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Cover photo taken from Imagn Images.

1 – Bills (3-0) 1

While it doesn’t necessarily feel like one team is standing above the rest right now, it’s hard to put anyone over Buffalo. They sat here after Week 1, their offense has been fantastic, sitting first in EPA/play, , and they’re going to keep sleepwalking to victories for as long as their cupcakes remain cupcakes.

A team like the Chargers — or even the Eagles for that matter — might have a more impressive set of three wins, but I still think the Bills are the best of the bunch.

2 – Chargers (3-0) 2

To start a season 3-0 with wins against each opponent in your division is pretty impressive. The latest act being a comeback effort against a very good Broncos defense, highlighted by more heroics from your elite quarterback, is also pretty great.

If the season ended right now, I’d either give my MVP vote to Justin Herbert or Baker Mayfield. But, we’ve got 15 weeks left. Still, what No. 10 in the powder blue is doing on a weekly basis is awesome. Not to mention, their defense ranks 4th in EPA/play and hasn’t given up more than 21 points this season.

The injury to Najee Harris stings, but if they can truly unlock Omarion Hampton, this team is going to assert themselves as the frontrunner in the AFC West, if they haven’t done so already.

3 – Packers (2-1) 2

Losses happen. It’s the NFL. Anyone can beat anyone on any given Sunday.

But, you’ve heard me say it: there are good and bad ways to lose.

The Packers can hang their hats on their defense continuing to be stellar. But poor offense and special teams will drag anyone down. The run game has been so-so, the offensive line is falling apart at the seams and poorly timed turnovers and field goal operational errors puts any defense in a bind.

No one thinks that Cleveland is better than Green Bay. But I also don’t think anyone disputes that the Browns deserved to win down the stretch considering how the Packers handed them the game. It’s a slice of humble pie; perhaps it’s a needed one. But I doubt it’ll become a trend.

4 – Lions (2-1) 3

Any rumors of the Lions’ demise were greatly exaggerated. This team still has the goods.

Monday night’s victory was a patented Detroit win under Dan Campbell. They were aggressive on fourth down, but not reckless, utilizing elite playcalls and better execution to turn each of them into touchdowns. They dominated both lines of scrimmage in a breakout game for their defensive front with seven sacks while the OL paved the way for over 200 rushing yards. It was pretty damn close to perfect.

It was as impressive of a performance as any team has had this season, and I don’t have many, if any, doubts about their ability to keep it up.

5 – Eagles (3-0)

Oh look, they got away with it again.

I will begrudgingly give the Birds credit — they picked themselves off the mat and completely flipped the script on the Rams on both sides of the ball in the second half. After the worst first 30 minutes imaginable, they were damn near unstoppable down the stretch thanks to finally letting Jalen Hurts rip it to AJ Brown. It certainly helps when Emmanuel Forbes is covering him — a situation where multiple games of tape would suggest utilizing a different strategy — but alas. And blocking two field goals down the stretch can be blamed on the kicking operation, but the defensive side deserves credit as well.

I still don’t think this is the same caliber of team that we saw last year. But again, they’re going to keep winning games. That’s the sign of a good team.

6 – Buccaneers (3-0) 2

Speaking of potentially unsustainable 3-0 starts… the Bucs did it again as well! This one also featured block field goal shenanigans, but like the first two weeks, ended with Baker Mayfield putting on the cape and leading his team down for the win in the waning moments.

Considering the laundry list of injuries across the board for Tampa, I don’t know how long they can keep this up. But the fact of the matter is that Mayfield, Bucky Irving, Emeka Egbuka, Vita Vea, Antoine Winfield and others are making every single play to put them over the top in these games.

Sunday’s contest should never have ended the way it did. The Buccaneers were really in control for 58 minutes. For it to have fallen apart with them still pulling out the win speaks for itself.

7 – Rams (2-1) 1

Most brutal choke of the young NFL season? Folks are asking.

The Rams were making the Eagles look pedestrian for two quarters and change. Then they forgot how to play football. There’s so many people that I could blame, but I’m putting this one on Sean McVay. It’s not because of the failures of the kicking operation, though the line share of blame could go there. It’s because he coached scared, and that led to being outcoached by Nick Sirianni of all people.

Each time LA faced a fourth down deep in Philly territory, they opted for field goals. That’s fine and dandy until the team you’ve seemingly buried decides to pull an Undertaker. At that point, you need to assert yourselves and put the ball in the endzone, not through the uprights. I don’t care that if either of the blocked field goals went in, the Rams would have won. It’s about the process, not the results.

I’d like to think McVay would trust Matt Stafford to convert a couple of fourth-and-shorts. I don’t know why he didn’t. And it’s led to another loss against the Eagles where the Rams only have themselves to blame.

8 – Colts (3-0) 1

Sorry for doubting you again, Colts. I think I’ve learned my lesson.

This offense is nothing short of awesome and Shane Steichen is shining in the spotlight. A reliance on motion and play action has led to this being one of the best units in football, led by the resurgent Daniel Jones and Jonathan Taylor, who each have arguments for currently being the best players at their position in the league. The secondary continues to cook, though they haven’t faced the greatest slate of QBs thus far. And all of a sudden, they are the clear cut favorites in the AFC South, banking plenty of wins and separating themselves early.

Let’s put it this way: if the Colts go .500 the rest of the way, they’ll be 10-7. That’s a playoff team no matter how you slice it. And at this rate, 10 wins could be their floor.

9 – Ravens (1-2) 6

One day the Ravens will win a game of consequence. Today is not that day.

I don’t know why this team refuses to make the requisite plays to win games against true contenders. But they don’t. They do the opposite, which is pretty much nothing at all. As awesome as they can be for three quarters and change, they’re always going to find a way to blow it down the stretch. It’s mind-numbing.

Lamar Jackson is amazing. Derrick Henry needs to fix the fumbling issues. Those are the clear observations on the surface. But if you break out the magnifying glass, there’s a lot more to digest. The defense is a real issue. So is the coaching. That will hold them back in these big regular season games. And you already know it will in January, too. We’re slowly crawling towards the inevitable.

10 – Commanders (2-1) 3

Wait, that went way better than I expected. Phew!

