the NFL we’re talking about! The offensive shortcomings have been the Raiders’ undoing all year long, and it has officially buried them. It’s a shame for a team that’s so talented. But I shouldn’t expect anything different from this franchise.

20 – Buccaneers (7-8) 2

The Buccaneers beat an awful team starting a 3rd string QB in overtime on Sunday night. And this is supposed to move the needle? Not to me. With every passing week, I feel worse and worse about the Bucs, and I am now extremely confident that the Panthers will beat them this week and jump them to make the postseason. This team really has no life and no heart. They are immensely boring and flat for sixty minutes every single week. They rely on a few key plays by their defense and Tom Brady to escape with close win after close win. It’s not a winning formula and it won’t fly against teams that are better than the likes of Arizona and New Orleans. You’ll all see in a week’s time.

21 – Seahawks (7-8) 4

We can officially stick a fork in the 2022 Seahawks. While I’d usually be very happy about this, I actually feel for Geno Smith and the guys. This was a super fun team for most of the season that has simply lost itself and fallen apart on both sides of the ball down the stretch. There’s not much more that needs to be said. I have no doubt that the young core of this team will keep them competitive in the years to come, but all eyes now turn to this offseason, which should be very interesting to monitor.

22 – Patriots (7-8) 1

The Patriots were invisible on both sides of the ball in the first half on Saturday and used a few ridiculous plays to get back in the game in the second half, then literally handed the game away when they could have won it. If that’s not a microcosm of this season in New England, I don’t know what is. This team is essentially dead and buried, and I’d be shocked if they put together a run to the postseason. The defense is still solid, but the offense is anything but, and Mac Jones has quickly become a very bad QB who only excels at making dirty plays. For that reason alone, I’m praying on this team’s downfall.

23 – Titans (7-8) 5

Unfortunately for the Titans, the season has come full circle. After Week 2, I decreed that this team was cooked and that it was time to blow it up and start over. They played very well over the next two months, but they have now lost a whopping five games in a row to lose their grip on the division and slip out of the playoff race. It was over, then they were back, and now it’s very much over. It’s hard to win with a project backup QB in Malik Willis, but they were falling apart even before Ryan Tannehill’s injury. Both sides of the ball are just boring and ineffective outside of a few stars like Derrick Henry and Jeffery Simmons. They’re essentially just the Buccaneers of the AFC. Like Tampa, this team is crashing out of the playoffs while the young, fun, jungle cat team wins the division.

24 – Saints (6-9) 3

For the Saints to go up north to sub-zero Cleveland and win a game with their physicality and execution on both sides of the ball says a lot about the fight of this team. They’re not good and they were in a less than desirable situation, but they played tough, physical football against a solid team on the road. Good for them. They could’ve used some performances like that if they wanted to somehow win this division, but I suppose it’s better late than never.

25 – Browns (6-9) 6

Man, this team is embarrassing. To lose like that at home against a team with virtually no life is just sad. The Browns’ lackluster offense played perhaps their worst game yet, Deshaun Watson was nothing short of dreadful, and while the defense did its thing, it didn’t matter. They gave up more points than they were allowed to with the offense being as awful as it is. It’s a sad situation, but I think everyone outside of Cleveland is pretty happy with this. You reap what you sow.

26 – Rams (5-10) 4

Good for the Rams to get another feel-good win at home. Baker Mayfield played some shockingly great football and the defense absolutely bullied the anemic Broncos from start to finish. It was perhaps the most inspired performance by this team all year long. Like I said after their comeback two weeks ago, they should feel good about themselves for now. Because the second you take a look into the future of this team, it gets pretty grim.

27 – Falcons (5-10) 2

I don’t want to talk about this team. Like, ever. They don’t deserve it. There’s simply nothing to talk about. They are boring and lifeless and simply putrid.

28 – Cardinals (4-11)

The Cards put up a solid fight on Christmas night against Tom Brady and the Bucs, and perhaps they could’ve won if they were just a little bit better. But at the end of the day, a loss benefits this team much more than a win does. As I’ve been saying for weeks, this team is headed towards cleaning house and starting over, and losses like this help move towards a more fruitful rebuild.

29 – Colts (4-10-1)

I thought the Colts would be competitive on Monday night. I was wrong. Nick Foles was awful as the starting QB, and while the defense had some nice moments, it simply wasn’t enough in the end. The offense is just shambolic no matter who starts at QB. I have no idea what the future of this franchise is going to look like, but they need to pour all of their resources into finding the right coach and QB as they head into 2023.