Sunday wasn’t perfect, but considering the circumstances, it was pretty close. Marcus Mariota did what he does in a Washington uniform. Special teams was gas outside of a missed field goal (Matt Gay continues to be under surveillance, by the way). The defensive line kept on cooking against a simply overmatched Raiders OL. And our own hog mollies paved the way for an elite day on the ground. Even Luke freaking McCaffrey found the endzone!

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. We have no clarity on the Jayden Daniels injury, and now Terry McLaurin is dealing with a quad issue. Will Harris is going to miss extended time with a fractured fibula, too. But, this is still the “easy” part of the schedule. Let’s keep getting right and stacking wins.

11 – Chiefs (1-2) 1

Oh look, a win. That’s neat.

At least it was decisive. I know we all thought it’d be close, and maybe it would have been if Russell Wilson was worth a damn. But if the Chiefs can play like they did in the second half consistently while they crawl towards being full strength on offense, it inspires some confidence moving forward.

12 – Broncos (1-2) 1

You’re only as strong as your weakest link. Right now, Bo Nix is a very, very weak link.

He’s PFF’s worst-graded quarterback. He can’t hit the broad side of a barn on a deep shot. And he’s frantic in the pocket. If he was even just a smidge better, the Broncos would be 3-0. But they are not.

I love this defense. I love the offensive line. The weapons are punching above their weight. And they’re all being let down by the QB that is having the sophomore slump that no one is talking about.

13 – 49ers (3-0) 1

If the season ended today, Kyle Shanahan would win Coach of the Year.

Getting this team to 3-0 with the litany of injuries they have sustained — and continue to deal with, with Nick Bosa’s ACL tear being the latest — is extremely impressive. Mac Jones has been valiant in relief of Brock Purdy, who should return this week. And the young defense is starting to come into its own.

Also, shoutout to Ricky Pearsall. There isn’t a better breakout and a more improved player year-over-year than him right now outside of maybe Daniel Jones.

14 – Vikings (2-1) 1

Sunday’s destruction of the Bengals reinforced key points on both sides of the ball in Minnesota: Kevin O’Connell is a genius and Brian Flores is a maniac.

Carson Wentz did what he had to do in relief of JJ McCarthy because — as we’ve said time and time again — pretty much anyone can get it done in that offense. And Flores’ scheme continues to terrorize opposing quarterbacks of any and all caliber, wreaking havoc and leaving everyone in shambles. This defense is now first in EPA/play, which is heavily influenced by Sunday’s two touchdowns from Isaiah Rodgers, but they deserve it with what they’ve done to these poor QBs.

15 – Seahawks (2-1) 6

I think we should be talking more about the Seahawks. I get that beating two bad defenses in Pittsburgh and New Orleans might not get the people going, but this team has been nails on offense this season.

Sam Darnold has been one of the most efficient QBs in the league, Jaxon Smith-Njigba has been completely unguardable, Kenneth Walker is running like a man possessed and the defense is simply punching above its weight. Even with so many injuries on that side of the ball, they’re finding ways to create turnovers. And they are absolutely dominant up front. When guys like Nick Emmanwori and Devon Witherspoon come back, it could get spooky.

16 – Steelers (2-1) 6

God, this team is boring.

The Steelers are lucky to be 2-1. They had to escape the Jets in Week 1, and the Patriots practically placed Sunday’s win on a black and gold platter. This defense is not good and the offense is uninspiring. The lack of a run game puts a lot of the load on Aaron Rodgers, who hasn’t been bad by any means. But it’s not a great winning formula, and it sure as hell ain’t sustainable.

I honestly feel worse about this team through three games than I thought I would.

17 – Falcons (1-2) 7

Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

I don’t even want to talk about the Falcons. They don’t deserve it. Not after that performance after that credit I gave them. What an unmitigated disaster from Raheem Morris and Michael Penix Jr.

We’ll see if the shakeups in the coaching ranks makes any kind of impact, because right now, it’s not looking good. At all.

18 – Cardinals (2-1) 1

This is a solid team. But no one really cares, because they’re not giving us a reason to.

Kyler Murray isn’t the problem. Marvin Harrison Jr. and the rest of the WRs not being able to catch the football are. James Conner’s season-ending injury is. Untimely mistakes are.

I think the Cardinals will continue to be competitive. Losing Conner hurts bad, but the way they’re playing on defense will keep them in any and every game. Will their offense be good enough to turn that into wins? I just don’t know.

19 – Jaguars (2-1) 5

Sure, what the hell. The Jags won a game that no one wanted to win, and they did it in a fashion that’s neither convincing nor worth caring about.

I still like this offensive personnel, and for what it’s worth, their defense has been both solid and opportunistic with seven picks on the year and somehow ranking second in defensive EPA/play. But I still don’t believe in Trevor Lawrence, and I still don’t think this offense is good enough to beat teams that are competent on both sides of the ball.

20 – Texans (0-3) 2

Is it over? It very well may be.

I can’t keep defending CJ Stroud. He’s uncomfortable, but he’s also not confident and his mechanics are in the gutter. He has no faith in his OL, no faith in his weapons and quite frankly, no faith in himself. And that means this already anemic offense can’t produce anything worth a damn.

It doesn’t matter how good this defense is. The Texans have scored 38 points in 2025. The Seahawks did that in less than two quarters on Sunday. At 0-3 staring up at the 3-0 Colts, Houston will have to scrap to not have a fork stuck in them before the clocks fall back an hour.

21 – Bears (1-2) 6

You know what? Good for Caleb Williams and Ben Johnson.

Sunday’s performance looked like what everyone would have you believe every game should be under the new regime in Chicago. But, they won’t be playing a borderline-CFL defense every week. So, let’s see if this injects the Bears with life or is simply a flash in the pan.

22 – Cowboys (1-2) 6

Yeah, this team ain’t worth talking about right now. The state of their defense is Chernobyl-like, and now they’ll be without CeeDee Lamb for a month or so. It’s going to get ugly in Dallas — or, as Stephen A. Smith aptly named them, “-allas.”

23 – Patriots (1-2) 6

Why is this Mike Vrabel team so poorly coached? Is it youth and inexperience? Is it systemic? Whatever it is, it needs to change.

Drake Maye is playing well, but not well enough to cover up the vast amount of penalties and mistakes that continues to hold this team back from being productive on offense.

And don’t even get me started on their run game — or lack thereof — and refusal to get TreVeyon Henderson involved. Complete and utter nonsense.

24 – Bengals (2-1) 4

Yeah, Jake Browning ain’t it. We might’ve already known that, but Sunday confirmed it.

I don’t know that the Bengals necessarily need to bring in a veteran QB, because I think riding it out with the guy that knows the system is a better play. But I don’t think this is going to be a super successful operation with Browning back there. But, they also won’t be facing a Brian Flores defense every week. Take it with a very small grain of salt.

25 – Raiders (1-2) 2

This team is a mess on a number of fronts, but I think you have to start with the offensive line when pointing out the issues. Ashton Jeanty has negative yards before contact this season. That’s unfathomable.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like the passing game is much better. The line isn’t helping out Geno, but Geno isn’t helping out Geno either. And the downfield threats just aren’t there with Brock Bowers dealing with his injuries. The defense is clearly also an issue with the performances against the run in the first two weeks clearly being a fugazi.

It’s just not a tight operation in Vegas right now. Maybe Tom Brady can impart some wisdom next time he sits up in the booth with a headset on.

26 – Giants (0-3) 1

Thank you, Brian Daboll, for finally doing right by your players and naming Jaxson Dart the starter. Playing Russell Wilson was a complete disservice to everyone involved with the Giants, and Sunday night proved it.

Is it going to look much better with Dart? Who knows; this is a pretty brutal operation all round. But at least he provides some hope and won’t turtle the way Wilson has. I’m excited to see it play out for him.

27 – Browns (1-2) 4

What a cool win for the Browns. This defense is simply awesome with the rookies balling out and the offense is clearly lifted by the insertion of Quinshon Judkins in the lineup.

In my opinion, Myles Garrett has been the best player in football through three weeks. And the rest of the defense is good enough to keep them in literally any game this season. Cleveland will be frisker than we thought in 2025.

28 – Panthers (1-2) 1

Speaking of unexpected feel-good wins… I don’t really know how that happened, but good for Carolina. It was the most nothing 30-0 win over a divisional opponent that you could come up with, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that it happened.

Is this the new expectation in Carolina? Hell no. But maybe they can parlay it into some better performances as they approach a soft portion of the schedule.

29 – Jets (0-3) 3

What do you even make of the Jets after that game? They were dreadful for about 58 minutes, which was to be expected with a backup QB in the game. Then came one of the more furious, rapid comebacks you’ll ever see. And, when it came down to it, they predictably choked it in the end.

I think my main takeaway is that New York clearly has a ton of juice and fight under Aaron Glenn. That was to be expected. But the talent just isn’t there right now. And that’s fine! The rebuild is still in its infancy. Having the right coach is step one. I think they do.

30 – Dolphins (0-3) 2

The problem in Miami is not Mike McDaniel. It’s Tua Tagovailoa. And that sucks, because the Dolphins don’t have a choice but to keep playing him.

I feel the same way about Tua as I do about Russell Wilson: it’s a disservice to the players and fans to have him play QB. But unlike the Giants, the Dolphins have no other way to go. They have to die on the Tua sword, and that’ll be this team’s undoing.

The team hasn’t given up on the coach. They are going to give up on the quarterback if they haven’t already.

31 – Titans (0-3) 3

I won’t be picking the Titans to win many, if any, games for the rest of the season. I’ve learned my lesson.

This team isn’t frisky or sneaky or anything. They just suck. And it’s not Cam Ward’s fault, but it’s the truth. The countdown to Brian Callahan’s firing is on.

32 – Saints (0-3) 2

Yeah, no.

Cover photo taken from Imagn Images.

1 – Packers (2-0) 2

This team is horrifying.

I’ve come to the conclusion that this Packers defense is the 2024 Eagles defense: rush four and get home effectively, allowing everyone else to keep their eyes on the ball because the opposing team can’t take the top off your defense. Teams have to fight for every single inch against this D, while the offense is clearly good enough to do the rest.

The addition of Micah Parsons has done exactly what we expected it to do. This team is completely galvanized by his presence, and you’d have to do a lot of convincing for me to knock them off this top spot right now.

2 – Bills (2-0) 1

Ho-hum, another easy win over a divisional opponent. The Bills defense took a huge step up against a Jets offense that went from electric to sputtering at best, and while Josh Allen didn’t light anything up, James Cook had an awesome game to prove his worth after getting that contract.

There’s really not much to say about Buffalo this week. This is how the rest of the season is going to look against their Charmin-soft schedule.

3 – Ravens (1-1) 1

Baltimore and Buffalo feel like they had identical performances after their electric showdown last week, bouncing back with massive wins over the bottom of their division.

But, unlike the Bills, the Ravens got a crazy good performance out of their star QB as Lamar Jackson tossed four touchdowns and took the NFL’s all-time lead in passer rating (not bad for a running back, eh?). What really stood out to me was how good DeAndre Hopkins and Tez Walker looked — if they can emerge as reliable targets on the outside, it’ll open things up so much for this passing game.

If you win a game by a larger margin than Derrick Henry’s rushing yardage total, you’re probably in a good spot.

4 – Chargers (2-0) 1

The Chargers feel like one of the NFL’s most balanced teams right now, doing great things on both sides of the ball. We can clearly see how good Justin Herbert is to start the season (early MVP candidate, perchance?) and their defense has been one of the best in football.

But, this running game is a major, major concern. LA is dead last in rush EPA/play through two weeks while their first-rounder Omarion Hampton has just 72 yards. It hasn’t bitten them yet because of how efficient their passing game is, but at some point, you’re going to need to tote the rock. I’ll choose to blame it on the offensive line still figuring itself out without Rashawn Slater, but I’d like to see them get it going.

5 – Eagles (2-0) 1

Meet the 2024 Chiefs’ long-lost twin. Defending champions that aren’t nearly impressive as they were in previous years that will win a number of games by the skin of their teeth for another dominant regular season on paper. We’ll see how it fares for them in January.