30 – Broncos (4-11) 4

Sunday’s loss was one of the most embarrassing things I’ve ever seen. Nathaniel Hackett’s shortlived 16-week tenure in Denver was one of the most embarrassing things I’ve ever seen. Russell Wilson is one of the most embarrassing things I’ve ever seen. This has been one of the most disastrous seasons I can remember for a team. And I am still loving every damn second of it.

31 – Texans (2-12-1) 1

Good for the Texans to get that elusive second win of the season. They deserve it after the way they’ve played in the last few weeks. They kept on fighting and fighting and it finally paid off with a very solid road win against a tough divisional opponent. And they didn’t directly jeopardize the #1 pick in the process! This might’ve been the best week for this team in the last three years!

32 – Bears (3-12) 1

I truly believe this is the worst team in the league. They simply don’t have the fight that Houston does, although they just so happen to have a better record. But that came from meaningless close wins in the beginning of the year. Now, this team is just lifeless and an eye sore. The offensive injuries have this team playing guys off the street and it shows in a massive way. It is no secret that the Bears have plenty of nice pieces and are in a great spot moving forward, but this has to be as bad as it gets for any team that’s in a rebuild.

All stats taken from ESPN.

Post-Week 15 Power Rankings

One of the most fun, action-packed weeks in recent memory has caused a ton of shuffling in the Rankings as the regular season continues winding down and the playoff picture starts to take shape.

Cover photo taken from The San Diego Union-Tribune.

1 – Eagles (13-1)

Sunday’s win in Chicago wasn’t nearly as clean as the Eagles would have liked. Jalen Hurts threw two picks, but it never held the offense back, and they still controlled the game for the most part. They ran the ball effectively and their defense made all the plays when they were called upon. Hurts still ended the game with a great statline especially by pounding the ball on the ground, but that cost him and the team as he now has a sprained shoulder and might miss this week’s pivotal divisional clash in Dallas. I hope Hurts can go, but if it’s Gardner Minshew under center, I still feel like the Birds have a good shot with their run game and defense. With the 1 seed on the line, I feel like they’ll step up and get it done.

2 – Bengals (10-4)

Sunday’s comeback win in Tampa emphasized everything I love about the Bengals. They were definitely struggling in the first half, getting stifled offensively and looking lost on defense. But they turned it up in the second half, forcing turnover after turnover and gifting Joe Burrow a bunch of short fields which were easily converted into points to eventually win by double digits after going down 17-0. Burrow was masterful with the ball in his hands outside of a tipped INT, and the offense was firing on all cylinders with four different touchdown scorers. The defense lost Sam Hubbard who could miss the rest of the regular season with a calf issue, which could prove to be extremely detrimental, but the rest of the unit stepped up on Sunday, so perhaps they have it in them to keep it going against some stiff competition as the season winds down.

3 – Chiefs (11-3)

The Chiefs are the latest team to learn to not overlook the Houston Texans. They did not play their sharpest ball across the board, which could be seen as a cause for concern. But I am never concerned with this team as long as they have Patrick Mahomes. He was marvelous once again, boasting the highest completion percentage in a game with 40+ attempts in history to go along with 3 total touchdowns to carry his team to victory. The overtime win clinched the AFC West for KC, but it may have also clinched Mahomes the MVP. I still have a lot of reservations about this defense, especially in the secondary, but they have a few weeks to get it figured out before the postseason.

4 – 49ers (10-4)

The Brock Purdy show keeps on keeping on in the Bay. The rookie keeps on playing some very good ball, and while the 49ers aren’t necessarily winning because of him, he’s definitely a reason why. The offense hasn’t lost a step (in fact, they might be even better), and the defense continues playing at a level that I have rarely seen. If that unit can carry this team to a potential title, they might go down in history as one of the best we’ve ever witnessed. The Niners close out the year with a couple tough matchups, but I simply don’t see them losing any more games with the way they’re clicking across the board. They have no reason to.

5 – Bills (11-3) 1

The Bills are playing some of their best ball as of late, and they’re finally starting to assert themselves as one of the elite contenders in the league. While I don’t think Saturday’s win was one of their best, I really like the way they won. They faced adversity, didn’t back down, made plays on both sides of the ball, and pulled it out late. Josh Allen keeps on carrying this team on his back, and while I still don’t know how long he can keep it up for, it just keeps working. The defense is playing much better than I’ve expected, and it’s paying dividends. The return of Tre White to the secondary has proven to be massive. Buffalo still controls their own destiny in the pursuit of the 1 seed, and while the Bengals might play spoiler in two weeks, these guys have everything they need to get the job done.

6 – Cowboys (10-4) 1

Last week, I said that the Cowboys’ struggles likely weren’t a sign of things to come. I might have been wrong. Dallas got extremely unlucky on Sunday en route to a loss, but they have themselves to blame for a lot of their issues. There’s no excuse to blow a 17-point second half lead. This defense is far too good to allow over 500 yards of offense to any team. Dak Prescott has played well for the most part, and the game-losing pick six was not his fault, but he hasn’t elevated the offense to where they need to be. When the run game struggles like it did on Sunday, the offense lacks that next level to put them over the top. They’re bound to play some great defenses in the playoffs, so I certainly have my reservations about where this team is headed.

7 – Vikings (11-3) 1

Major props to the Vikings for making history with their record-setting 33-point comeback win on Saturday. It was awesome to watch unfold. It really epitomized what this team has been all year long. They have the exact opposite luck of the Vikings teams of old, as I’ve been saying for months. That has propelled them to this record and this division title. A lot of people would give them flak for getting down 33-0 in the first place, but it was a disastrous first half with defensive and special teams touchdowns allowed amidst turnovers and complete chaos. When the gameplan called for the Vikes offense to be at their best, they completely turned it up and showed us what they’re capable of. I understand the narrative that this team isn’t all that and won’t be a threat in the playoffs, but perhaps they’re not quite yet out of miracles.

8 – Chargers (8-6) 1

No one is benefitting more from the AFC Wild Card race falling apart than the Chargers, who continue to rise to the occasion and now sit as the 6 seed. Since their offense has gotten fully healthy, they’ve played some of their best ball of the year, and with Joey Bosa returning to the defense soon, LA is a team that nobody is going to want to face in the playoffs. Justin Herbert is simply playing lights out, and the shorthanded defense is playing much better than anticipated. The remaining schedule is a relative cakewalk, so a playoff berth is imminent. It’s just a matter of where the Chargers sit as we head into the postseason.

9 – Dolphins (8-6) 2

The Dolphins have gotten some tough breaks over the last few weeks, but that’s the nature of this league. You have to win close games, and Miami hasn’t done that. They’ve lost three in a row against three teams in this top 8, which would happen to most teams in the league, and they simply haven’t looked as good as they did earlier in the year. I loved the fight they put up in the frigid conditions on Saturday, but this is a team that needs to win games like that to inspire confidence in them. When they lose, it really hurts that confidence level. Their final three games are going to be tough, so while the Dolphins are almost certainly going to make the playoffs, it might be a rougher road than they could have traveled to get there.

10 – Lions (7-7) 2

Look at the Lions man. So inspirational. This team keeps on winning in a plethora of ways to miraculously find their way back at .500 and in the top 10 for the first time ever. On Sunday, it was the late game execution of their offense and their overall defensive performance that got the job done. They were definitely susceptible to a few huge plays by the Jets offense, but they never broke despite being bent, and they made every play they had to in the end to pull out the win. This team just plays inspiring football and I can’t wait to see them continue this playoff push. I hope they get in over the likes of some other NFC Wild Card teams that I won’t mention.

11 – Jets (7-7)

I feel bad for the Jets. I really do. Being in a perfect spot to make a playoff push just to have to revert back to starting Zach Wilson is brutal. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemies. They’re now spiraling out of the playoffs and on the outside looking in, and their final three games are certainly going to be lost if Wilson remains the starter. Even with the defense playing how it is and the skill position players on offense doing their thing, nothing will be accomplished with the worst QB in the league under center.

12 – Jaguars (6-8) 7

The Jaguars are developing into one of the best stories of the back half of the season. They’ve won back to back massive games and now control their own destiny to win the division and make the playoffs. It’s truly a great story for such a fun, energetic, and genuinely good young team. The receiving corps is finally putting up numbers, the run game is solid, and the defense is a ton of fun. But the story here is obviously Trevor Lawrence, who has been one of the best QBs in the league this year. It took him a year outside of the dysfunction of 2021 to develop into the star we all knew he could be, and now that he’s playing at such a high level, the Jags are a force. I know he has what it takes to carry this team to wins, and perhaps a division title in a few weeks. I can’t wait to see what else this team has in store.

13 – Giants (8-5-1) 4

With no due respect, I refuse to talk about this fraudulent, disgusting, and corrupt team for the rest of the season. I will simply place them in the Power Rankings and pick their games with no explanation or further commentary from here on out.