There’s still respect due in winning, as I’ve said previously with Kansas City. But this passing offense is absolutely stuck in neutral, Jalen Hurts still hasn’t thrown a touchdown, AJ Brown and DeVonta Smith have combined for 104 yards. 11.7% of their offensive snaps were tush pushes for crying out loud — and the sentiment around that play is finally turning into an overwhelmingly negative one, which could hopefully lead to some officiating changes this season. And I still have numerous questions about the secondary; plus, Jalen Carter looked awful in his return to play.

There’s some kinks to work out in Philadelphia, but they’re still going to keep winning. That’s just what they do.

6 – Rams (2-0) 3

This is a little higher than I want to put the Rams considering their two wins are against two winless teams, but they clearly deserve to be in the top-10. Matt Stafford has been really good through two games, Puka Nacua has been incredible, Davante Adams presence is felt in a big way and their run game has been surprisingly efficient.

The big story early on is how good this defense has been, but it appears that they haven’t played a competent offense yet. We’ll see how they fare against an Eagles unit that’s still figuring some stuff out.

7 – Lions (1-1) 3

Yeah, they’re fine. Turns out the Packers are just the ’85 Bears.

The Lions had a point to prove on Sunday. Not just after being smothered by Green Bay in Week 1 — they wanted to stick it to Ben Johnson. And boy, did they ever. And it was awesome!

Jared Goff was by far the best QB in football in Week 2, Amon-Ra St. Brown was unguardable, the offense looked like their 2024-selves and it rocked. The defense wasn’t amazing, but they don’t really need to be against a team as inept as the Bears.

They’ve got a real measuring stick game on Monday night in Baltimore. I’m fascinated to see how it plays out.

8 – Buccaneers (2-0)

The Buccaneers are 2-0, but could easily be 0-2. The difference? Baker freaking Mayfield.

The dude is just a stud. He’s a winner. Two game-winning drives in as many weeks against good defenses is remarkably impressive. It’s big time throw after big time run. It’s box office. He’s masking some real issues on that offensive line — which is continuing to take hits as more injuries rack up — and if the season ended today (thank God it doesn’t), he’d be my MVP.

The OL and secondary will be weaknesses for a while. But with Baker and the skill position players humming, they’ll still be able to win a good amount of games.

9 – Colts (2-0) 11

The story of the young 2025 NFL season? Indiana Jones.

Danny Dimes is having a Baker-esque resurgence in Indy, and it’s awesome to see. But more than that, this entire team seems to be rallying around the new life. Jonathan Taylor is running like he’s back at Wisconsin, Tyler Warren has emerged as a real impact rookie and this secondary has been lockdown. Just wait until their front seven gets healthy.

All of a sudden, the Colts are the favorites in the AFC South. What a time to be alive.

10 – Falcons (1-1) 4

It’s a new day in Atlanta: one where the Falcons actually have a defense. And it’s going to propel them this season.

The Falcons lead the league in defensive EPA/play and it’s in large part thanks to how impactful each of their rookies have been on that side of the ball. James Pearce Jr. and Jalon Walker each sacked JJ McCarthy on Sunday night while Xavier Watts and Billy Bowman both nabbed interceptions. I know it’s still early, but if I’m Terry Fontenot, I’d be posting receipts right now.

Michael Penix Jr. and the passing offense still have some figuring out to do, but Bijan Robinson is taking a massive load off his shoulders. He has probably been the best RB in the league through two weeks. And this schedule really ain’t crazy in the next few weeks. This squad could be in for a massive season if they continue on this trajectory.

11 – Broncos (1-1) 1

Though I picked the Broncos to lose on Sunday, I was impressed with them. They really only lost because of a bone-headed special teams error; despite a subpar game from their defense, Bo Nix bounced back with a fantastic performance to help restore the faith in Denver.

This team is going to be fine. They really just need consistency out of Nix and, apparently, some more level-headed coaching.

12 – Chiefs (0-2) 6

You hear that? Those are the panic alarm bells ringing.

I’ve played devil’s advocate with Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs for years. I always defend them regardless of circumstance because of the precedent they’ve set. Despite the Rashee Rice suspension and Xavier Worthy injury, the leash feels shorter now. This is simply not the Chiefs team we’ve come to expect.

Travis Kelce drives me nuts. Mahomes can’t hit deep shots. The running game is awful outside of Patrick’s scrambles. The defense is fine, but not nearly elite — hell, it’s the third best in their own division, probably.

They could’ve won on Sunday. Maybe they should’ve. But they didn’t. It’s a regression to the mean. And that’s a concern.

13 – Commanders (1-1) 6

Not all losses are created equal. Thursday night was a shining example of that.

To be honest with you guys, I’ve already flushed that lifeless, listless performance out of my brain. A full weekend of football will help you do that. It’s the lasting effects of this game that have really bogged me down.

Austin Ekeler out for the season, removing a pivotal piece of this offense with no clear replacement (yes, Bill is good, but no one can do what Ekeler does). Deatrich Wise out for the season, leaving behind a massive hole in terms of size and impact off the edge after just two games in DC. Noah Brown and John Bates both dealing with groin injuries that can sideline them for a while, meaning this already stagnant offense is going to struggle even further to move the ball.

And then, the big one. After the worst game of his career, Jayden Daniels is dealing with a sprained knee that could sideline him for a game or two. I will say, that’s way better news than a place like Cincinnati is getting. But it’s still not great. I don’t blame him, I don’t blame the offensive line, I don’t even blame the institution of Thursday Night Football. It’s the nature of the sport. These things happen.

I just hope we err on the side of caution here. Despite not playing in camp or the preseason, Marcus Mariota is a great backup who’s more than capable of beating the Raiders. I know Jayden will hate to sit, but it’s Week 3. What bothers me is that this offense is going to continue to be stuck in neutral with him not practicing. The effects of Terry McLaurin’s absence in camp are clearly hindering this passing game and it drives me nuts. Things might get worse before they get better in DC.

Expectations suck, don’t they?

14 – 49ers (2-0) 5

I have no idea what to do with the 49ers right now. They’re 2-0 with two wins over teams that aren’t in my top-20, have injuries out the wazoo and haven’t looked super impressive. But, neither have many of the teams below them — even some other 2-0 squads!

So, I’m leaving them here while acknowledging that they could go in any number of directions while they get healthy. Because they’re the league’s biggest enigma right now, and I can’t be bothered to try and solve them.