14 – Commanders (7-6-1) 4

It was supposed to be different this time. It wasn’t. They were supposed to change the narrative. They didn’t. I don’t know why I ever got my hopes up. It’s utterly embarrassing to go out there and put up that performance at home in primetime in front of one of the best crowds we’ve had in years after two weeks prep against the same team you just played to separate yourself in the Wild Card race. I understand that the officiating is grabbing all the headlines; it was completely inexcusable and those officials need to be held accountable. But the real story of the loss is the fact that this is the same old team that cannot win the big game. They can’t even get prepared for it. Taylor Heinicke is an absolute bum and a complete joke of a player and I cannot wait for the day he no longer plays for this team. The playcalling is just abhorrent. Brian Robinson just gets ignored for no reason. The defense once again could not stop Daniel Jones. It’s just a sad joke. It was one of the most devastating losses I’ve ever seen, and it’s going to be a while before I recover from it considering it practically ended our season. I wouldn’t be surprised if we lost out.

15 – Ravens (9-5) 2

Thank goodness the Ravens finally lost. I’ve been waiting for this for way too long now. Thank you for opening the door for the Bengals to take this division. The NFL and its fans thank the Browns for their services. This team is so boring and so incompetent offensively that I don’t even want to see them in a playoff game. The defense is still fine, but no one wants to see this 1950s offense in January. Maybe things will change with Lamar gets back, but I seriously doubt it.

16 – Raiders (6-8) 2

The never-ending roller coaster that is the Raiders franchise just went for some more drops and loops on Sunday evening. This team almost certainly did not deserve to win that game, being gifted a touchdown to tie the game when Keelan Cole was clearly out of bounds, then being gifted the most ridiculous touchdown at the end of the game to win it. But I won’t rain on the parade. It was hilarious and one of the best game-winning plays I’ve ever seen. It was the type of finish that the Raiders needed if they want to find it in them to make a push for the postseason at this point. They should be .500 or better by all means, and if they play their best ball down the stretch, they might just sneak in. The problem is that their last two games (vs. SF and KC) are as brutal as it gets.

17 – Seahawks (7-7) 2

The wheels are officially falling off the Seahawks. It’s kind of sad to watch happen in real time. They just don’t play with the same juice they did in the first half of the season. Geno Smith is losing his precise touch, the defense is becoming very susceptible to big plays, and the run game is disappearing. They’re playing the exact opposite brand of football of the one they excelled at just a few weeks ago. It’s now an uphill climb for Seattle to get back in the playoff picture, and at this point, I just don’t see it happening.

18 – Titans (7-7) 1

Speaking of the wheels falling off teams, the Titans look like Lightning McQueen on the last lap of the Piston Cup right now. There are no more wheels. It’s simply over. I have no more faith in the Titans to accomplish anything, and I’m fully committed to the idea that the Jaguars are going to run the table and steal this division from underneath them. I recognize that the defense had themselves a heck of a game on Sunday, but nothing else on this team is working. I have faith in their coaching to steer them in the right direction, but it is simply too late for that.

19 – Browns (6-8) 1

The Browns are one of my BFFs this week for beating the Ravens, even though it wasn’t exactly the most convincing win in the world. It was ugly, sloppy, and old-school AFC North football that got the job done. They still don’t look great offensively with Deshaun Watson, but the defense is balling, and I still feel like it won’t be long before the other side of the ball figures it out. It’s too late for this team to make a playoff push, but I have to think they can carry some of this momentum into next season.

20 – Packers (6-8) 1

I’ve seen a lot of commotion about the Packers making a potential playoff push. Let’s stop that right now please. They’ve had a few nice games here and there, but anyone can look good against the Rams and Bears. This team still doesn’t have what they once did on either side of the ball, and it wouldn’t shock me in the slightest if they don’t win another game this season. It is nice to see them play well; good football at Lambeau at this stage in the year is simply football heritage. But this isn’t a playoff team. Be real with yourselves.

21 – Patriots (7-7) 7

I really just don’t know what to say. I’ve seen an infinite amount of awful plays at every level of football. I’ve seen some ridiculous ways to lose games. That might have been the worst one in the history of the sport. But this is more than the way the Patriots lost on Sunday. It’s the fact that the loss took them out of a playoff spot and likely ended their season. The fact that it may be the reason the team cleans house next year. It’s a season-defining low for a franchise that has never stooped to this point in this century. It feels like a fever dream. And it’s absolutely hilarious.