15 – Vikings (1-1) 2

Can I put on my tinfoil hat for a second? Cool, thanks.

I don’t think JJ McCarthy is actually hurt. If you take out one admittedly great quarter in Week 1, he has been the worst quarterback in football. He looks lost, his processing is remarkably slow and he has little-to-no feel in the pocket. But, despite taking some big hits, he seemed like he wasn’t banged up at the end of the game — just upset about his performance.

So, where did this phantom ankle injury come from? No doubt that it could be legit, I just feel like we would’ve had some inclination of a tweak that’s going to sideline him for a month on a national broadcast. Maybe that’s just me.

In any case, it’s the Carson Wentz show in Minny for a month. That’s not very inspiring. But it’s a good opportunity for JJ to recalibrate while Carson tries to keep the ship afloat.

16 – Cowboys (1-1)

Good lord this defense is abysmal. The only team with a worse dropback EPA/play is the Dolphins. Not great company to keep.

Does it matter that the offense is humming right now? Absolutely. That’s a great sign — maybe one that we should’ve expected with Brian Schottenheimer at the helm and a healthy Dak Prescott. But, with the defense performing this poorly against anyone and everyone, I have serious doubts about how seriously we should be taking Dallas right now.

17 – Patriots (1-1) 7

The Pats are another team that I really don’t know where to place.

Was I impressed with their offense, particularly Drake Maye, on Sunday? Absolutely. But they were playing the Dolphins. So, I’m taking it with a grain of salt. I still think this secondary is Swiss cheese, though the defense has been stout against the run up front.

Consistency will be the key to success for New England. Right now, I don’t know if we’re going to see that. But, the upcoming schedule is pretty manageable, so if there was ever a time to get everything on the same page, it’s now.

18 – Texans (0-2) 3

I’m trying my best not to overreact here. The Texans could have been 2-0 at this point. But here we are, 0-2 after a heartbreaker at home on Monday night, staring up at the freaking Colts of all teams. Not great.

It’s the same issues, man. The offensive line is a joke. The running game isn’t good enough to offset the shortcomings in the passing game. CJ Stroud isn’t allowed the time to be his 2023-self, but he just doesn’t look like that version of himself in general. And while the defense is awesome, there’s not much they can do to overcome their offensive ineptitude.

This feels like last year’s Houston team all over again. But now, the division is catching up, and they’re not banking the wins early in the season like they did in 2024. And that’s going to be a problem when they’re scrapping for a playoff spot in three months.

19 – Cardinals (2-0) 2

Scraping your way to 2-0 with two close wins over the Saints and Panthers isn’t very inspiring. It’s not like the Cardinals have come out and dominated these games — I know they were in control against Carolina, but they damn near threw it away in the end, and that concerns me.

I like this team. I think they’re really talented, their defense has honestly been really good so far — not sure what that means against these opponents — and their offense is solid. I’m just not really impressed right now.

20 – Bengals (2-0) 9

It’s over.

For the third time in his six seasons as a pro, Joe Burrow’s season has ended short. I know this turf toe situation isn’t “season ending,” but you and I both know that it essentially is. If he returns by Christmas, what’s the point? Do we really think Jake Browning is going to keep this team in the playoff race?

It just drives me nuts. They don’t even try to improve the offensive line situation, and no matter how many times they try to make it work, it fails and fails and fails again. Burrow deserves better. And I don’t know if he’ll ever get it.

I’ve seen a number of Andrew Luck comparisons out there, and I’m horrified to say that they’re legit. I just hope Joe doesn’t go the Luck route. But, if he did, can you even blame him?

Oh, and they were extremely lucky to win on Sunday, anyways.

21 – Seahawks (1-1) 2

Hey, I guess the Seahawks aren’t that bad after all. Honestly, this game wasn’t very different than Week 1 for me — they still look pretty average on both sides of the ball, but their shorthanded secondary played much better against Pittsburgh, which gives me some more confidence about them.

If the strategy to win games is just to force feed Jaxon Smith-Njigba and let Kenneth Walker do the rest, it’s good enough for me.

22 – Steelers (1-1) 5

So, was the Steelers-Jets Week 1 just a total fugazi for both sides? Certainly seems like the case.

Aaron Rodgers looked like his Jets self rather than his Packers self like he did last week, the run game stunk, the defense continued to get gashed and that special teams error by Kaleb Johnson was inexcusable.

This just doesn’t feel like a very Steelers-like Steelers team. They’ve got some soul-searching to do while they try to figure out who they are.

23 – Raiders (1-1) 5

There’s the dark side of Geno Smith. I don’t know what the problem was on Monday night, but that was one of the worst games I’ve seen Geno play since his career resurgence. And I’m embarrassed as a guy who always advocates for him.

I think the bigger issue is the run game. Ashton Jeanty has been completely invisible through two games and isn’t displaying a modicum of effort in pass pro. It’s really concerning. I know this offensive line isn’t great, but he’s supposed to be that guy. And he just doesn’t look the part through two games.

I’ll shout out the run defense for being crazy good, though. The Patriots and Chargers have two of the worst run games in the league, but that’s been the Raiders’ strong suit early on. We’ll see if they can sustain it.

24 – Jaguars (1-1) 1

Should the Jaguars be 2-0 right now? Probably. Did they deserve to lose on Sunday? Honestly, yeah.

It’s not because of the decision to go for that fourth down at the end of the game. I completely agreed with that call and I don’t think Liam Coen should be catching the flak that he is right now. They should have converted that if Brian Thomas Jr. could catch. Or play football. Which he … just can’t right now.

BTJ is embarrassing himself on the field. He has a clear lack of effort with a glaring unwillingness to absorb contact or try to play receiver remotely effectively. Does he just hate Trevor Lawrence or something? It makes no sense. And if it continues, it will get ugly for him.

Oh, also, that DPI call on Travis Hunter that allowed the Bengals to continue their game-winning drive was a total joke. I feel bad for him.

25 – Giants (0-2) 5

I have no remote idea where Sunday’s offensive explosion came from, but I honestly loved it. It’s easy to root for anyone to do that against Dallas, so thanks, Giants.

Let the record show that I don’t expect this to continue at all. Russell Wilson turning the clock back for a game was cool and all, but that won’t happen against the Chiefs. Or most competent defenses.

And this defense still sucks. They are horrendous against the run and porous at best against the pass. I’m just giving them some respect for what we saw out of their offense, which will undoubtedly come crashing back down soon.

26 – Jets (0-2) 4

Ah, yes. The dreaded return to Earth. Welcome back, Jets! Hope you enjoyed the one game of false hope. I know I did.

27 – Bears (0-2) 1

Two-for-two on cathartic hate watches in 2025. I can always count on you to give me a dopamine hit, Chicago.

Caleb Williams was far from the No. 1 problem for the Bears on Sunday, but he sure as hell wasn’t good, either. The defense is getting ran through like your stomach after gas station sushi, Ben Johnson looks like he’s in way over his skis and they can’t run the ball worth a damn.

If this offense doesn’t look competent against Dallas on Sunday, we shall be declaring this season a lost cause in Chicago.

28 – Titans (0-2) 1

It seems like we’re going to see the epic highs and lows of Cam Ward every week of the season. Yes, he’s going to make plays that drop your jaw. Then he’s going to make plays that make you scream at the television the same way Will Levis did. At least that’s what I expected.

The Titans are good enough to give you a fight, but not good enough to win games right now. This is the worst offense in football with a defense that lacks any impact players, all while coaching continues to be a glaring weakness. It’s going to be a long season in Music City.

29 – Panthers (0-2) 2

I’m going to be honest with y’all. I just don’t feel like talking about this Panthers team.

This OL is embarrassing, Xavier Legette looks like a total bust and Bryce Young starts and ends games so poorly for some reason. Oh, and the defense still stinks. Yawn.

30 – Saints (0-2) 1

Impressive fight! That’s kind of what I expected. Still, it’s not enough.

But hey, Spencer Rattler isn’t that bad and Juwan Johnson is a fantasy beast. Three cheers for that!

31 – Browns (0-2) 3

Ah, there are the Browns we’re used to.

Maybe Sunday’s game was closer than the scoreboard would indicate, and they did a fantastic job of bottling up the run. But it doesn’t matter when your offense is this bad, particularly in the passing game. I do think Quinshon Judkins will give them a boost out of the backfield, but it won’t matter until one of the rookies takes over under center.

32 – Dolphins (0-2)

Yeah, that’s the last time I put my faith in this abomination of a team. Blow it up!

Cover photo taken from WTOP.

1 – Bills (1-0)

Buffalo deserves to be at No. 1 sheerly based on the fact that they won on Sunday night. Did it look like they could hang with the Ravens for most of the game? No. But, Josh Allen did Josh Allen things, putting on the superhero cape and leading one of the more furious comebacks we’ve seen in recent memory to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. That’s worth being on top to start off the 2025 season. But man, they need to get right on defense, particularly in the back end. Ed Oliver is a monster up front, but the lack of a pass rush combined with the injuries they have in the secondary make for a sticky situation. The good news for Buffalo, though? They don’t play another contender until November.

2 – Ravens (0-1)

I want to make something clear: I still think the Ravens are the best team in the NFL. They had no business losing a game in which they looked like world-beaters for three-and-a-half quarters. Lamar Jackson and Derrick Henry are both still insane, and I left Sunday night feeling better about Zay Flowers than I ever have. I think this secondary could be a huge weakness seeing as though the Jaire Alexander acquisition isn’t exactly as impactful as many might’ve assumed, but I still believe this is the most talented roster in football from top to bottom. They’ll likely be at No. 1 very soon.

3 – Packers (1-0)

The most eye-opening performance of Week 1 probably goes to Green Bay after absolutely thrashing Detroit in a game that almost signifies a passing of the torch at the top of the NFC North. What’s kind of nuts is that the Packers didn’t do anything that blew you away statistically; the box score is one of lies and deception considering the Lions’ end-of-game numbers. It was simply a good old fashioned butt-whooping. Jordan Love was on fire and the defense was suffocating. They looked like the contenders I expect them to be, even with Micah Parsons on a snap count. Considering his impact when he was on the field, imagine what it’ll look like when he’s a full-time starter.

4 – Eagles (1-0)

You alright, guys? Do the receivers want to get open against a bad secondary? Does the offensive line want to get a push against a defensive line that no longer has Micah Parsons (though is admittedly improved in the interior)? Does the defense want to show up in the first half? Does Jalen Hurts want to throw a ball past the sticks? Oh well, I guess it doesn’t matter. Hurts was a killer with his legs, and that was the difference. The Eagles are elite for a reason — they don’t need to play their best game every week to win games. They’ll stick to grinding you down over the course of four quarters. But I’m team process over results, and I don’t really like the process I saw. The run defense was abysmal — though Jalen Carter being tossed before the first play from scrimmage plays a big role there — the secondary looked like a glaring weakness and the receiving corps was quiet. But, this is Philly. Those problems won’t last long, I imagine.

5 – Chargers (1-0)

Good for the Chargers to finally get a signature win under Jim Harbaugh and Justin Herbert. For my money, Friday night’s performance in Brazil was the best of Herbert’s career, and one that vindicates me for all the support I’ve given him over the years. Against a Chiefs defense that we know is good, LA got everything and anything they wanted, utilizing an effective run game to create a deadly play action attack. And with plenty of time to throw, Herbert was surgical. Combine that with an inspiring defensive performance, and the Chargers looked truly elite. Now, it’s a matter of sustaining it.

6 – Chiefs (0-1)

Stop hurting your own players, guys. This ain’t a sustainable formula for winning. For that matter, please figure out what the hell is going on when it comes to downfield passing. How and why Patrick Mahomes has turned into one of the league’s worst deep passers is beyond me, but it has gotten to a point where I’m concerned. Can KC continue to be a dink and dunk, death-by-a-thousand-papercuts offense? Sure. But I don’t think that’s what Patrick wants. In any case, even without Xavier Worthy, this offense isn’t my problem. It’s what I saw out of the defense. No pass rush, no discipline in the secondary, and no real resistance. If that repeats itself against the Eagles in Week 2, it will not end well.