22 – Buccaneers (6-8)

Sunday’s game was a microcosm of this entire season for Tampa Bay. In the first half, the offense was absolutely clicking and the defense was suffocating. In the second half, the offense could not hold onto the football and the defense couldn’t stop a nosebleed (albeit in their own half over and over again). From up 17-0 to down 34-17. It epitomized the 2022 Buccaneers. Somehow this team still leads the pitiful NFC South, but who knows what could happen in the next three weeks. Perhaps this is still a team that no one wants to see in the playoffs. But I’m just not scared by these guys anymore. There is nothing to be afraid of.

23 – Steelers (6-8) 1

Remind me to never bet a Steelers game ever again. I just can’t a read on these guys. I never have any idea what to make of them. Their defense played very well on Sunday, but it comes one week after being gashed by the Ravens. Their offense had a solid showing as well, which comes after a season’s worth of awful performances. They are consistently inconsistent, and it puts them in no man’s land in my brain. But they deserve this spot considering the teams that are below them.

24 – Panthers (5-9) 1

In a completely shocking turn of events, Sam Darnold sucks at football. Who would have thought? Why would I ever bet on that guy? Despite their pitiful QB play and their nonexistent run game, the Panthers somehow sit a game out of first place in this God awful division. I don’t like their chances with a guy like Darnold under center, but anything can happen in this league. Against all odds, they still control their own destiny. If they make something happen, I’ll be shocked.

25 – Falcons (5-9)

Desmond Ridder lost his first start with Atlanta in essentially the exact way I expected him to. There’s not much else to it. The Falcons aren’t showing me anything to like, but like all the other teams in this division, they can still somehow win it. It’s truly embarrassing to see the NFC South in a spot like this, but at least it gives me a reason to be invested in these games as the season winds down. I think this team probably has the worst chance of any to sneak up and win the division, but like I said with Carolina, anything can happen in this league.

26 – Broncos (4-10) 4

Does anyone think it’s a stretch to say the Broncos are better with Brett Rypien than they are with Russell Wilson? Or was Sunday’s great win a product of playing the Cardinals? Either way, Denver should feel good about themselves with this win. It was nice to see Mile High so alive after a year’s worth of struggles. I honestly don’t see a reason to play Russ again this season, but maybe that’s wishful thinking and me wanting to be averted of seeing his awful play again.

27 – Saints (5-9) 4

Are the Saints back? No. Probably not. But Sunday’s win was a nice one that was fairly obvious to predict. They didn’t look great offensively, but they were good enough on a select few plays to put them over the top while the defense held it down for the rest of the game. This team is somehow one game behind in the division, but it’s hard to see them making any sort of “run” for the title with their remaining schedule. But as I said above, at least it gives me a reason to care about their final few games.

28 – Cardinals (4-10) 2

QB injuries continue to plague the Cardinals as backup Colt McCoy got hurt on Sunday, leaving Trace McSorley as the guy moving forward in Arizona. What a disaster. The kid from Briarwoods was about as bad as you’d expect in relief of McCoy, throwing no dimes whatsoever, unless they were to the Broncos defensive backs. You’d think having DeAndre Hopkins and Hollywood Brown to throw to would help a backup QB, but it simply doesn’t. Things have gone from bad to worse to simply atrocious in the desert, but at least this team has a future to look forward to once they clean house this offseason and move forward with some sense of direction.

29 – Colts (4-9-1) 2

New rule: if you go up 33-0 in the first half just to blow the biggest lead in the history of the league in the second half and overtime, I’m not talking about you for that week.

30 – Rams (4-10) 2

I tried to tell you guys about Baker. The media was so happy that their beloved QB pulled off an incredible win two weeks ago to get another starting job. He had you all fooled. Anyone with a semblance of knowledge about this game knows how awful he is, and it was on full display in an absolutely shambolic performance on Monday night in Lambeau. Is Bryce Perkins really that worse of an option? It’s honestly crazy to me. I really hope this team doesn’t subject us to watching more of this guy play QB this season. If they do, I certainly will be spending my Christmas elsewhere.

31 – Bears (3-11) 2

I’m a broken record when it comes to the Bears at this point, but they keep on doing exactly what they need to do. Justin Fields continues to cook while they continue to cook and inch closer to a top 2 pick. It’s really a beautiful sight.

32 – Texans (1-12-1)

Like I said last week, the Texans are back to being the frisky team they were in the first half of the season, pushing great teams like Dallas and Kansas City to the brink. That’s a solid sign for the worst team in the NFL, and it’s definitely a good thing that they continue to lose these games. They’re essentially locked in for a top 2 pick, so a franchise QB is heading to H-Town. We can only hope that they don’t mess it up.

All stats taken from ESPN.