7 – Commanders (1-0)

Everyone who hated on the acquisitions of Javon Kinlaw and Deebo Samuel, please meet me outside. I just want to talk. Led by Kinlaw and Da’Ron Payne — who might hoop in his second contract year — the defensive line was the single best unit on the field on Sunday. And on offense, Samuel was the sparkplug, making an instant impact and looking like the player we saw out west for so many years. Combine that with a ho-hum game from Jayden Daniels, a dazzling debut from Bill Croskey-Merritt and a lockdown showing from the secondary, and you get Sunday’s result. Things can be described pretty succinctly — you know it’s a new day in DC when the team plays a game that neither they nor us are super impressed by, and they still win by 15 without allowing a touchdown. Feels good, doesn’t it?

8 – Buccaneers (1-0)

Man, this team is fun. I knew Emeka Egbuka would be an instant impact player, but I didn’t realize it’d be like this. You won’t hear any complaints from me, though. Baker Mayfield was unreal on Sunday, and this offense looked like the exciting unit we expected. I still have concerns about this defense, particularly on the backend, and Tampa got away with a couple of Falcons blunders, but I won’t hold that against them for now. I feel like the Bucs won that game more than the Falcons lost it.

9 – Rams (1-0)

That looked nothing like I expected it to. You’re telling me that the Rams defense out-performed their offense and were the chief reason why they won against a good team? Maybe the end of last year really is sustainable. I also know that LA won’t face a pass rush as ferocious as Houston’s again this season, which is good news for Matt Stafford, who still made the plays he had to in order to win the game. I give a ton of credit to the Rams across the board for pulling that one out. It was very impressive.

10 – Lions (0-1)

Yikes. Just yikes. I was expecting to be proven right at some point this season, but I didn’t know it’d look like that, and I didn’t think it’d be so quick. But our worst fears might be on the verge of coming true, and the Lions might be in serious trouble. The offense looked completely discombobulated and disjointed, completely unable to look remotely competent or on-time like they were under Ben Johnson. What’s the point of all that talent on offense if they can’t mesh to make it work like they did previously? John Morton has a lot to figure out. Oh, and the defense still ain’t exactly ready to step up, either. I still think Detroit will be fine against lesser teams, but they’re clearly not the contender they were in the past two seasons.

11 – Bengals (1-0)

So, I guess playing your starters in the preseason means… nothing? By all means, the Bengals should have lost on Sunday. They had seven — count them, seven — yards of offense in the second half on Sunday and got away with the Browns missing two kicks of less than 40 yards. Putting them at No. 11 honestly feels gross. Joe Burrow was awful, Ja’Marr Chase was a nonfactor, the offense was stuck in mud. The defense wasn’t good either, just opportunistic. Credit where credit is due for snagging a couple of picks when it mattered, but I’ve never seen a win feel more like a loss. Cincy needs to tighten up ASAP considering what their next few games look like. We’ll see what they’re really made of very soon.

12 – Broncos (1-0)

Speaking of wins that felt like losses, here’s your Denver Broncos! Now, for what its worth, they were largely dominant on Sunday, having the largest delta in net success rate against their opponent of any team in the league this week. But it just didn’t feel that way. The Titans beat themselves more than the Broncos did with drops galore and horrendous coaching. And Denver should be thankful for that, because Bo Nix was arguably the worst quarterback in football in Week 1. Three awful turnovers, terrible decision-making and just horrifically inefficient play leaves such a sour taste in the mouth. But, Denver’s defense is still elite, and that was enough… for now. Let’s see what happens when you’re not playing the Titans.

13 – Vikings (1-0)

What a coaching job that was by Kevin O’Connell. To settle your quarterback down in his first start on the road on Monday Night Football after three dreadful quarters of play was unreal to watch in real time. And I’ve got to give a ton of credit to JJ McCarthy, who had as many touchdowns thrown to the defense as first downs going into the fourth quarter, but still dusted off his shoulders and locked in for an incredible comeback. He showed poise, determination and a will to win on top of really great playmaking ability. The remade offensive line looked dominant and the defense was flying around. If the Vikings can extrapolate their fourth quarter into consistency across full games, this team will be right in the playoff mix.

14 – Falcons (0-1)

All of a sudden, I feel really good about the Falcons. Michael Penix Jr.? Stud. Bijan Robinson? Most dynamic player in football this season, probably. James Pearce Jr.? Instant impact off the edge, silencing so many doubters, albeit against a patchwork offensive line. Xavier Watts? Probably the most impressive rookie defensive back this week. Kyle Pitts? Actually good! If it wasn’t for Younghoe Koo’s right leg, we’d be talking about the Falcons as having one of the more impressive performances of Week 1. But, alas. We’ll have to settle for a dynamite SNF matchup in Minnesota to see if they can keep it up.

15 – Texans (0-1)

So, when is the Texans offense going to look competent? Ever again? Please? I don’t want CJ Stroud to come out and say this team was “lollygagging” ever again. The defense is obviously still insane, but it won’t matter until this offense wakes the hell up. The protection is still a glaring issue, which is just going to hold these guys back. Although, I was pleasantly surprised with the run game. Nick Chubb still has some gas left in the tank. In any case, things aren’t getting easier for Houston with the Bucs on tap, so the offense better figure itself out if they want to avoid an 0-2 start.

16 – Cowboys (0-1)

Hey, that wasn’t as bad as we thought it’d be! Good for you! Dak Prescott was genuinely awesome in the opener, though the stats won’t reflect it. The run game was cooking for most of the game, and the defense was a pleasant surprise when it came to anything but stopping quarterback scrambles. If CeeDee Lamb could catch — just a strange problem dating back to last year that’s bogging down one of the league’s best receivers — we’d be talking about the Cowboys as pulling the upset of the opening slate. Alas, we’ll have to settle for giving them a moral victory instead.

17 – Steelers (1-0)

Unc still got it. Aaron Rodgers was straight up awesome on Sunday — a statement I didn’t think I’d ever make again. The Jets defense is no slouch, and he still threw it all over the place. Now, the Steelers got just about every break to win it, from a fumble on a kickoff to two super long field goals from Chris Boswell. And I wasn’t very impressed with this defense, though they made the plays when it was time to make them. More than anything, I’m just a lot more interested in this Steelers team. Because that game looked nothing like what I expected it to. So, what comes next?

18 – Raiders (1-0)

It’s too early to take my Geno Smith victory lap, especially considering the secondary that he was facing on Sunday. But that game gives me confidence that QB play will not be a weakness in Vegas this fall. The run game, on the other hand, was concerning. Yes, the Patriots have a much stronger front seven, but Ashton Jeanty was not drafted to have 38 yards on 19 carries. I hope they can open things up more for him as the season rolls along. And we’ll see how the defense plays when they line up against some more put-together offenses, like the Chargers on Monday night.

19 – 49ers (1-0)

Is this harsh? Probably. But it’s more of a reflection of the current state of the 49ers, who are staring at a game against the Saints without Brock Purdy, George Kittle, Jauan Jennings and Brandon Aiyuk. They were absolutely blessed by the football gods to pull that win out in Seattle. There wasn’t really any area where I was impressed, other than with Trent Williams, Fred Warner and Nick Bosa, which is par for the course. Obviously all those Jake Moody misses play a role, but I just need to see the Niners consistently win with all these issues they’re dealing with before putting them above some teams that I thought were more impressive this week.

20 – Colts (1-0)

Well, well, well. Indiana Jones had a smashing opening weekend at the box office. Good for him, and good for the Colts. I’ll take it with a grain of salt because the Dolphins are an absolute joke, and I’m fascinated to see what the sequel looks like against one of the best defenses in football this week.

21 – Cardinals (1-0)

Most nothing win of Week 1? Most nothing win ever? People are asking. But, a win is a win. The Cardinals helped people remain alive in their survivor pools with a remarkably unimpressive win in New Orleans, but I’m leaving with two major positives. To start, Marvin Harrison Jr. was involved! Keep that up. And second, Will Johnson looked every bit like the stud we thought he’d be coming out of college. Looks like Arizona got a real steal there.

22 – Jets (0-1)

I said it earlier with Pittsburgh: that didn’t look anything like what I expected it to, but I still loved it. Justin Fields blew us all away, Breece Hall looked explosive and Garrett Wilson was a dog. I’m disappointed in what I saw out of this defense, but I’m not sure how long that’ll continue for. Maybe, just maybe, this Jets team is better than we thought they’d be. Or, this might just be another Fields flash in the pan. I’m sincerely hoping for the former.

23 – Seahawks (0-1)

Like their counterparts in Week 1, I feel like I’m being a little harsh to Seattle here. Sam Darnold wasn’t awful by any means, Jaxon Smith-Njigba was a monster and the defense held their own… until they didn’t. And that’s what bothers me. Riq Woolen has turned into an absolute liability at corner and now Nick Emmanwori could be headed to the injured reserve. I don’t know if either side of the ball in Seattle is good enough to lift up the other, which means these first few weeks could go awry, especially with some solid teams looming on the schedule.

24 – Patriots (0-1)

Boring? Underwhelming? All of the above. I do like what I saw out of Drake Maye, but that was about it. I was expecting a lot more out of the run game, which was way too quiet for my liking. The defense held up as best as they could with Christian Gonzalez being out, but it wasn’t enough. But this was never going to be an overnight thing, as I said. We’ll see how this group continues to gel in the weeks to come.

25 – Jaguars (1-0)

Was that a good-looking win for the Jags? Yeah, I guess so. But let’s see it again. And against a better team, please. I think Trevor Lawrence looked good, but certainly not great, so I think this offense still has some work to do. And they’re not going to play many defenses as bad as Carolina’s for the rest of the year. So, show it to me again before I put the respect on you that a lot of folks in the media are.

26 – Bears (0-1)

Thank you for one of the best hatewatches I’ve had in years. Game one under Ben Johnson with Caleb Williams looked like so much of what I expected: some scripted success to start followed by abysmal offense, horrendous inaccuracy, bad body language and general feelings of giving up en route to blowing a double-digit fourth quarter lead at home to a division rival. It might be too early to take my victory lap and gloat, but this one is a feather in my cap. Now, Chicago is on the verge of facing some uncomfortable questions if this keeps up. But we’ll cross those bridges when we get there.

27 – Panthers (0-1)

After a summer’s worth of hype following the way Bryce Young ended 2024, he goes out there and does that? Not great. This defense is still awful and Bryce looked overwhelmed against a Jags defense that’s nothing amazing. At least Tetairoa McMillan looked awesome!

28 – Browns (0-1)

The Browns managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory in ways that truly only they can. They moved the ball effectively against Cincinnati while their own defense absolutely suffocated what’s supposed to be one of the best offenses in the league. And it didn’t matter because their kicker can’t kick. Only Cleveland. But, at least we can see that this defense will still hold its weight while the offense flails around for a few weeks until Quinshon Judkins provides a boost in the run game.

29 – Titans (0-1)

Just an abject disaster. Brian Callahan was the worst head coach of Week 1 for a CVS receipt’s worth of reasons and nobody lining up to catch passes could do that. Cam Ward’s tape vastly outshines his numbers, which is about what I expected this season. But man, I didn’t know it’d be this bad. So, I simultaneously have hope because of Ward, but no hope because of coaching and the rest of the offense. It’s going to be a weird year in Tennessee.

30 – Giants (0-1)

Just bleh. Russell Wilson doesn’t have much time left in this league, the run game was absolutely smothered, and while the defensive front looked good at times, this Giants team was simply outmatched and buried on Sunday. Never a good sign when you don’t score a touchdown and are the lowest-scoring team of the slate. This team really just isn’t worth talking about until Jaxson Dart starts playing.

31 – Saints (0-1)

If Spencer Rattler is truly better than Tyler Shough, then I fear the Saints completely wasted that draft selection. I do think New Orleans looked better than the dumpster fire we expected, but I told you guys the game would be close. This offense is just an unwatchable product — much like those disgraceful alternate uniforms — although Kelvin Banks had a nice debut at the tackle spot. And the defense isn’t good enough to make up for any of it.

32 – Dolphins (0-1)

Our expectations for you were low, but holy cow. I wasn’t expecting this level of a dumpster fire. Everyone in Miami should be ashamed. But, none of them will be there in a few months’ time, so maybe they just don’t care. It certainly looks like they don’t. Nobody respects Tua, nobody respects Mike McDaniel and nobody wants to be there. What a mess. This might get blown up sooner than I anticipated.